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Reply 20
Original post by fojodef
ive noticed with nigerian girls yoruba lie a lot. whereas i've noticed igbo girls/general biafra region are a lot more cool albeit quirky. spoke to one edo girl and she was basically schizophrenic with how if i asked her a question about edo she started off telling me and then half way through her explanation got hostile with me like i had taken some unspoken agenda against edo people for not knowing about them and she kinda just started winding herself up without any input from me.

i got to say i think skin bleaching is the worst thing.
i dont really feel comfortable dating a girl with relaxed hair.
i know its suppose to be easier to comb but im friends with girls that really know their stuff about black girls hair and the different varieties of it and they tell me its all lies and they they just dont know how to look after their natural hair. i've dated girls with natural hair and it took them exactly the same time if not faster to get ready in the morning.

definitely not dating a girl who puts weave in her hair. its not attractive to feel during an passionate kiss. and the hair becomes a bit of an obsession and it becomes weird. i also find it a bit sad that they'd pay money to have another races hair in their head.

then theres the skin bleaching which is just awful and im totally against.
its nothing like tanning. a white person can walk outside and get a tan naturally. its natural to tan. some black people naturally go a bit paler in european climates during the winter (especially ones with mixed polyracial backgrounds) but skin bleaching is not natural and it damages skin severely or does not work.

i got to say i've spent a few of my younger years dating these girls with their issues. and they will swear they dont have any. but actions speak louder than words. and the discussions always end up with a hostile end with no resolve and just "you dont know you dont understand" or its everyone elses fault but theirs for not loving who they naturally are. its just all too much. so thats why im only dating girls who are proud of themselves who dont try to make themselves look racially ambiguous.

this


is not attractive.



Well i agree with you on the weave part, although, i am guilty.

On the hair topic though, natural hair is hard to handle, although it can be handled, but most black girls like taking the easy way out, which isn't necessarily a bad thing. As far as I'm concerned, i just need my hair to grow out a bit more then i can focus on it. But you should understand, although taking care of our natural hair is possible, its way more complicated then that the average non african hair, unless the black girl is mixed or something, i would know, i kept my hair short (Not almost bald short) for the whole time in high school where i watched my mates slave over their hairs.

On the skin bleaching topic, again its your opinion, but there are natural means (at least from what I've seen with the girls in my a-level college) to bleach/lighten, lemon and such.

Lol! you said the edo girl u met was schizophrenic, gosh, where do you meet these people, well the only thing ill have to say about that is you can't use one person or ten people to judge an entire group. Im an Edo Nigerian, lived in Nigeria 16 years of my life, and most people find that hard to believe.

Im the kind of person that gets to know a person before i can make a judgement, although i can be biased sometimes myself
Reply 21
Original post by TitanicTeutonicPhil
(1) Caucasian, preferably from North America, central, western, and northern Europe
(2) All other races, with Black and South Asian leading the pack
(3) Unattractive. Do not like very dark skin and wide noses. Often from not-so-well-off and unsophisticated backgrounds so incompatible with my lifestyle and family/circle of friends
(4) Yes - for the above reasons


Alright. Thanks
Forgotten the list but I go for white girls, would like to go for black girls but don't because of attitude/racist families. Meeting her family would be the most terrifying day of my life.
Reply 23
Original post by Rlove95
Those that say they don't like black girls because they all have big noses and are too dark are just 'out of their comfort zone'? :rolleyes: I'm not denying the fact that people like what they are comfortable with but there are a lot of people out there that look down on black girls and treat black girls like they are inferior. You only have to go on a few black girl TSR threads to see that.

Just look at the above post ^


If you look beside the name of the person in the above post the has red gems rather than green which I've interpreted as having a bad reputation on TSR, i could be wrong, and if i am, so what it his opinion, not everyone is going to like you cause your black, the same way some people don't like muslims or paskis or israeli people cause of were they are from, and the reason they don't like them is they did not grow up in their environment and a few nuts have ton ahead to make em look bad. If a dude won't date you cause he prefers a lighter skin then its what he wants, its not racsim, heck i know many black boys that prefer light skins, and many japanese guys that prefer black girls.

