I don't understand social awkwardness/anxiety?

People have trouble doing these things because of past events that traumatise/ruin confidence. It's not their fault and as a person with social anxiety, if I could change things, I would but it's not that easy. Just consider yourself lucky you don't have such a crippling mental illness.

People have trouble doing these things because of past events that traumatise/ruin confidence. It's not their fault and as a person with social anxiety, if I could change things, I would but it's not that easy. Just consider yourself lucky you don't have such a crippling mental illness.

Well what do you do about your illness (not asking harshly, but genuinely interested)? Your confidence and people skills are not going to get any better if you don't try and talk to people you don't know. Could you not start slowly, like asking a cashier what their day has been like, or asking someone in the street for the time?

Some people really are traumatised. Others really do have disorders. Nuff sed.

Exactly.

I read a lot of stuff on here from people who say they're so anxious they hate things like shopping, going to the doctor, talking to people, etc. I'm not arrogant enough to think that because I don't understand it that it doesn't exist, but I do not understand how people cannot do these things. What do they think is going to happen if they talk to a cashier or a receptionist? Why do they care what people think of them? Why does it affect their lives so much?

I used to be shy, but I never had a problem with daily life. I got a voluntary job in a public-facing role and started talking to people whenever I could at work, making conversation with cashiers in other shops when buying things, phoning to complain about things to get my telephone skills up, etc, and now I'm really confident with social skills. Why can people with anxiety not do things like this? It's not going to get any better if they sit around and moan about it. Nobody really cares if you stumble your sentences in the real world, as long as you're nice to them.

instead of moaning about it on the internet.

That's really quite insensitive? Many people who 'moan' on the internet are having counselling. Internet forums can be therapeutic, it's a space for people with SA to vent because they don't necessarily have the confidence to speak to people in person

I read a lot of stuff on here from people who say they're so anxious they hate things like shopping, going to the doctor, talking to people, etc. I'm not arrogant enough to think that because I don't understand it that it doesn't exist, but I do not understand how people cannot do these things. What do they think is going to happen if they talk to a cashier or a receptionist? Why do they care what people think of them? Why does it affect their lives so much?

I used to be shy, but I never had a problem with daily life. I got a voluntary job in a public-facing role and started talking to people whenever I could at work, making conversation with cashiers in other shops when buying things, phoning to complain about things to get my telephone skills up, etc, and now I'm really confident with social skills. Why can people with anxiety not do things like this? It's not going to get any better if they sit around and moan about it. Nobody really cares if you stumble your sentences in the real world, as long as you're nice to them.

Well I for one am doing a mixture of CBT and exposure therapy at the moment,

It gets tiresome when I see people saying things like 'I've had counselling for two years and I'm on X medication and have Y many doctors appointments, but I still can't do (whatever social task) after all this time. I'm really sad and isolated and I don't have any friends and I don't know what to do'. Obviously a paraphrase but that's the gist of some of the things on here. It's pretty obvious if they carry on the way they are then nothing is ever going to get better for them. A lot of them don't seem to be making any effort and expect the medication and counselling to be magically fixing their lives, without them having to do anything themselves.

What is hard to grasp about the concept of 'irrational' fear?

Cock & ball torture?

Well what do you do about your illness (not asking harshly, but genuinely interested)? Your confidence and people skills are not going to get any better if you don't try and talk to people you don't know. Could you not start slowly, like asking a cashier what their day has been like, or asking someone in the street for the time?

The irrational part. It just doesn't make sense to me that people cannot think that they are being so irrational that it is possible for them to change if they really try.