Girls or boys? Who pays?
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Original post by Top Queen
I could never have a second date with someone who didn't pay for the first or any other after that.
People like different types of relationship. You sound like you like the 'traditional' gender roles of male provider/female caregiver.
That's your choice, but thankfully society is moving to a more enlightened future where women aren't chattel for men to woo and then control financially.
I like my women strong and independent. It's the 21st century.
(edited 10 years ago)
Original post by CodeQ
This is exactly the kind of relationship I would like. Not because I can't pay for myself, but I would like a guy to insist. I just think it's really hot when a guy doesn't want his girlfriend to pay a penny. Although, it's not a determining factor, it would just be a bonus. And when I'm talking about paying, I mean things we do together as a couple.
This is exactly how I feel, finally somebody understands!!!!!
I don't see any logical reason why boys should pay more, but tbh, due to convention, it will look bad if the guy doesn't offer to pay. Not very fair, but that's just the way things are.
I had thought guys paid in the past because girls didn't earn their own salary (dunno how true that is though). Whereas girls can work and earn money now, so that reason is obsolete.
I had thought guys paid in the past because girls didn't earn their own salary (dunno how true that is though). Whereas girls can work and earn money now, so that reason is obsolete.
Most of the time I pay for my girlfriend but she does offer and sometimes she refuses to let me pay for all of it. I don't think the guy should pay every single time but it is the 'gentlemanly' thing to do I suppose.
Original post by Chief Wiggum
I don't see any logical reason why boys should pay more, but tbh, due to convention, it will look bad if the guy doesn't offer to pay. Not very fair, but that's just the way things are.
I had thought guys paid in the past because girls didn't earn their own salary (dunno how true that is though). Whereas girls can work and earn money now, so that reason is obsolete.
I had thought guys paid in the past because girls didn't earn their own salary (dunno how true that is though). Whereas girls can work and earn money now, so that reason is obsolete.
Tbh, it's not just me. All my friends think less of a boy when he can't pay most of the time. A friend of my sister actually broke up with her fiancé because she was fed up of him not being able to pay more of the time..
Top Queen, just out of interest...
Say your partner says to you "I'm just going to the toilet, here's the cash, can you go up and pay?"
Would you do it, or would you insist he did it when he came back?
Is him actually carrying out the action also important to you?
Say your partner says to you "I'm just going to the toilet, here's the cash, can you go up and pay?"
Would you do it, or would you insist he did it when he came back?
Is him actually carrying out the action also important to you?
Original post by Top Queen
Tbh, it's not just me. All my friends think less of a boy when he can't pay most of the time. A friend of my sister actually broke up with her fiancé because she was fed up of him not being able to pay more of the time..
Haha, surely this is a troll.
Original post by Anonymous Coward
Top Queen, just out of interest...
Say your partner says to you "I'm just going to the toilet, here's the cash, can you go up and pay?"
Would you do it, or would you insist he did it when he came back?
Is him actually carrying out the action also important to you?
Say your partner says to you "I'm just going to the toilet, here's the cash, can you go up and pay?"
Would you do it, or would you insist he did it when he came back?
Is him actually carrying out the action also important to you?
Oh no, most the time he hands his wallet over to me anyway, he never takes bags and once he lost both our wallets and so we were stuck so now he just gives it to me, but I prefer him to pay because it is his money, I'd feel a bit like I'm cheating him if I always went around using his money to make me look good lol.
Original post by Top Queen
Tbh, it's not just me. All my friends think less of a boy when he can't pay most of the time. A friend of my sister actually broke up with her fiancé because she was fed up of him not being able to pay more of the time..
Yeah, sure... It took her that long to realise?
Original post by Chief Wiggum
Haha, surely this is a troll.
What's a troll?
Original post by Anonymous Coward
Yeah, sure... It took her that long to realise?
It didn't, they got engaged after 10 months but still, I can get unto a boy like that on the first date, I guess she just hoped he would change.
My boyfriend pays for most things. However I'm a student whilst he works full time and is on a pretty good wage, so he has far more spare money than I do. I do insist on paying for somethings when we go out though e,g. a couple round of drinks, cab fare or cinema tickets; I'd feel like a scrounger if I didn't. When I was single and used to go on dates I'd always offer to pay half, only one guy took me up on this though.
Original post by Superunknown17
Most of the time I pay for my girlfriend but she does offer and sometimes she refuses to let me pay for all of it. I don't think the guy should pay every single time but it is the 'gentlemanly' thing to do I suppose.
You ou sound like my boyfriend haha. I love guys like you.
Original post by Top Queen
Tbh, it's not just me. All my friends think less of a boy when he can't pay most of the time. A friend of my sister actually broke up with her fiancé because she was fed up of him not being able to pay more of the time..
There we go.
You've not got a problem with men who can pay but won't pay. You've got a problem with men who struggle to pay.
Nobody(decent) with money's going to go with a girl who's poor just because she's good looking, when there are plenty of women who have money, who are good looking.
Paying bills isn't a big priority.
I prefer going 50/50 to be honest, I find it's more fairer in my opinion..
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Original post by Top Queen
Tbh, it's not just me. All my friends think less of a boy when he can't pay most of the time. A friend of my sister actually broke up with her fiancé because she was fed up of him not being able to pay more of the time..
She probably did him a favour.
Original post by Scott.
There we go.
You've not got a problem with men who can pay but won't pay. You've got a problem with men who struggle to pay.
Nobody(decent) with money's going to go with a girl who's poor just because she's good looking, when there are plenty of women who have money, who are good looking.
Paying bills isn't a big priority.
You've not got a problem with men who can pay but won't pay. You've got a problem with men who struggle to pay.
Nobody(decent) with money's going to go with a girl who's poor just because she's good looking, when there are plenty of women who have money, who are good looking.
Paying bills isn't a big priority.
No actually, I have a problem more with men who CAN pay and won't. If someone doesn't have the money to pay then it isn't really their fault, but then I'd have to always pay and I don't feel as a female I should.
Original post by So Instinct
She probably did him a favour.
No, a girl just deserves better in this world!
Given that this is primarily about relationships, it is not the responsibility of either party to pay for all, or even most. Dates and the like should be roughly half and half; for general nights out both parties should pay for their own drinks unless there is some special arrangement such as one pays for drinks the other a taxi, say; and presents obviously like anybody else, you pay for your own gifts (since at that age that is probably what would be happening, and even if parents still pay for most really for ones partner ones own money should be used).
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Posted from TSR Mobile
We're in an LDR and train tickets to see each other are usually around 30 quid, so we have a rule where we take it in turns to visit each other and whoever is hosting pays for everything we do that weekend because the other person has already spent money on the train ticket.
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