don't want to hurt this guy Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 5 years ago
#1
There is this guy on my course who wants to date me/go out with me. I think he is ok, not my type but he is interesting to talk to. we have kissed a few times but he is always making the move and he has sensed it. The reason why I am so distant with him it's cause I am very confused at the moment, I am still trying to get over my ex (we have been messaging each other recently but there is no hope for us cause I moved 700 miles away). I wouldn't mind a rebound or a f buddy but this guy is not it, I can see him falling for me. I am scared I will hurt him.

I guess I know what the majority of you are going to say but I really don't know what the best thing for me would be right now. I think I just needed to get it off my chest.
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Masoudy
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#2
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#2
Tell him in his face
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Heathen Christ
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#3
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#3
Why do you care he isnt worth anything to you
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Little Wolf Taima
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#4
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I was in the same situation as you once.

He wasn't an ex as we never actually got together but I still pined over him. Meanwhile I slept with the white knight who listened to me cry over this 'ex'. Instead of moping about and chasing men who will never want me I decided to keep seeing him even though it could have been a one night stand. You might fall for him if you allow yourself to and he doesn't actively repulse you.

I appreciate you worrying about upsetting him, but If he really cares for you it might be a good idea to give it a chance. Be honest with him about why you are apprehensive. I told my 'rebound' all about why I am guarded and still being emotionally attached to a guy I can never be with. We helped eachother get over it. It's been 18 months and we're going to Amsterdam for my birthday next month x
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Crumpet1
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#5
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"I think you're great, but I'm still getting over my ex and I'm just not ready right now".

Simples.
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mahatma ghandi
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#6
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Just say your not looking for anything serious
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1219269
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#7
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(Original post by Crumpet1)
"I think you're great, but I'm still getting over my ex and I'm just not ready right now".

Simples.
Yes it's nice and he'll get the message


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Abigail Tompsett
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#8
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ok
im afraid that their is no chance of not hurting him,
from experience a man's pride once crush can get easily hurt and if a guy is refused then in my experiance they dont want to carry on... no matter how nicely you put it.
i like you, would never have wanted to hurt anyone like that but the guys ive had trouble with, though i have basically said 'i think your great but not ready right now' to them it is like the world ended. i dont know what it is but it is far better to make them aware asap because the more they like you the more they will feel hurt.
it is hard but its just one of those things :/
hope it goes ok x
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username945458
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#9
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Just print off what you've written and hand it to him .

Or


Just take a break from guys. Tell him you dont wanna lead him on and that you have to focus on you atm.you don't need another complication ir person in your life.
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Anonymous #1
#10
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ok, little update-

Today I met him and told him I can't be with him because I don't want just a fling and I have no energy for this and I am still in contact with my ex, can't continue cause he is leaving after this year and there is no point starting anything. He had an answer to everything I said! I even said I am looking for a guy to marry and have babies with. But he just won't have it. He told me when he leaves distant won't be a problem if it works out, he is happy to fly from France and back 5 times a year to see me! WTF?! I got drunk and we kissed, it's been 2 weeks, 2 WEEKS! And he won't take no for an answer. So I started telling him I am prone to cheating, I want a serious relationship, I am too old for him (3.5 years older), he is too French for me, I am too crazy for him etc... I used every excuse under the sun as well as real reasons why I don't want to be with him. He didn't listen to any of it.

What the hell do I do now? He just doesn't listen!
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Awesome-o
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#11
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(Original post by Anonymous)
ok, little update-

Today I met him and told him I can't be with him because I don't want just a fling and I have no energy for this and I am still in contact with my ex, can't continue cause he is leaving after this year and there is no point starting anything. He had an answer to everything I said! I even said I am looking for a guy to marry and have babies with. But he just won't have it. He told me when he leaves distant won't be a problem if it works out, he is happy to fly from France and back 5 times a year to see me! WTF?! I got drunk and we kissed, it's been 2 weeks, 2 WEEKS! And he won't take no for an answer. So I started telling him I am prone to cheating, I want a serious relationship, I am too old for him (3.5 years older), he is too French for me, I am too crazy for him etc... I used every excuse under the sun as well as real reasons why I don't want to be with him. He didn't listen to any of it.

What the hell do I do now? He just doesn't listen!
Garlic round the neck and a stripy jumper big turn offs for you?
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Anonymous #1
#12
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(Original post by Awesome-o)
Garlic round the neck and a stripy jumper big turn offs for you?
more like the language barrier, I have to use google translate during our conversations
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