I honestly don't thin i can convince you otherwise, its your opinion, moulded by your owns experiences, I'm simple a researcher, telling you what i have learnt.
Original post by fojodef
i kinda thought it was a given that i was generalising.

im talking from experience. does not have to be accurate. maybe my experiences are abnormally unlucky.

two zimbabweans i've known (both shona) have been cheating with multiple men 4-5 at the same time.


Well that's extreme:s-smilie:.

I don't really hang around in the Zimbabwean community (most of my friends are Nigerian) but from the Zimbabweans I know, some cheat, a lot don't. Yeah I'm shona too and I don't know any non-shona Zimbabweans. I think its usually Zimbabwean men that cheat, they are always having so many baby mamas.
(edited 9 years ago)
Reply 25
Original post by Huskaris
Forgotten the list but I go for white girls, would like to go for black girls but don't because of attitude/racist families. Meeting her family would be the most terrifying day of my life.


Lol, i get that :biggrin:
Original post by Sopheea
If you look beside the name of the person in the above post the has red gems rather than green which I've interpreted as having a bad reputation on TSR, i could be wrong, and if i am, so what it his opinion, not everyone is going to like you cause your black, the same way some people don't like muslims or paskis or israeli people cause of were they are from, and the reason they don't like them is they did not grow up in their environment and a few nuts have ton ahead to make em look bad. If a dude won't date you cause he prefers a lighter skin then its what he wants, its not racsim, heck i know many black boys that prefer light skins, and many japanese guys that prefer black girls.

I honestly don't thin i can convince you otherwise, its your opinion, moulded by your owns experiences, I'm simple a researcher, telling you what i have learnt.


My argument isn't against preferences, my argument is against portraying a race as inferior. It might not be their fault that they grew up in a racist enviroment but that doesn't stop them from being racist. You can prefer white girls, prefer light skin but you shouldn't now start calling black girls names and insulting them just because they don't fit your preference. That guy hasn't actually said anything new, I've seen so many posts from guys on TSR along the same lines, even guys with green gems (if they even mean anything nowadays)

Yeah I don't think you could convince me otherwise.
Wouldnt mind going for a guy of any race as long as hes muslim
Reply 28
Original post by Sopheea
Well i agree with you on the weave part, although, i am guilty.

On the hair topic though, natural hair is hard to handle, although it can be handled, but most black girls like taking the easy way out, which isn't necessarily a bad thing. As far as I'm concerned, i just need my hair to grow out a bit more then i can focus on it. But you should understand, although taking care of our natural hair is possible, its way more complicated then that the average non african hair, unless the black girl is mixed or something, i would know, i kept my hair short (Not almost bald short) for the whole time in high school where i watched my mates slave over their hairs.

On the skin bleaching topic, again its your opinion, but there are natural means (at least from what I've seen with the girls in my a-level college) to bleach/lighten, lemon and such.

Lol! you said the edo girl u met was schizophrenic, gosh, where do you meet these people, well the only thing ill have to say about that is you can't use one person or ten people to judge an entire group. Im an Edo Nigerian, lived in Nigeria 16 years of my life, and most people find that hard to believe.

Im the kind of person that gets to know a person before i can make a judgement, although i can be biased sometimes myself


I've always had the suspicion that having weave/relaxed hair was more a thing to do with maturity. for example commonly i only ever see black children with natural hair whilst their mother often has weave/relaxed hair.

and then it seems to be around adolescence that the weave/relaxer comes in.

so i just kinda guessed that the mother acts as a role model of womanhood for girls to aspire to and so they aspire to have hair like the mom. even if the moms natural the other girls at school plus noticing all the other women will must influence them.

i seriously find it hard to believe that rubbing lemon juice on you will stop your skin producing melanin. i think your friends are just scared you'll find out their bleaching or dont want to give away what they consider to be "beauty secrets"

as for the edo girl. yea as i said she was just the one girl. lol when i told me friend (Ijaw) seemed to be like "ahhh yes... she is just pissed because they used to be very powerful and are now very small... i understand why shes angry" dunno if he's just s**t stirring or if that that kinda gossip rivalry is true tho lol
Reply 29
Original post by Rlove95
My argument isn't against preferences, my argument is against portraying a race as inferior. It might not be their fault that they grew up in a racist enviroment but that doesn't stop them from being racist. You can prefer white girls, prefer light skin but you shouldn't now start calling black girls names and insulting them just because they don't fit your preference. That guy hasn't actually said anything new, I've seen so many posts from guys on TSR along the same lines, even guys with green gems (if they even mean anything nowadays)

Yeah I don't think you could convince me otherwise.


