Guys: Would you ever approach a pretty girl who wears a hijab?

Original post by cobalion955

Go out with him? Why though? I mean you probably think I'm extreme, but I don't care what other people think, I have a sister to care about.

So I can get to know the kind of person hes like. Just to get to know what hea like. I wouldnt want to marry someone when I dont know them or what theyre like. They might not be the person for me etc once Ive got to them a bit better. I wouldnt have sex before marriage or anything like that though

Reply 62

Original post by Ribbit1234

Men can control their desires though? 98/ of them are not horny weird perveted creeps. Anyway I dont wear it for men or any reason to do with men. Like I said I wear it for myself. It's part of my identity and shows im a muslim and the kind of person I am. Just like goth people wear goth clothes. Im 19 started wearing it at 15

you're wrong, as a guy i can tell you 98% of guys think about sex 98% of the time, why do you feel the need to tell people you're muslim? the goth argument is silly a goths are essentially fundamentally weak members of society. the hijab was invented for men to not be turned on so when you wear one it actually promotes that which you hate. but whatever helps you sleep at night. if it makes you uncomfortable then yes, all men are nice and cuddly.

Reply 63

fishi

Original post by PostKeynesian

Yeh i would stay clear because that's a sign that they want to be good and pure and want someone islamic. But for some it is a veil and use that to hide behind their 'sins'. But no me being white i just have the idea in my head that there's no chance anyway. I know that's bad but that how i feel inside.

Well its not that they wear it to feel pure or hide behind their sins its basically a covering to cover your aurat. The body parts of women that make them look attractive. Their hair, their breasts and their hips..

Reply 64

Original post by Anonymous

This is what I plan on doing (when and if the time comes):

Be friends with the girl for 1-2 months and see if we click, it will be pretty obvious if I like her and if she likes me within that period.
Tell her that I like her and would like to continue getting to know her with the intention of marriage.
Spend around a year or two with her and then get parents involved.

Throughout this whole process there will be no touchy-touchy business. I know its not Islamic but... that's what I see myself doing.

This.

Reply 65

cobalion955

Original post by Ribbit1234

So I can get to know the kind of person hes like. Just to get to know what hea like. I wouldnt want to marry someone when I dont know them or what theyre like. They might not be the person for me etc once Ive got to them a bit better. I wouldnt have sex before marriage or anything like that though

But you do know that Islamically that isn't allowed right? And remember people stronger than us said that they won't commit zina, but ended up committing it in that process. And you can get to know them in a Halal way, just within the company of your parents.

Reply 66

Anonymous #2

Original post by cem101

you're wrong, as a guy i can tell you 98% of guys think about sex 98% of the time, why do you feel the need to tell people you're muslim? the goth argument is silly a goths are essentially fundamentally weak members of society. the hijab was invented for men to not be turned on so when you wear one it actually promotes that which you hate. but whatever helps you sleep at night. if it makes you uncomfortable then yes, all men are nice and cuddly.

You sir are a retard. I went out with a Muslim girl a year ago, I really liked her to the extent that I actually manned up and asked her out, when I was with her I rarely thought about sex and stuff like that, actually come to think of it I never once thought about sex when I was with her. We didn't touch each other or anything but things didn't work out to break up, I still like her unfortunately :frown:

Reply 67

Original post by Anonymous

You sir are a retard. I went out with a Muslim girl a year ago, I really liked her to the extent that I actually manned up and asked her out, when I was with her I rarely thought about sex and stuff like that, actually come to think of it I never once thought about sex when I was with her. We didn't touch each other or anything but things didn't work out to break up, I still like her unfortunately :frown:

the reason you didn't is because muslim girls have this stereotype of being very unprovocative, somewhat off limits. but whatever man, the hijab only supports the purpose it was created for and people don't even see it, it doesn't show you're identity, it closes you up (literally)

Reply 68

Original post by cem101

you're wrong, as a guy i can tell you 98% of guys think about sex 98% of the time, why do you feel the need to tell people you're muslim? the goth argument is silly a goths are essentially fundamentally weak members of society. the hijab was invented for men to not be turned on so when you wear one it actually promotes that which you hate. but whatever helps you sleep at night. if it makes you uncomfortable then yes, all men are nice and cuddly.

Cuz it shows what kind of beleifs I have . showing that youre a muslim girl just by wearing a hijab alone can speak volumes idiot.
It was not invented not to turn men on? Men should be lowering their gaze anyway and so should women. You can get a pretty hijabi who dresses herself and presents herself well next to scruffy chav (non hijabi) who. Which would any men non muslim or muslim like better. Its not just about covering your hair. Youre getting it all wrong. Islam doesn't say to a woman to try amd uglyfy themselves as much as they can. In the olden days women used to.wear long hijabs which they used to wear over their heads covering their boobs too for modesty.

