My family call me fat

I'm a female, 5'9, UK size 10 and weigh about 62kg.

I've been feeling **** about my weight for almost 2 years now. It started when my dad saw me wearing shorts and told me (whilst pointing to my legs)- 'see? You are fat'.
I've been trying to lose weight for almost 2 years now. My friends tell me I'm skinny and I don't need to lose any, but I just can't stop myself.
Lately, I've taken to calorie counting and exercising. I now eat under 1000 calories a day; 1500 on a bad day and 500 on a good day. I exercise a lot. Finally, I am starting to notice a change in my weight. I'm quite slim now.
However, my family just doesn't stop. My sister (who is the same height as me) borrows my clothes regularly, and always makes a song and a dance about how they're 'far too big for her' when they clearly fit her. Whenever I borrow hers, she says 'oh, they won't fit you' when they do fit perfectly.
Just today, my brother said that it was me that broke the bed because 'I'm too fat'. My mum makes jibes about my weight but then refuses to let me diet.

To counteract this, I won't eat at all tomorrow. I'm very good at controlling myself when it comes to food.
However, I feel like I'm just spiralling into a constant routine of dieting and feeling utterly **** about myself.

How can I get my family to shut up?

Reply 1

SophieSmall

21

Do your family not realise that what they are saying is hurting you a lot? Do they think it's just a harmless joke and don't mean it? Because you need to get across to them that it's hurting you and it's not okay.

As for how you are eating, let me just tell you now I have been there, it's not okay and it is likely to end up as a full blown eating disorder. I did that for about 2 years, constantly fasting, eating about 500 calories a day that by the time I started recovering and going back to a normal diet my weight sky rocketed and now my normal weight is a whole stone heavier than it used to be. If you want to lose weight do it healthily or else you are going to gain weight much easier in the future. I think you already realise you can't keep this up forever.

Reply 2

Jordanap

10

I'm pretty sure 1000 calories isn't healthy. 62kg at 5ft9 and a size 10 is far from fat.

Idk how to get your family to shut up - they sound like idiots.

Reply 3

bluemax

16

I call my siblings fat every day. As a joke obviously. It won't hurt you to get a thicker skin.

Reply 4

Jordanap

10

Original post by bluemax

I call my siblings fat every day. As a joke obviously. It won't hurt you to get a thicker skin.

Thicker skin will make her look even bigger!

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by bluemax

I call my siblings fat every day. As a joke obviously. It won't hurt you to get a thicker skin.

If you feel insecure about your weight, it's not exactly the nicest thing to say to somebody

Reply 6

kkboyk

21

Original post by Anonymous

If you feel insecure about your weight, it's not exactly the nicest thing to say to somebody

You tried telling them?

Reply 7

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by SophieSmall

Do your family not realise that what they are saying is hurting you a lot? Do they think it's just a harmless joke and don't mean it? Because you need to get across to them that it's hurting you and it's not okay.

As for how you are eating, let me just tell you now I have been there, it's not okay and it is likely to end up as a full blown eating disorder. I did that for about 2 years, constantly fasting, eating about 500 calories a day that by the time I started recovering and going back to a normal diet my weight sky rocketed and now my normal weight is a whole stone heavier than it used to be. If you want to lose weight do it healthily or else you are going to gain weight much easier in the future. I think you already realise you can't keep this up forever.

Yeah, you're right. I can't keep it up forever and it's just going to end up in weight gain at the end.

Reply 8

SophieSmall

21

Original post by Anonymous

Yeah, you're right. I can't keep it up forever and it's just going to end up in weight gain at the end.

I know it's hard not to listen when you have other people calling you fat, but I think you know deep down you aren't fat but you struggle with your self esteem, and that's okay it's perfectly normal and loads of people do but you need to work on it to make yourself happier otherwise you're going to keep going down this self destructive route.

Reply 9

Chicken.M.

20

Atleast you're doing something about it.

Reply 10

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by kkboyk

You tried telling them?

Yup.

Original post by SophieSmall

I know it's hard not to listen when you have other people calling you fat, but I think you know deep down you aren't fat but you struggle with your self esteem, and that's okay it's perfectly normal and loads of people do but you need to work on it to make yourself happier otherwise you're going to keep going down this self destructive route.

But I just don't know where to start. How can I improve my self-esteem?

Reply 11

SophieSmall

21

Original post by Anonymous

Yup.

But I just don't know where to start. How can I improve my self-esteem?

I don't know it's different for everybody, for me I started trying different styles of clothes. I found I felt better when I found clothes I thought fit my body better and suited me better, after that I tried to stop comparing myself to other women I know it's hard but it's just super self destructive to do that. It takes time but you can get there, I'm sure there is probably lots of better advice online on how to tackle it as I'm pretty poor at giving advice.

Reply 12

Chicken.M.

20

Original post by Anonymous

Yup.

But I just don't know where to start. How can I improve my self-esteem?

Do you do weight training?

Reply 13

zippity.doodah

3

are you honestly that weak that you react like this when people say mean things?

Reply 14

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by SophieSmall

I don't know it's different for everybody, for me I started trying different styles of clothes. I found I felt better when I found clothes I thought fit my body better and suited me better, after that I tried to stop comparing myself to other women I know it's hard but it's just super self destructive to do that. It takes time but you can get there, I'm sure there is probably lots of better advice online on how to tackle it as I'm pretty poor at giving advice.

I think I will Google it. Comparing myself to other women is a huge problem for me.
Thank you so much for your help. You've been so much help, thank you :smile:

Reply 15

tnetennba

9

You're not fat, but you will be if you continue to crash diet. Ignore them or move out.

Reply 16

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by zippity.doodah

are you honestly that weak that you react like this when people say mean things?

I have been struggling with weight and self-esteem problems for TWO YEARS. Calling me fat after my two years of slaving away, trying to get my weight down is tasteless and hurtful.