Still a virgin at 25

Unfortunately, I have not been able to secure the validation of friendships let alone a sustained relationship to the point where both participants engaged in sexual relations. Part of the relates to my ADD/Autistic tendencies, which distort my social functions; The other part relates to the fact that, hitherto, I was four stones overweight; The third and final is that I was closeted to all, even myself.
I am heading to university this September for a master’s degree.. What can I do?

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Come out dude.

Hire a hooker for gods sake or go to the red light district in Amsterdam and pay for the sex where it's legal. Seriously all you problems sorted with a wee bit off cash

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

Original post by Old_Simon

Come out dude.

Kind have already. To everyone around me so that isn't a problem anymore..

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

Original post by MASTER265

Hire a hooker for gods sake or go to the red light district in Amsterdam and pay for the sex where it's legal. Seriously all you problems sorted with a wee bit off cash

Yes and lose my dignity in the process

Reply 5

KhanNab

Have you been diagnosed with autism/ADD?

Reply 6

Anonymous #1

Original post by KhanNab

Have you been diagnosed with autism/ADD?

Yes of course..

Reply 7

justjake09

Well you are starting a new chapter in September which is great and a great time to start a fresh in other parts of your life too, and you will be meeting new people.This will seem really random but, when is your birthday?

Reply 8

Anonymous #1

Original post by justjake09

April 9th..

Trying to determine my star sign?

Reply 9

KhanNab

Original post by Anonymous

Yes of course..

It's not always of course. A lot of people self-diagnose themselves with it because they're introverts, attention seekers or socially inept. But okay, fair enough.

At 25, you're going to go do your Master's Degree. Congratulations and keep it up. I'd highly recommend to perhaps travel on your own? Put yourself in situations where you're not too comfortable. Finally, try not to use your autism as sort of a bubble against trying to develop socially

(edited 9 years ago)

Reply 10

justjake09

Original post by Anonymous

April 9th..

Trying to determine my star sign?

Yes! I thought I would have to explain actually. That surprises me a little if im honest you being an aries, I believe in starsigns one hundred percent, and so do alot of people around me now because of me. You should be really confident and head strong! Im 22 in september and im kinda in the exact same boat as you..

Reply 11

Anonymous #1

Original post by KhanNab

It's not always of course. A lot of people self-diagnose themselves with it because they're introverts, attention seekers or socially inept. But okay, fair enough.

At 25, you're going to go do your Master's Degree. Congratulations and keep it up. I'd highly recommend to perhaps travel on your own? Put yourself in situations where you're not to comfortable. Finally, try not to use your autism as sort of a bubble against trying to develop socially

Wow

Thank you for your advice.

Reply 12

Anonymous #1

Original post by justjake09

So have you been closeted hitherto?

Reply 13

MASTER265

Original post by Anonymous

Yes and lose my dignity in the process

Mate screw dignity and all that pride bull****. If you wanna lose your virginity it's quick, easy and relatively cheap, then you would not be on here asking for help regarding the issue.

Reply 14

KhanNab

Original post by Anonymous

Wow

Thank you for your advice.

I think you've misunderstood me. I probably worded that incorrectly. Sorry.

I mean, don't think "i can't do that because of my autism. Nevermind." Do you know what i mean?

Reply 15

justjake09

Original post by Anonymous

So have you been closeted hitherto?

Yes, kinda of. Ive told my parents recently and a few others. A few years ago i also lost 4 stone, and im starting postrgad study in september too, its teacher training, oh and i havent had a relationship either.

Reply 16

KhanNab

Original post by justjake09

Isn't the fact that this gentleman isn't confident a little evidence against this malarkey?

Reply 17

Anonymous #1

Original post by KhanNab

I think you've misunderstood me. I probably worded that incorrectly. Sorry.

I mean, don't think "i can't do that because of my autism. Nevermind." Do you know what i mean?

Tbh I think being socially awkward is trvial if you are physically attractive; I mentioned the Autism in a range of factors, so the fact that I am a virgin clearly can't be due down solely to that.

Reply 18

Anonymous #1

Original post by MASTER265

Mate screw dignity and all that pride bull****. If you wanna lose your virginity it's quick, easy and relatively cheap, then you would not be on here asking for help regarding the issue.

And contract an STD in the process, maybe?

Reply 19

KhanNab

Original post by Anonymous

Tbh I think being socially awkward is trvial if you are physically attractive; I mentioned the Autism in a range of factors, so the fact that I am a virgin clearly can't be due down solely to that.

Oh it's a HUGE thing. If i were a woman, i'd like someone who perhaps may not be the best looking person but was able to handle themselves in social situations that range from everyday occurrences to maintaining composure in times of adversity.

Sure, looks are important. But personality really dictates the path of a relationship. E.g. (this is a crude example but) Guys who watch pr0n would definitely sleep with the girls they watch but wouldn't necessarily BE with them.