Why do girls ignore emails? Watch

Anonymous #1
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I met a girl I briefly met at uni (and fancied) who worked at another financial firm.

We got in touch and started communicating on bbg messenger. I got her number, but she rarely replied to texts.

She started to contact me often to chat on the messenger and we flirted a little. Then she moved to another office abroad, but still kept in touch. We talked on there everyday.

Once she asked me if I had been to some fancy restaurant and I should take my date. I told her I didn't have one. Was she asking me something there?

Then I moved to another office and don't have that messenger tool. I gave her my email, though now realise I should have tried to get a number again. She said she would miss me and to keep in touch.

Although her email results in it going to her messenger directly, she has never initiated contact. I have always had to. Also she has never replied to her personal email, only to the work one whilst at work. But now rather than a constant conversation throughout the day it is erratic and some days she hasn't replied at all.

As in she will say "Hi, I'm great how are you? Tell me stuff!" and then not reply to my 2nd email.

WTF?

WHY DO GIRLS IGNORE EMAILS?
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pshah2
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She sounds like she is flirting (especially if contacting often and initiating contact).

When you knew her at your first city, did she ever physically flirt (touching, etc)?

She must be fishing for whether you have a girlfriend.. though maybe keeping you as a spare, since now she lives abroad..

Sounds like she really liked you, but was also nervous. Alternatively, she was just playing you along for fun and enjoying the attention. She could be one of those girls who likes to tease.

She may also have found someone else to talk to in the brief interim since you lost the messenger ability to talk to her.

Ask her if she has whatsapp or skype one day. Be like, I miss our conversation, do you use skype? or something like that.

Good luck!
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by pshah2)
She sounds like she is flirting (especially if contacting often and initiating contact).

When you knew her at your first city, did she ever physically flirt (touching, etc)?

She must be fishing for whether you have a girlfriend.. though maybe keeping you as a spare, since now she lives abroad..

Sounds like she really liked you, but was also nervous. Alternatively, she was just playing you along for fun and enjoying the attention. She could be one of those girls who likes to tease.

She may also have found someone else to talk to in the brief interim since you lost the messenger ability to talk to her.

Ask her if she has whatsapp or skype one day. Be like, I miss our conversation, do you use skype? or something like that.

Good luck!
Yeah we met up once (she invited me to a party). She had her arm around mine like we were a couple for a time. But I say her do something similar to another person later (she was a girl though..)

Thing is her mood seems to vary a lot. She could just be a tease, but I genuinely miss her now!

Why no replies to emails? I mean they go to her messenger anyway! It's still instant!
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swarly
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if i had to guess. she doesnt like YOU. she likes the ATTENTION you give her.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by swarly)
if i had to guess. she doesnt like YOU. she likes the ATTENTION you give her.
Yeah you could be right. I mean we bantered a lot on messenger. She seems to like my jokes. But she mentioned me being sweet and so on. So I guess friendship rather than potential relationship.

But why did she ask me about having a date? Why did she contact me everyday then and not at all now?

She used to initiate contact quite often.

Should I move on and just ignore her? Should I keep initiating an email which may or may not get a response?

WHY DO GIRLS LOVE THE ATTENTION AND THEN JUST BLANK OFF A GUY LATER? It's just rude. What if a guy did that?
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pshah2
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(Original post by swarly)
if i had to guess. she doesnt like YOU. she likes the ATTENTION you give her.
Yeah, sorry I mean I think she does like you, and loves your attention, but she probably likes the fact that you fancy her and contact her. She feels in control.

I would guess she is one of those flirty to everyone types, who never gets off or ends up in a relationship with anyone?
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Anonymous #1
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Yes. She doesn't seem to ever have a bf.
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swarly
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Yeah you could be right. I mean we bantered a lot on messenger. She seems to like my jokes. But she mentioned me being sweet and so on. So I guess friendship rather than potential relationship.

But why did she ask me about having a date? Why did she contact me everyday then and not at all now?

She used to initiate contact quite often.

Should I move on and just ignore her? Should I keep initiating an email which may or may not get a response?

WHY DO GIRLS LOVE THE ATTENTION AND THEN JUST BLANK OFF A GUY LATER? It's just rude. What if a guy did that?
girls like to keep their options open.

she might not want you, but she wants to know she can have you if she wants.

out of curiosity, has she ever called you 'cute'? that can be a huge red flag, and indicator of the above.
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Abstraction
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Because she's another narcissist using you for validation and attention when needed, and who discards you when she's bored. I'm not being horrible (to you) but she simply doesn't care about you. Yeah, maybe she's busy, but that's no excuse to not check your email for a few minutes a day. If she's occupied she should have the decency to say so and stop being unable to see past her own nose. Realise your worth, stop wasting your time and do something else OP.

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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by swarly)
girls like to keep their options open.

she might not want you, but she wants to know she can have you if she wants.

out of curiosity, has she ever called you 'cute'? that can be a huge red flag, and indicator of the above.
Yeah I think you may be right.

I get mixed messages from her. She has called me .... cute, sweet and given me the nickname silly or bantered with me about quotes, london, asked me for the best restuarants or for advice.

