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I love my boyfriend but I'm being tempted by other men

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How old is your boyfriend, doesn't he satisfy you sexually. Have you ever considered maybe asking him for permission to get screwed by the other guy maybe if he is open minded enough.
Original post by WelshBluebird
Err I can assure you I have been in long term relationships.
And if she is seriously considering cheating, and has gone so far as she'd be quite happy to do this other guy then go back to her boyfriend (essentially having her cake and eating it) then she really needs to think seriously about leaving because the bf deserves a hell of a lot better.


I said "most", and therefore wasn't targeting you.

You can't tell a stranger on the internet how they feel, which is why I posed questions to her so she can work it out for herself. Relationships and emotions are much more complex than "Attracted to someone else? You're an evil loveless whore!"

There is also an enormous difference between considering/fantasising about something and actually going ahead with it.
I bet if it was a guy who wanted to cheat on his girlfriend with an older woman who had a child and a life of her own, then TSR would be all in for lynching him.


OP it sounds like a lust problem you have the way i see it is like this;

1) You decide to go for it, cheat on ur bf with the other guy (assuming he'll have you) and you have a nice time of it and then immediately regret cheating on your BF

2) Decide to stay with your BF, but cheat on your BF without him knowing and then the guilt will tear you apart (or not)

3) Sort your priorities out and find out what you really want. 20 is young for a relationship and if you wanna sleep with that other guy, then by all means go for it, but at least break up with your boyfriend first before subjecting him to that kind of humiliation and destruction of confidence.


Best of luck.
You can flirt within a relationship but not take the initiative. That means he will have to make the move on you. If he for example kisses you, that will give you the opportunity to get some measure of him sexually without betraying your boyfriend.

I expect you do not love your boyfriend and were just intoxicated by the idea of going out with an older guy with a family while you were a student. And now the novelty is wearing off and you are realising that older men are less James Bond and more Homer Simpson.

Agree with the poster above that there is a double standard of gender here and love the way the OP presents herself as passive (being tempted by other men, naturally...)
(edited 9 years ago)
Original post by scrotgrot
You can flirt within a relationship but not take the initiative. That means he will have to make the move on you. If he for example kisses you, that will give you the opportunity to get some measure of him sexually without betraying your boyfriend.

I expect you do not love your boyfriend and were just intoxicated by the idea of going out with an older guy with a family while you were a student. And now the novelty is wearing off and you are realising that older men are less James Bond and more Homer Simpson.


"You can flirt within a relationship but not take the initiative. That means he will have to make the move on you. If he for example kisses you, that will give you the opportunity to get some measure of him sexually without betraying your boyfriend."

I am sorry, I would still classify that as "betraying your(her) boyfriend".
These hoes ain't loyal. Probably getting a card for this but it's so funny I don't care lmfao.
(edited 9 years ago)
Original post by scrotgrot
You can flirt within a relationship but not take the initiative. That means he will have to make the move on you. If he for example kisses you, that will give you the opportunity to get some measure of him sexually without betraying your boyfriend.

I expect you do not love your boyfriend and were just intoxicated by the idea of going out with an older guy with a family while you were a student. And now the novelty is wearing off and you are realising that older men are less James Bond and more Homer Simpson.

Agree with the poster above that there is a double standard of gender here and love the way the OP presents herself as passive (being tempted by other men, naturally...)


lol what? Speak for yourself. I'd leave if she did that to me.
Have a threesome at work.
Original post by Anonymous
I've been with my lovely, amazing boyfriend, who is also my best friend, for a year and 5 months. The thing is... I'm finding myself becoming increasingly tempted sexually by two other men.

The thing is, I see my boyfriend once a fortnight on average because he's quite busy, whereas I see the two other men I'm interested in almost every day because they're my colleagues. One of the other men I'm only slightly interested in, but the other one I'm finding irresistable, to be honest... and I see him all the time! Sometimes the temptation is so strong I feel like I'm gonna explode!

I'd love to try him out for one night and then return to my lovely boyfriend, who I do love very much, but I know relationships don't work like that.

The thing is, I'm not even sure it's gonna work long-term with my boyfriend. I'm 20 and he's an older guy with a daughter and his own busy life and honestly, I can't see all this reconciling for the better. But parting from my boyfriend would mean losing the best friend I ever had. What do I do?


Temptation is normal, but you would be stupid to try it on with a colleague. If this other guy is good enough to leave your boyfriend for, then I would recommend finding a new job as well.
Original post by scrotgrot
You can flirt within a relationship but not take the initiative. That means he will have to make the move on you. If he for example kisses you, that will give you the opportunity to get some measure of him sexually without betraying your boyfriend.


U wot m8
Original post by Jaegon Targaryen
Have a threesome at work.


In the workplace?
Original post by ChickenMadness
lol what? Speak for yourself. I'd leave if she did that to me.


So would I but it is a way for her to reduce her culpability while keeping her options open. Still unacceptable especially if deliberately planned or achieved through tempting him, but in my view much less bad than taking an active role in the flirtation and coming on to him.
Original post by scrotgrot
You can flirt within a relationship but not take the initiative. That means he will have to make the move on you. If he for example kisses you, that will give you the opportunity to get some measure of him sexually without betraying your boyfriend.


Lol... I think this is the worst piece of advice I've ever heard. This is most certainly a dump-able offence IMO... and from the posts above, many agree.
Original post by Acidy
you women.. always causing heartbreak and cheating on your loyal male partner


Men also do this pretty regularly.

And OP: I think you know what to do.


Posted from TSR Mobile
You've already made up your mind in your head.
Original post by WelshBluebird
Err I can assure you I have been in long term relationships.
And if she is seriously considering cheating, and has gone so far as she'd be quite happy to do this other guy then go back to her boyfriend (essentially having her cake and eating it) then she really needs to think seriously about leaving because the bf deserves a hell of a lot better.


I meant I was thinking about having a ONS with the guy from work with my boyfriend's permission and then returning to my boyfriend. It was a thought I knew couldn't be put into practice.
Original post by Coke Or Pepsi
Hmmm... kiddies....

OP, I suggest you do not ignore us 'kiddies' if you want your relationship with your boyfriend to work. It won't work if you cheat on him unless he forgives you, but you will destroy his confidence. If you loved him as much as you said you did, finding other people attractive would be on a superficial level rather than becoming an urge for you to sleep with them and having fantasies about them... Sort out your priorities or you'll hurt someone who you claim to care so much about.


I'm not gonna cheat on him! I meant in my OP that I found titillating the thought of having a ONS with the guy from work with my boyfriend's permission. I'm not actually gonna do it.
Sloths gunna sloth.
Original post by Aivicore
I said "most", and therefore wasn't targeting you.

You can't tell a stranger on the internet how they feel, which is why I posed questions to her so she can work it out for herself. Relationships and emotions are much more complex than "Attracted to someone else? You're an evil loveless whore!"

There is also an enormous difference between considering/fantasising about something and actually going ahead with it.


Thanks for all your advice, Aivicore :smile:
Original post by Anonymous
I'm not gonna cheat on him! I meant in my OP that I found titillating the thought of having a ONS with the guy from work with my boyfriend's permission. I'm not actually gonna do it.


He will not allow it. Even if he does allow it, he will have major trust issues afterwards and I can guarantee you that your relationship will collapse.

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