The problem with the argument that "feminism is actually about equal rights for men and women" is that, most of the time they start off by saying that all they want is equal rights. But then when they continue into more detail, one realises that what they actually want is often equality of outcome, which is quite different. The simple fact is, you can't have that, because men and women are not, and never will be exactly the same. Putting them in equal conditions will always result in an unequal outcome.
Look at Emma Watson's speech for example. One of the things she mentions, as though it's a real problem that needs solving, is this:
"At 15, my girlfriends didn’t want to join sports teams because they didn’t want to appear masculine. At 18, my male friends were unable to express their feelings."
But this has nothing to do with equal rights. It's not illegal for girls to play sports, nor is it illegal for boys to express their feelings. They both have completely equal rights in this regard. But according to Emma's statement, girls are less likely to want to play sports, and boys are less likely to want to express emotions, or hear about other people's emotions. Why is that a problem? The innate differences between the genders have to come into play somewhere.
When each gender tends to want something different for themselves, what is the point in trying to force an equality of outcome here? If you're claiming to be giving them equal rights, then let them decide whether or not to exercise those rights as they see fit.