Ok, he is one person though, and if you really want to see how people white and black would react to that, ask him to say it louder in a public place, I've seen it happen so many times, the same way people like him generalise is the same way you have by thinking all whites or many whites try to make blacks inferior, i believe many blacks have an inferiority complex, and thats just it. my opinion.

Anyhow, its alright. Thanks
Original post by Sopheea
Well i agree with you on the weave part, although, i am guilty.

On the hair topic though, natural hair is hard to handle, although it can be handled, but most black girls like taking the easy way out, which isn't necessarily a bad thing. As far as I'm concerned, i just need my hair to grow out a bit more then i can focus on it. But you should understand, although taking care of our natural hair is possible, its way more complicated then that the average non african hair, unless the black girl is mixed or something, i would know, i kept my hair short (Not almost bald short) for the whole time in high school where i watched my mates slave over their hairs.

On the skin bleaching topic, again its your opinion, but there are natural means (at least from what I've seen with the girls in my a-level college) to bleach/lighten, lemon and such.

Lol! you said the edo girl u met was schizophrenic, gosh, where do you meet these people, well the only thing ill have to say about that is you can't use one person or ten people to judge an entire group. Im an Edo Nigerian, lived in Nigeria 16 years of my life, and most people find that hard to believe.

Im the kind of person that gets to know a person before i can make a judgement, although i can be biased sometimes myself


Yeah I completely agree with the natural hair thing. Its incredibly difficult to manage. I tried to go natural and it just flopped so badly. I prefer weave, easier to manage, looks nicer on me and means I can experiment with different hairstyles. Black girls aren't the only girls who wear weave, its just more obvious when black girls do it.
Yeah **** weave.
I would definitely date a girl that has weave because i like black gyals but by the time we get serious that weave is coming off and there will be absolutely no debate on that matter.
Anyway
Im nigerian so the way i see it is My wife will probably be nigerian or african atleast
Having an african wife >>>>>>>
Having a caribbean girlfriend/mistress/play thing >>>>>>
(edited 9 years ago)
Reply 32
Original post by fojodef
I've always had the suspicion that having weave/relaxed hair was more a thing to do with maturity. for example commonly i only ever see black children with natural hair whilst their mother often has weave/relaxed hair.

and then it seems to be around adolescence that the weave/relaxer comes in.

so i just kinda guessed that the mother acts as a role model of womanhood for girls to aspire to and so they aspire to have hair like the mom. even if the moms natural the other girls at school plus noticing all the other women will must influence them.

i seriously find it hard to believe that rubbing lemon juice on you will stop your skin producing melanin. i think your friends are just scared you'll find out their bleaching or dont want to give away what they consider to be "beauty secrets"

as for the edo girl. yea as i said she was just the one girl. lol when i told me friend (Ijaw) seemed to be like "ahhh yes... she is just pissed because they used to be very powerful and are now very small... i understand why shes angry" dunno if he's just s**t stirring or if that that kinda gossip rivalry is true tho lol


Lol i can't even get to that, i find the tribal rival stuff stupid.

Maybe you're right, but as far as i know, most girls like to experiment with their bodies, its not necessarily confidence issue :smile:
Reply 33
Original post by Rlove95
Well that's extreme:s-smilie:.

I don't really hang around in the Zimbabwean community (most of my friends are Nigerian) but from the Zimbabweans I know, some cheat, a lot don't. Yeah I'm shona too and I don't know any non-shona Zimbabweans. I think its usually Zimbabwean men that cheat, they are always having so many baby mamas.


well i hope theyre the exception i've always been intrigued by Zimbabweans i think Zimbabwe's a really interesting country as its kinda the only african state to have a leader who isnt a puppet to NATO. hence him getting on the wrong side of NATo, hence the embargo. but i think Zimbabwe's done an amazing job at surviving and starting to climb back up after the devastating sanctions put on it. i do worry about what will happen when mugabe leaves though.
Original post by Sopheea
Ok, he is one person though, and if you really want to see how people white and black would react to that, ask him to say it louder in a public place, I've seen it happen so many times, the same way people like him generalise is the same way you have by thinking all whites or many whites try to make blacks inferior, i believe many blacks have an inferiority complex, and thats just it. my opinion.

