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Never proud

This is a weird question. I am never happy with myself or my achievements , I got an offer from oxford university for a masters and I'm still not proud of myself? Does anyone ever feel this way? Or is it cause I have no one to share it with? Like I don't have a bf or anything... Anyone ever feel this way? Is this depression? I'm never happy with myself.

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Original post by Abdul-Karim
You seem very selfish and unappreciative. It may however be depression, if that's even a real thing.


Selfish and unappreciative for not having one of the seven deadly sins? :colone:

OP, you should be proud of your modesty.
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Anonymous #1
OP
Original post by Abdul-Karim
You seem very selfish and unappreciative. It may however be depression, if that's even a real thing.

Please expand? I'm feeling really down about this. I feel down about the fact I can't be happy or proud of myself. Which part is selfish?
Getting into Oxford is fantastic. Try and be more lenient with yourself and look at the positives:smile:
I got a scholarship to go to an American uni but due to unforseeable circumstances, I couldn't go but I'm still happy of the achievement. Be happy!

Original post by Abdul-Karim
You seem very selfish and unappreciative. It may however be depression, if that's even a real thing.


Depression isn't real? :/
(edited 9 years ago)
Original post by Abdul-Karim
You seem very selfish and unappreciative. It may however be depression, if that's even a real thing.


That's actually insensitive Abdul, one of your only posts i disagree with..
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The_Smurf
Original post by Abdul-Karim
You seem very selfish and unappreciative. It may however be depression, if that's even a real thing.


What a ridiculous comment.
It is one symptom of depression, but if you have no others possibly not.
Could also be anxiety/lack of self confidence. However if this isn't affecting any other parts of your life I wouldn't worry too much.
Original post by Anonymous
Please expand? I'm feeling really down about this. I feel down about the fact I can't be happy or proud of myself. Which part is selfish?


Being proud of yourself and being happy are not the same thing. It's not a problem if you're not proud of your achievements, but if you're not happy with your life, that's different.
Original post by Abdul-Karim
I don't believe it to be a true condition. It's just people making complaining or making excuses, in my opinion.


Oh, well, since the all-knowing Abdul Karim doesn't think that depression is real I guess we can just stop treating those afflicted with the condition and tell them to grow a pair.
(edited 9 years ago)
Reply 8
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Stinkum
3
yeah same here
Original post by Abdul-Karim
I don't believe it to be a true condition. It's just people making complaining or making excuses, in my opinion.


There is brain imaging data and other empirical research which has definitely disproved this. You might argue that some people think they're clinically depressed when they are only a little down / reap what they sow, but the idea that depression as an illness isn't 'real' is no longer in any way scientifically viable.

Here is a great lecture on the subject by Robert Sapolsky, Stanford University. He goes so far as to say that medical depression is the worst of all possible illnesses, and he's in a position to know:

Original post by Abdul-Karim
You seem very selfish and unappreciative. It may however be depression, if that's even a real thing.


Aren't you really religious? And isn't pride considered bad in the vast majority of religions?
Original post by Anonymous
This is a weird question. I am never happy with myself or my achievements , I got an offer from oxford university for a masters and I'm still not proud of myself? Does anyone ever feel this way? Or is it cause I have no one to share it with? Like I don't have a bf or anything... Anyone ever feel this way? Is this depression? I'm never happy with myself.


I'm similar. You just have to find happiness externally - for me its my froends/, family and over all the natural world.
Because happiness never comes through academic or material achievements. It is about meaning and purpose through rich experiences and relationships.

Yes, relationships. I would never have known if someone asked me a few years ago. I wasted a large part of three years at university because I was too concentrated on academic performance and my career. I felt largely regret during my grad ceremony, despite achieving a first class honours.

Ask any human bring on the brink of death what they regret about their life. One that almost always comes up is that they didn't invest enough in their relationships and connecting with others.

I have 'achieved' quite a lot for someone my age (theoretically), however I am no more proud of myself than I was 10 years ago, perhaps just grateful.

There are too many factors that go into success. I know for a fact that a large part of mine has been down to influences that I didn't really choose or work for - intelligence, caring parents, intrinsic motivation etc etc.

Pride is for fools, gratitude is what really distinguishes the enlightened from the blind.
(edited 9 years ago)
Thank you for all your support. I had a really bad experience with a verbally and physically abusive relationship. I have no self confidence since.I'm
Wondering how a bad relationship would stop me being proud of myself? I went to see oxford today and , literally nothing. No feeling. No emotion. I was thinking about how lonely I will be when I start.
Original post by Anonymous
Thank you for all your support. I had a really bad experience with a verbally and physically abusive relationship. I have no self confidence since.I'm
Wondering how a bad relationship would stop me being proud of myself? I went to see oxford today and , literally nothing. No feeling. No emotion. I was thinking about how lonely I will be when I start.


Sounds like you might be suffering mental health wise as a result from your abusive relationship. Abusive relationships are physically and emotionally draining and have a lasting effect on a person. I'm very sorry you had to experience that, but very happy that you are out of it now.
I'd personally highly recommend CBT - the classes can take awhile to get into, however the help is available online so that you can start yourself.
The lonely thoughts are most likely depression, as is absence of any emotion.
My inbox is always open if you feel the need to talk, however I do advise mental health services, they've worked wonders.
Original post by Abdul-Karim
I don't believe it to be a true condition. It's just people making complaining or making excuses, in my opinion.


which is worth fob all when it stands against science.
Original post by Birkenhead



That's a really great video on depression. Makes me glad I have never been depressed. Sounds awful :/
Original post by Abdul-Karim
You seem very selfish and unappreciative. It may however be depression, if that's even a real thing.

if thats even a real thing?

hmm not helping your TSR PM voters here...
Original post by redferry
Aren't you really religious? And isn't pride considered bad in the vast majority of religions?


What does pride have to do with being unappreciative?

Original post by trustmeimlying1
if thats even a real thing?

hmm not helping your TSR PM voters here...


I'm still not convinced.
Original post by Abdul-Karim
What does pride have to do with being unappreciative?

.


OP said they never felt proud, you said they were unappreciative and selfish.

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