Housemates boyfriend never leaves

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I'm surprised people are so concerned about the money and not the fact that the boyfriend has been aggressive to other housemates...that is completely unacceptable when he doesn't even live there! I wouldn't even bother asking for the money at this point, would just say to the housemate that if the boyfriend keeps coming round you're going to take further landlord/police action. Nobody has to put up with that in their own home.

Reply 61

littlesmurfette

Original post by Tyrion_Lannister

So what? Why does it matter? I hate people who ruin things for others.

Seeing as you are obviously happy to pay to keep others warm- fancy paying my heating bill??

No? Didn't think so.

That's why it matters.

OP- I would contact your landlord. Yeah you may make an enemy out of your housemate- but you have what, six months to put up with her? Five if you go home in the holidays.

Reply 62

has_700

Original post by Tyrion_Lannister

Don't be a dick and **** up someone's relationship just because you're not in one. This kind of stuff happens in shared houses, if you don't like it live on your own. Sorry but that's how it is

Are you by any chance the girlfriend everybody is talking about? :cool:

Reply 63

Bronco2012

Original post by Beckyweck

I think the rent is iffy ground. They're sharing space between them, it's not like he has his own room that other people are paying for. IMO rent should be at the discretion of the person sharing. Bills are totally legit though.

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Even the rent though, it's not just the room you're paying for, it's a 1/nth share of kitchen space, of the bathroom etc(n = number of bedrooms), this leecher can't be getting all that for free.

Reply 64

graceey_bear

go to the land lord! :smile:

not being funny but I'm in a relationship of 4yrs and although we don't go to the same uni there ten minutes apart and I've got an agreement that mine will stop over once a week, :smile:

and if stops over more he has to pay ie his car broke and couldn't commute in so he paid £20 into the kitty (bills- we thought it fair since we pay £70per week plus bills) each week and he bought the communal foods ie bread milk eggs.

Honestly it's not a healthy relationship to have if you have to be glued to each other so much that it turns you ignorant to your housemates it's not right! good luck

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Reply 65

username991125

I don't see a problem unless he is using more water/electricity etc than what the housemate uses if he wasn't there. If the electricity etc doubles for example, then yes he needs to contribute to the bills.

I had my boyfriend stay for about 6 weeks straight. I had two other housemates who didn't mind at all. The bills didn't really change because we showered together, did laundry together (my own clothes never usually filled the entire load anyway), cooked together, etc. He also spent his entire time in my room other than when we needed to use the kitchen/bathroom. The only thing he contributed to was food. We split the weekly shopping equally.

The difference from OP's case is that my bf respected the space of my housemates. He was away from the house from 8am - 9pm during the weekdays. He also only stayed in my room, and was only there when I was around.

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Reply 66

username242140

Original post by Bronco2012

Even the rent though, it's not just the room you're paying for, it's a 1/nth share of kitchen space, of the bathroom etc(n = number of bedrooms), this leecher can't be getting all that for free.

I get that, but I think it's quite difficult to calculate the value of renting a kitchen and lounge. And then when one becomes pedantic about every single thing he could possibly pay it looks a bit pathetic. It's like saying "well! You left your shoes in the porch which isn't your space so you have to pay an extra pound a week".

I'm not saying what he's doing is ok, and he definitely should be paying bills, but being fussy about rent like that makes them look a bit silly.

Reply 67

Bronco2012

Original post by Beckyweck

Honestly they have every right to be upset about him being there at all.

Reply 68

Bronco2012

Original post by yennibubs

That's fine with the consent of your housemates.

But if the housemates didn't like it, then they don't have to lump it.

Reply 69

Pink lipstick

Original post by Tyrion_Lannister

Don't be a dick and **** up someone's relationship just because you're not in one. This kind of stuff happens in shared houses, if you don't like it live on your own. Sorry but that's how it is

What a stupid selfish thing to say. Its not about ruining their relationship, its about paying for someone else to reap where they haven't sown.

Reply 70

JC.

In the real world, the extra it costs in gas / water / electric is pretty negligible. It's a none issue.

The only cause for concern is the guy getting leathered and having a go at other folk in the house. If he tried that on with me he'd be physically ejected.

Reply 71

username47781

Please can we cut the fighting and arguing out, any posts that involve arguing or personal attacks will be removed.

Reply 72

rmhumphries

For those who are suggesting splitting the bills, then for a lot, then the amount caused by an extra person sharing a room is less than you think:

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Rent. Most apply agree this is irrelevant, however those saying he will use extra communal space - I imagine for that he uses his partner's kitchen stuff and toiletries, and unless he is (wanting to/ in the) shower at the same time as other people want to be in the shower, I imagine he is mostly using the existing 'slack' time of the bathroom. There is no justification for charging him rent, as he causes no increase in rent or non-trivial decrease in facilities - and in some cases landlords will rent rooms out to couples for the same price as single people.

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Water. This will vary by area, however the majority of students I have known have had a fixed water bill. As it is based on the rateable value of the property, then the cost will not have increased due to this presence. For metered bills, then only a certain part is actually linked to the use of water - so you should only split into 6 the portion related to 'usage' of the water, not the whole bill.

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Gas (where used). This is going to depend a lot of what the gas is used for. For central heating, there will be no increase due to the boyfriend, unless he puts it on a lot unilaterally. This will be the biggest gas expense from the boiler. Depending on how old your boiler is, then hot water (excluding standing charge) is likely to cost around £10/month - possibly less. As such, the increase for one extra person is going to be a rather small amount ~£1/2 quid If you use a gas cooker, he might again generate a small increase in the gas bill - but again I don't think this will amount to an increase of more than £5/month.
[*} Electricity. This is the big one - but again usage increase will depend on what he does. Watching TV with his partner is no more expensive than the partner watching TV alone. Charging his phone costs about 20p per 100 hours of charging. Lights cost about 20p per 50 hours if you have energy efficient light-bulbs. Unless you have reason to suspect he is using lots of electricity for something of his own, then how do you know he is increasing your bills?