She once suggested I take a date to a restaurant, and I told her I didn't have one. Was she fishing for whether I have a gf?
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Abstraction)
Because she's another narcissist using you for validation and attention when needed, and who discards you when she's bored. I'm not being horrible (to you) but she simply doesn't care about you. Yeah, maybe she's busy, but that's no excuse to not check your email for a few minutes a day. If she's occupied she should have the decency to say so and stop being unable to see past her own nose. Realise your worth, stop wasting your time and do something else OP.

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Thanks bud. No offence taken. Yeah she seems to do that a lot. Even when we had messenger contact regularly. In this case it's not even taking time to check email as my email goes straight to her messenger inbox (it's all one system). She used to contact me everyday or talk to me at least 3/4 times a day on that chat. Now she hardly replies and never ever initiates. Even after I wished her a happy birthday, she responded with "Thanks ever so much. How are you?" Then didn't reply to my next email. What is she playing at? I guess, I should kiss this friendship goodbye as it was probably not a real friendship then?

Advice?
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pshah2
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(Original post by swarly)
girls like to keep their options open.

she might not want you, but she wants to know she can have you if she wants.

out of curiosity, has she ever called you 'cute'? that can be a huge red flag, and indicator of the above.
She might be a 'controller'. Girls who like to have control and options, but never deliver. As a result, guys lose out spending time on such girls and not realising their own worth. The controller girl also ends up with no one.
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swarly
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Yeah I think you may be right.

I get mixed messages from her. She has called me .... cute, sweet and given me the nickname silly or bantered with me about quotes, london, asked me for the best restuarants or for advice.

She once suggested I take a date to a restaurant, and I told her I didn't have one. Was she fishing for whether I have a gf?
ahh from my experience cute doesnt tend to be a good word. in fact it has tended to mean she doesnt want you, she wants to know she can have you if she wants.

possibly. but the reasons wouldnt be clear. again she may just have wanted to know if you're available for he if she wants to.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by swarly)
ahh from my experience cute doesnt tend to be a good word. in fact it has tended to mean she doesnt want you, she wants to know she can have you if she wants.

possibly. but the reasons wouldnt be clear. again she may just have wanted to know if you're available for he if she wants to.
Yeah she was probably asking me if I'm available. She did tend to contact me though.. as in initiate contact, such that we'd be talking more than working sometimes!

She has said, "you're so cute" to my compliments sometimes. We have inside jokes and so on, but yeah I guess, when she lived here she didn't text a lot.

So you'd agree she was probably just knowing she could have me. Thing is even if we live in different countries now?!

Why are girls like that man.. I genuinely liked her and I would never do that to a girl.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by swarly)
ahh from my experience cute doesnt tend to be a good word. in fact it has tended to mean she doesnt want you, she wants to know she can have you if she wants.

possibly. but the reasons wouldnt be clear. again she may just have wanted to know if you're available for he if she wants to.
Would appreciate an answer to another question of mine bud.. http://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/show....php?t=2859417
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pshah2
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(Original post by Abstraction)
Because she's another narcissist using you for validation and attention when needed, and who discards you when she's bored. I'm not being horrible (to you) but she simply doesn't care about you. Yeah, maybe she's busy, but that's no excuse to not check your email for a few minutes a day. If she's occupied she should have the decency to say so and stop being unable to see past her own nose. Realise your worth, stop wasting your time and do something else OP.

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Got to agree with this guy. She's a classic controller who wants attention, to know she can have you and who ends up holding you back.

Let me put it this way. Even if she's not romantically interested, if she was a true friend, she would at least reply and also would at least initiate contact sometimes.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Abstraction)
Because she's another narcissist using you for validation and attention when needed, and who discards you when she's bored. I'm not being horrible (to you) but she simply doesn't care about you. Yeah, maybe she's busy, but that's no excuse to not check your email for a few minutes a day. If she's occupied she should have the decency to say so and stop being unable to see past her own nose. Realise your worth, stop wasting your time and do something else OP.

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Why are girls like that? I would never do that to her or another girl?
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swarly
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(Original post by Anonymous)

Why are girls like that man.. I genuinely liked her and I would never do that to a girl.
guys are equally as frustrating to girls too.

You should have just told her outright when you had the chance.

carpe diem.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by swarly)
guys are equally as frustrating to girls too.

You should have just told her outright when you had the chance.

carpe diem.
I know, but thing is when I met at and established contact (phone number, messenger contact at work), she was about to move cities in a month.

So I thought, there would be no point asking her out. She was also going on holiday for 2 weeks.

Then as we chatted on messenger, we sort of connected. Or at least I thought so, certainly if she initiated contact. Now I wonder whether she did it because she was lonely and hadn't made new friends over there.

But she seems to have discarded me now. The ironic thing is she asked me one day how she found it difficult to keep in touch with friends when abroad. Ermmm... maybe because she never replies or messages people herself!

I reckon she was just keeping me as someone she could have as she must have gotten the hints that I liked her more than a friend.

You seem to be an expert on women. Could you help me with another question:
http://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/show....php?t=2859417
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pshah2
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(Original post by swarly)
guys are equally as frustrating to girls too.

You should have just told her outright when you had the chance.

carpe diem.
Yep, having said that, rather than risk rejection, you got the friendship thing for however long she kept in touch. So that's something I guess.

But she does seem like a bit of a user, if she doesn't respond. Unfortunately some girls are like that.

And you can cross her off the gf or friend list. Just make her an acquaintaince.

"Some people should be around your entire life and others should just make an appearance"
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