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Being sexually hit on by either Straight man or Gay man, what is reasonable defence?

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Original post by Mad Vlad
In the gay scene, it tends to be more prevalent (and generally more acceptable). That said, I find the scene (and typically those that frequent it) extremely tacky, clichéd and undesirable.


im glad you said that becuase it is also what i heard. straight men too can be very innapropriatly touchy feely too, i never understood why more people in england dont complain about this. i would regard any gayman makeing an inappropiate touch as sexual assault.

probably though in a gay bar youd expect it more, and make your choice if you go. whcih was i was more referring to a more normal and mixed environment like a gym shower where gay men can look at naked men. what if they saw a man they found hot?
Original post by Anonymous
im glad you said that becuase it is also what i heard. straight men too can be very innapropriatly touchy feely too, i never understood why more people in england dont complain about this. i would regard any gayman makeing an inappropiate touch as sexual assault.

probably though in a gay bar youd expect it more, and make your choice if you go. whcih was i was more referring to a more normal and mixed environment like a gym shower where gay men can look at naked men. what if they saw a man they found hot?


That would generally be an inappropriate time to make such an advance and I'd be willing to bet that, while hypothetically it could happen to you, it won't in your lifetime.
Original post by Anonymous
im glad you said that becuase it is also what i heard. straight men too can be very innapropriatly touchy feely too, i never understood why more people in england dont complain about this. i would regard any gayman makeing an inappropiate touch as sexual assault.

probably though in a gay bar youd expect it more, and make your choice if you go. whcih was i was more referring to a more normal and mixed environment like a gym shower where gay men can look at naked men. what if they saw a man they found hot?


Then they'd admire that man like anyone else would, not rape him!
Original post by Gabriel96
It's flattering because someone finds you attractive whether or not you find them attractive! Surely the thought of someone, even if you're not interested, finding you attractive is flattering? .
not at all, if im frank i dont even really feel flatterred if a large ugly girl found me attractive. yes people may want to feel attractive, but only to those they are attracted to. i dont even share the same sexuality with a gay, why should it be flattering??


Original post by Gabriel96

You only have to say no, only bigots would be offended. .
i didnt say offended, i said not flattered.

Original post by Gabriel96
Gay men aren't a group with uniform interests, you can't have a look that's "attractive to gay men" - either you're an attractive person, in which case you'll attracted gay/bi men and women, or you're not. It seems to me like you're majorly paranoid over a situation that just isn't a reality. If a guy hits on a women then she would be flattered even if she wouldn't want to go there. .
not true, if an ugly guy hits on a woman, she may become annoyed.

Original post by Gabriel96

That example is different, that's physical contact with, if unwanted, is unpleasant to anyone regardless of the sex of the person. Gay men, generally, would be very flattered if a girl flirted with them! They'd just say "I'm gay" and the girl would leave them alone, like with any normal person.

i dont know about that. if an attractive woman rubbed her beast on me, id be flattered.
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Wigwam5
Original post by Mad Vlad
In the gay scene, it tends to be more prevalent (and generally more acceptable). That said, I find the scene (and typically those that frequent it) extremely tacky, clichéd and undesirable.


Im guessing it's because males have a higher, more straightforward, sex drive which would make sense of the fact that they get straight to the point of touching.
Original post by Gabriel96
Then they'd admire that man like anyone else would, not rape him!


so it would be equally acceptable to you for a random man to watch a you showering in the gym and admire it?
Original post by Gabriel96
Then they'd admire that man like anyone else would, not rape him!

so it would be equally acceptable to you for a random man to watch a woman showering in the gym and admire it?
Original post by Anonymous
so it would be equally acceptable to you for a random man to watch a you showering in the gym and admire it?


Don't know if you're familiar with the name Gabriel but it's male, hence, I'm a guy. And yeah, that would be acceptable if you're in the same changing room. As long as they don't act on it then fine. Obviously men are in the same changing room so you can't stop another guy from admiring another guy.
Original post by Mad Vlad
That would generally be an inappropriate time to make such an advance and I'd be willing to bet that, while hypothetically it could happen to you, it won't in your lifetime.


definition of 'inappropriate' differs does it not. isnt there someon here that claimed a man c=grabbed his penis, some may say its inappropriate.

surely sexual drive determines these things. a gay man can check out men in the shower, do they let straight men check out women in the shower ? i guess no, for a reason
Original post by Anonymous
not at all, if im frank i dont even really feel flatterred if a large ugly girl found me attractive. yes people may want to feel attractive, but only to those they are attracted to. i dont even share the same sexuality with a gay, why should it be flattering??


i didnt say offended, i said not flattered.

not true, if an ugly guy hits on a woman, she may become annoyed.


i dont know about that. if an attractive woman rubbed her beast on me, id be flattered.


Another human being finds you attractive, that's flattering because they think you look good enough to find you attractive regardless of their sexuality or looks. As for the ugly guy and women example, only a really mean woman would be annoyed if the guy was nicely flirting with them - they'd be flattered that the ugly guy found them attractive like anyone else.
Why are people so scared of a gay guy hitting on them? It's like a woman hitting on them that they don't find attractive. If anything, it's less awkward because you're not making it personal. It's only another man that just happens to like penis. What if you hit on a lesbian? :P
I've been hit on by women I'm not interested in. It's not a big deal. I think sexuality is fluid so I did take it as a compliment.

However, one kept on touching me and made me feel uncomfortable because I didn't want her to do that. What I did, was made it clear that I'm interested in someone else and things are going good between me and that person.
I then got myself out of the situation and stopped talking to her.
(edited 9 years ago)
Original post by Anonymous
so it would be equally acceptable to you for a random man to watch a woman showering in the gym and admire it?


Straight guys check out other straight guys in the shower all the time, not for sexual purposes but for comparison, curiosity and so on.

You seem to be incredibly worked up over this subject, and looking back over the threads it seems you really want people to say they'd punch a gay guy if he hit on them. Why is that? What's caused you to be so personally involved in this subject and have such strong feelings?
Original post by Blues Clues
Why are people so scared of a gay guy hitting on them?


I don't think people are, for the most part. In my experience, most people are pretty chillaxed about it these days, a straight guy might see a gay guy hitting on him in the same way he might see an ugly girl who he's totally not interested in hitting on him.

I think the OP seems to have some hang-ups related to this, but we haven't heard the full story yet about why he's so attached to this scenario
Original post by Abdul-Karim
"I'm not gay" would generally suffice, unless they're attempting to rape you.


^This

Any reasonable person would leave you alone after you've told them you're not interested.
Original post by thegrievanceuser
Straight guys check out other straight guys in the shower all the time, not for sexual purposes but for comparison, curiosity and so on.

You seem to be incredibly worked up over this subject, and looking back over the threads it seems you really want people to say they'd punch a gay guy if he hit on them. Why is that? What's caused you to be so personally involved in this subject and have such strong feelings?


firstly i dont know what you are on about, i dont and doubt many striaght men check out naked ones.

and secondly i dont want people to say anything but be hones, in some cases youd be fearing for your safety and want to defend yourself, as some have said in their past experiences. you seem to be under the delusion that things like this never actually happen - they can ie http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1394885/Police-officer-My-Gay-UK-raped-man-sexually-assaulted-night-colleagues.html

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