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Reply 20
Original post by CJKay
To be fair, he is right... at least anecdotally. :dontknow: Every single argument my parents have is about how much my Mum spent from the joint account on frivolous things and there's a reason there are so many jokes about men getting married and finding their bank accounts empty. :lol: And given how many women you see walking around with ridiculous things like Gucci handbags, stupidly expensive shoes, piled on makeup with fake lashes and dyed hair, you'd be hard-pressed to disagree his comment does apply to a good number of women you see every day.
Obviously it doesn't apply to everyone, but it's not sexist given that he used "most". Whether it really is "most" doesn't really have a lot of research behind it, but everywhere you go there are advertisements for women to buy pointless things, and these companies don't survive on bankruptcy.


my mum sorts all the finances for my dad, I do the same for my boyfriend. I know more men who have gambled away all the joint account money to the point their wife is struggling to feed the children.
Reply 21
Original post by redferry
my mum sorts all the finances for my dad, I do the same for my boyfriend. I know more men who have gambled away all the joint account money to the point their wife is struggling to feed the children.


I did say it was anecdotal. :dontknow: That doesn't stop it being a genuine problem though, and it's not a sexist worry because, obviously, you know women who have had the same problem. I've only ever been told joint accounts are a bad idea, but with so few stay-at-homes now it doesn't really look like it'll be too much of a problem in the future. Where he used "most women" it probably should have been "anybody" though.
(edited 10 years ago)
Reply 22
Original post by redferry
Hahaha you are so unbelievably sexist!

I have to agree with them, not because I'm a male but because I have a good know how of business.

Example: (Real research)

Spoiler

(edited 10 years ago)
Reply 23
Original post by redferry
Hahaha you are so unbelievably sexist!


He's correct, women get sucked in the same way children get sucked in by adverts showing toys.
Reply 24
Original post by CJKay
I did say it was anecdotal. :dontknow: That doesn't stop it being a genuine problem though, and it's not a sexist worry because, obviously, you know women who have had the same problem. I've only ever been told joint accounts are a bad idea, but with so few stay-at-homes now it doesn't really look like it'll be too much of a problem in the future. Where he used "most women" it probably should have been "anybody" though.


Yes this was my main issue. I don't think I'd marry someone I didn't trust with my money though!!!

I just hate shopping. I hate it when people imply I like it because of my gender -_-
Original post by Enoxial
I have to agree with them, not because I'm a male but because I have a good know how of business.

Example: (Real research)

Spoiler



Errrm was this meant for me?
Reply 26
Original post by Huskaris
He's correct, women get sucked in the same way children get sucked in by adverts showing toys.


To be honest, so do we. Just not nearly as frequently because it tends to be cars and expensive gaming systems or computers.
Reply 27
Original post by Huskaris
He's correct, women get sucked in the same way children get sucked in by adverts showing toys.


And men get sucked in by adverts showing cars and tools. Amiright????
Reply 28
Original post by redferry
And men get sucked in by adverts showing cars and tools. Amiright????


Yes. But the difference is cars are a lot less impulse buying, you tend to sit down and talk before you buy a car (not always granted)

But a few pairs of shoes and dresses here and there can comfortably add up to the same amount but without any real consultation with your other half.
Reply 29
Original post by Huskaris
Yes. But the difference is cars are a lot less impulse buying, you tend to sit down and talk before you buy a car (not always granted)

But a few pairs of shoes and dresses here and there can comfortably add up to the same amount but without any real consultation with your other half.


Probably only adds up to about the same as a season ticket to the football.

And less than a gambling habit.
She is not your child/pet?

A relationship is not about the house is 'mine', the money is 'mine', heres £20 go and get the groceries?

Its about trust and sharing?
Reply 31
You provide enough money for the costs of running the house and family, and then you work out how much money you're allowing yourself to have available for 'lifestyle' items (ie non-essentials), and you make sure she has the same amount to spend on non-essentials herself. I've been out of a job since 30th December and so we're surviving on my other half's income. Money is tight, but if he deems himself able to still afford, say, a computer game costing £30, he does not expect me to go without anything up to that amount. It's a joint enterprise, we support each other, regardless of who is bringing the money in at any given point in time.

Edit: The post above this has reminded me: looking after 'my house and my kids'... sounds like you should be paying her a salary on top of paying for the expenses, in that case, given that she's providing you with a service. I'm guessing you won't be able to afford that, so you might want to change your approach. :wink:
(edited 10 years ago)
Original post by Huskaris
Yes. But the difference is cars are a lot less impulse buying, you tend to sit down and talk before you buy a car (not always granted)

But a few pairs of shoes and dresses here and there can comfortably add up to the same amount but without any real consultation with your other half.


My friend's dad went to work in their normal family car one day and came home in a Porsche.

My own dad doesn't care about shoes or clothes but every now and then he'll make a big purchase like a new laptop or TV. Or a suit (which costs over £300).

My mum buys little and often, an item of clothing here and there. The actual amount spent by both is probably similar, it's just that men tend to do it all at once.

So can we please stop all these "men are better than women" threads? :rolleyes:
This isn't the 1950's! If a partner ever suggested such a situation to me, I would be gone straight away!

I want to earn my own money, have independence and have an equal relationship with trust!

not treated like a little kid being given pocket money!
Original post by Peace&Love
She is not your child/pet?

A relationship is not about the house is 'mine', the money is 'mine', heres £20 go and get the groceries?

Its about trust and sharing?


I get what you are saying but not in my household , Im very traditional .
& Surely someone with your obvious intellect and capabilities as a 'man' should be able to work out the money she would need on a weekly basis to buy all the item you have listed?
Original post by theoferdinand
I get what you are saying but not in my household , Im very traditional .


But what you are outlining presents you as very much the dictator and is in fact very sexist, do you not agree?
Original post by redferry
Hahaha you are so unbelievably sexist!


Not sexist maybe a minute generalization but for the most part as others have said hes right .
Reply 38
Original post by theoferdinand
Not sexist maybe a minute generalization but for the most part as others have said hes right .


So you wouldn't find it sexist if I said to another girl don't trust a man with a joint account hell just gamble and drink all the money away?
Reply 39
Original post by Peace&Love
This isn't the 1950's! If a partner ever suggested such a situation to me, I would be gone straight away!

I want to earn my own money, have independence and have an equal relationship with trust!

not treated like a little kid being given pocket money!

But she doesn't earn her own money. That isn't his fault.

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