Terrified to go back to university after loosing friends and boyfriend from breakup?

My ex and friends were in the same social circle. We all lived together, and all had a house for next year. Out the blue I got dumped and I really liked this guy. My friends all ditched me too because they couldn't be assed to deal with the tension between the two of us. I had to find a new house and I have no friends and most of all no partner anymore. I used to be really social, went to loads of parties with these close friends and Ex. I did basically everything with my ex. I feel so sick to my stomach and don't want to return to University. I think I might drop out. It has been 3 months and I am still feeling this intense pain. Please tell me going back has a purpose? I don't want to ever go back there.. I don't know whether I will make party friends so social again, or whether I will ever be not depressed again. I've became severely depressed as well, I had the best memories with these people and suddenly they all left me out in the cold. Literally... I was forcefully kicked out of the tower I lived in with my ex and had to find a new home. None of these friends bothered to contact me when I was depressed or even help me. I feel horrible. I didn't even cause any drama with them. I was just depressed because I got dumped and all they did was leave me.

My ex and friends were in the same social circle. We all lived together, and all had a house for next year. Out the blue I got dumped and I really liked this guy. My friends all ditched me too because they couldn't be assed to deal with the tension between the two of us. I had to find a new house and I have no friends and most of all no partner anymore. I used to be really social, went to loads of parties with these close friends and Ex. I did basically everything with my ex. I feel so sick to my stomach and don't want to return to University. I think I might drop out. It has been 3 months and I am still feeling this intense pain. Please tell me going back has a purpose? I don't want to ever go back there.. I don't know whether I will make party friends so social again, or whether I will ever be not depressed again. I've became severely depressed as well, I had the best memories with these people and suddenly they all left me out in the cold. Literally... I was forcefully kicked out of the tower I lived in with my ex and had to find a new home. None of these friends bothered to contact me when I was depressed or even help me. I feel horrible. I didn't even cause any drama with them. I was just depressed because I got dumped and all they did was leave me.

My ex and friends were in the same social circle. We all lived together, and all had a house for next year. Out the blue I got dumped and I really liked this guy. My friends all ditched me too because they couldn't be assed to deal with the tension between the two of us. I had to find a new house and I have no friends and most of all no partner anymore. I used to be really social, went to loads of parties with these close friends and Ex. I did basically everything with my ex. I feel so sick to my stomach and don't want to return to University. I think I might drop out. It has been 3 months and I am still feeling this intense pain. Please tell me going back has a purpose? I don't want to ever go back there.. I don't know whether I will make party friends so social again, or whether I will ever be not depressed again. I've became severely depressed as well, I had the best memories with these people and suddenly they all left me out in the cold. Literally... I was forcefully kicked out of the tower I lived in with my ex and had to find a new home. None of these friends bothered to contact me when I was depressed or even help me. I feel horrible. I didn't even cause any drama with them. I was just depressed because I got dumped and all they did was leave me.

Basically they were'nt your friends, they were his and you were only there at the parties as you were with him, you were with him because no doubt he was popular and he was with you as he wanted you for sex. Chances are most people have made friends at uni by now and its doubtful many will want more. Might be easiest to apply through UCAS to start second year at another uni on a similar course that way at least you'll have the vitality of somewhere new and not have all of that to face.

University is about your future and doing something for you. I had a similar situation where i was dumped out of the blue and same social group.I thought about switching unis but I went back and joined different societies and just immersed myself in new social groups. I'm now happier than I have ever been and dropping out because of the situation would have been a huge regret.

Firstly, they were my friends not his. So you can't say that, I met them first and I partied with them first. They only dumped me because they got scared ****less when they saw me crying and they are guys. Secondly I was more social than him and he is not popular at all, I was his only friend other than MY friends. Thirdly, that is really pessimistic.. there is always room for making new friends. Running away from your problems is wimping out, and people are not close minded enough to just not want to not have you in your social circle. Sheesh.

Do you know I felt sorry for you until I read this post.


My advice is to just go back and get on with life. Unis are large places and it is possible to go through an entire degree without bumping into old friends/ acquaintances.

Virtually everyone on this site has had a broken heart at some time or another. You just have to pick yourself up and move on. What these people have done is horrible and not worth keeping up with. You will make new friends. As someone said - join new societies - try something completely different.

Firstly, they were my friends not his. So you can't say that, I met them first and I partied with them first. They only dumped me because they got scared ****less when they saw me crying and they are guys. Secondly I was more social than him and he is not popular at all, I was his only friend other than MY friends. Thirdly, that is really pessimistic.. there is always room for making new friends. Running away from your problems is wimping out, and people are not close minded enough to just not want to not have you in your social circle. Sheesh.

Sorry I didn't mean to come across so harsh, I got defensive at the fact you were suggesting I cannot make any new friends. I am sure I can, in uni I was very social until I met him (he was anti-social) I was the one who had the friends. But I think because they were all guys they followed the bro-code rule. Sorry for being mean, but I am sure it's not the end of the world. I mean I lost MY friends, but there is no use transferring unis because of it. In my opinion that is a bitch of a massive stretch. But what am I to say people have different opinions.

No offence but you'll be surprised how many people ignore the bro-code nowadays, but yeah just move on and forget about it.

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Stewie2011 was trying to help .I think this post is a but rude Imo .
I agree to an extent .If they were *your* friends as you say ,they would have stuck by you and helped you through it but they didn't .What type of a 'friend' gets scared when their 'so called' friend is going through a tough times and runs away


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Yes I understand, I was a bit rude. I think I just got really defensive because I thought he was threatening me. Being depressed and all I get even more depressed when I hear about negative things, lately been quite reactive too. Sorry about that, my apologies won't be so rude next time.

Probably.. I have no idea why they ditched me. But I assume it's because when he dumped me I started crying and none of them show any emotion. I kind of got a bit depressed after a while, and those guy friends of mine are very hard, I don't think I have ever seen any of them upset. So my guesses are that's why they dumped me.

I mean the day he broke up with me we were out on a trip the four of us. I started crying on the bus back and one of them held my hand for a bit but he looked extremely scared of my tears. The days after they asked me how I felt and I told them I was depressed, then my ex started complaining to them about how I was pathetic to be depressed and needed to get a life. It all got into a middle. In a way my ex maybe unintentionally turned them against me.

You went into a house with your boyfriend? Rookie error there.

Well yeah, sounds like they got brainwashed by him, just like you did. But the they also sound like me in the way of "argh she's crying! What do I do?" But the trick is not to dwell on it. Also, for emotional stuff it's better to have some friends that are big softies.

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