Reply 69

Original post by Ribbit1234

Cuz it shows what kind of beleifs I have . showing that youre a muslim girl just by wearing a hijab alone can speak volumes idiot.
It was not invented not to turn men on? Men should be lowering their gaze anyway and so should women. You can get a pretty hijabi who dresses herself and presents herself well next to scruffy chav (non hijabi) who. Which would any men non muslim or muslim like better. Its not just about covering your hair. Youre getting it all wrong. Islam doesn't say to a woman to try amd uglyfy themselves as much as they can. In the olden days women used to.wear long hijabs which they used to wear over their heads covering their boobs too for modesty.

wow, clearly as a muslim you've never read the quran, pleas eco so before talking. the quran doesn't say anything about how you should 'uglyfy' but it says a woman should cover up anything which could appeal to men. this is why you cover up.

Reply 70

Annii

As long as you are not committing zina (sexual intercourse) and anything major related to it, and your intentions are pure I don't see anything wrong with getting to know someone properly and then asking them for marriage?

Islam tells us in a way that we should not mess around (go out with loads of people, jump from one to the next, not taking any of it serious) but rather be serious when in love with the intention of marrying that person. As long as your intentions are good there is nothing wrong with getting to know someone on your own before introducing them to parents. Not aiming this at ANYONE but all i want to say is please stop making rules of your own that you think Islam teaches us and focus on what exactly Islam says people :smile:

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Reply 71

Original post by cobalion955

But you do know that Islamically that isn't allowed right? And remember people stronger than us said that they won't commit zina, but ended up committing it in that process. And you can get to know them in a Halal way, just within the company of your parents.

Yes I know that Islamically its probably haraam. But thats just the way it is these days since its the 21st century and were living in britain. Unless your parents introduce you to someone and with them knowing youre getting to know each other. But I wouldnt want to marry someone through my parents suggestions and approval. They're idea of a potential partner would be totally different to mine and it would be weird as well. Is that how you plan on going about it? Wouldn't it be a bit awkward though? Do you not mind your parents choosing someone for you?

Reply 72

Anonymous #2

Original post by Ribbit1234

Cuz it shows what kind of beleifs I have . showing that youre a muslim girl just by wearing a hijab alone can speak volumes idiot.
It was not invented not to turn men on? Men should be lowering their gaze anyway and so should women. You can get a pretty hijabi who dresses herself and presents herself well next to scruffy chav (non hijabi) who. Which would any men non muslim or muslim like better. Its not just about covering your hair. Youre getting it all wrong. Islam doesn't say to a woman to try amd uglyfy themselves as much as they can. In the olden days women used to.wear long hijabs which they used to wear over their heads covering their boobs too for modesty.

You're currently at university right?

Reply 73

Original post by cem101

wow, clearly as a muslim you've never read the quran, pleas eco so before talking. the quran doesn't say anything about how you should 'uglyfy' but it says a woman should cover up anything which could appeal to men. this is why you cover up.

Ive studied the quran. And went to an Islamic faith school so hush. Exactly it says you should present yourself well and modestly. Not to appeal to men so that they dont look at you or treat you like a sex object but rather respect you for who you are. Im done debating with you. You need to go and read the reasoning behind things rather than just know and state them.

Reply 74

cobalion955

Original post by Ribbit1234

Yes I know that Islamically its probably haraam. But thats just the way it is these days since its the 21st century and were living in britain. Unless your parents introduce you to someone and with them knowing youre getting to know each other. But I wouldnt want to marry someone through my parents suggestions and approval. They're idea of a potential partner would be totally different to mine and it would be weird as well. Is that how you plan on going about it? Wouldn't it be a bit awkward though? Do you not mind your parents choosing someone for you?

Probably? It is, though most Muslims in our generation hate that it is. I don't know why though And saying the '21st century' line just implies that you view the Islamic method of getting married as outdated. That's unfortunate to hear. And my parents didn't choose for me. I found the most beautiful Hijabi at University and I'm going to ask for her parents contact details.

Reply 75

Original post by Anonymous

You're currently at university right?

Yes why

Reply 76

Original post by Ribbit1234

Ive studied the quran. And went to an Islamic faith school so hush. Exactly it says you should present yourself well and modestly. Not to appeal to men so that they dont look at you or treat you like a sex object but rather respect you for who you are. Im done debating with you. You need to go and read the reasoning behind things rather than just know and state them.

as i said earlier, don't just go with what you're told, the hijab does more harm than good.

Reply 77

RobDeleu

No, I don't think so. And yes, you can't, unless you're married, I think.

Reply 78

Anonymous #2

Original post by cobalion955

Probably? It is, though most Muslims in our generation hate that it is. I don't know why though And saying the '21st century' line just implies that you view the Islamic method of getting married as outdated. That's unfortunate to hear. And my parents didn't choose for me. I found the most beautiful Hijabi at University and I'm going to ask for her parents contact details.

Don't you think thats a bit shallow though? the ONLY reason you want to marry her is because of her looks, as you said you've only spoken to her briefly. However, I wish you the best of luck :smile:

Reply 79