Anyhow, its alright. Thanks


I never said all whites or many whites try to make blacks inferior. I definitely don't think that. I don't think black people have an inferiority complex since many people are proud to be black (including myself) but I think black people are just very sensitive, since they've been treated as inferior for such a long time and in some cases still are. Look at the treatment of black girls by society. Only black girls who have eurocentric features are deemed beautiful e.g Beyonce, Rihanna etc. When some magazine called Lupita Nyong'o the most beautiful person award, everyone went crazy just because she doesn't fit the western ideal of beauty (light skin, small nose etc), look at the amount of black men in prison, not because they commit more crimes but because they are more likely to be prosecuted by a judge than a white person. Its not all rosy like people make out. It isn't terrible, the world has improved drastically but racism still exists. The other day some randomer called me a ****** when I was walking down the street, stuff like that shouldn't happen in 2014.
Reply 35
Original post by Sopheea
Lol i can't even get to that, i find the tribal rival stuff stupid.

Maybe you're right, but as far as i know, most girls like to experiment with their bodies, its not necessarily confidence issue :smile:


thats cool
just curious, do you lighten your skin?
Reply 36
Original post by Rlove95
I never said all whites or many whites try to make blacks inferior. I definitely don't think that. I don't think black people have an inferiority complex since many people are proud to be black (including myself) but I think black people are just very sensitive, since they've been treated as inferior for such a long time and in some cases still are. Look at the treatment of black girls by society. Only black girls who have eurocentric features are deemed beautiful e.g Beyonce, Rihanna etc. When some magazine called Lupita Nyong'o the most beautiful person award, everyone went crazy just because she doesn't fit the western ideal of beauty (light skin, small nose etc), look at the amount of black men in prison, not because they commit more crimes but because they are more likely to be prosecuted by a judge than a white person. Its not all rosy like people make out. It isn't terrible, the world has improved drastically but racism still exists. The other day some randomer called me a ****** when I was walking down the street, stuff like that shouldn't happen in 2014.

I actually did research on black men in prison and the amount of black men sent to jail on false charges, for the former, its high cause most of these people at least in th uk, are either born into poverty and stealing for a living, or are fraud involved people, or are teenager who were either caught with drugs or caught in a gang involved crime, for the latter, there percentage of falsely accused black men is less than that of white, at least in the 2013 statistics
Original post by fojodef
well i hope theyre the exception i've always been intrigued by Zimbabweans i think Zimbabwe's a really interesting country as its kinda the only african state to have a leader who isnt a puppet to NATO. hence him getting on the wrong side of NATo, hence the embargo. but i think Zimbabwe's done an amazing job at surviving and starting to climb back up after the devastating sanctions put on it. i do worry about what will happen when mugabe leaves though.


I hope so too. Yeah I think it's an interesting country too :smile: I don't know whether I agree with the rest though. I dislike Mugabe with a passion, I feel he's ruined the country. He could have been like Nelson Mandela but he decided to go all tyrannical. I don't know a lot about whats happening in Zimbabwe but from what I do know and from what my relatives there say, there is quite a lot of corruption there. I think the sooner he leaves the better.
Reply 38
Original post by fojodef
thats cool
just curious, do you lighten your skin?


Nah, im lazy af, dealing with my hair is stressful enough besides I'm a nice kind of brown so i don't feel its necessary
Original post by Sopheea
I actually did research on black men in prison and the amount of black men sent to jail on false charges, for the former, its high cause most of these people at least in th uk, are either born into poverty and stealing for a living, or are fraud involved people, or are teenager who were either caught with drugs or caught in a gang involved crime, for the latter, there percentage of falsely accused black men is less than that of white, at least in the 2013 statistics


Oh really? I didn't know that. I'm not surprised really though, there seems to be quite a lot of injustice in the justice system.

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