Feeling lonely, (1st year)
I know we haven't been here long and after freshers everything will more than likely settle down. But because I don't particularly have any real interest in clubbing or drinking etc, it's very difficult for me to find people to hang around with. I'm honestly a lot happier staying in or maybe going out to a bar but not drinking loads, but nearly everyone I've spoken to seems to want to get wasted every night. I feel pretty isolated and alone currently, and I'm not really sure what to do. Have asked on the freshers page on Facebook whether anyone just wants to hang out and not go crazy but I seem to only get replies from people telling me to go to Bang Bang and Walkabout and stuff, despite me saying I'm not into all that.
Is there anyone at all who is just interested in chilling out? Would be really helpful and nice as I am feeling pretty sad about it all at the moment.
Is there anyone at all who is just interested in chilling out? Would be really helpful and nice as I am feeling pretty sad about it all at the moment.
People call me an old woman, because I like to sit curled up in a blanket, drink tea and read books and I haven't escaped the teens yet!
Trust me, you are not the only person who feels this way, even though it seems like it! I haven't been to Uni yet (I'm studying a-levels), but why don't you try to join a club/society or something? Most universities seem to have them, and you'll be socializing with people with similar interests. As you're just starting out it's a good time to get involved too. Even though, at first, you will be just going to the club, once you start to make friends you'll probably chill out
If you are stuck and you don't want to join a club/society, try to get a part time job or something. That way you can make en effort to be friendly with your colleagues and it will fill your time Try to remember that this awkward settling in/not having many people to hang out with stage won't last forever, and I'm sure you'll make some friends soon!
Good luck!
Trust me, you are not the only person who feels this way, even though it seems like it! I haven't been to Uni yet (I'm studying a-levels), but why don't you try to join a club/society or something? Most universities seem to have them, and you'll be socializing with people with similar interests. As you're just starting out it's a good time to get involved too. Even though, at first, you will be just going to the club, once you start to make friends you'll probably chill out
If you are stuck and you don't want to join a club/society, try to get a part time job or something. That way you can make en effort to be friendly with your colleagues and it will fill your time
Try to remember that this awkward settling in/not having many people to hang out with stage won't last forever, and I'm sure you'll make some friends soon!Good luck!
Hey Zoe, I'm feeling exactly the same as you right now. All of my flatmates are really nice but they're out in clubs every night and that isn't really my thing. Although I went with them and tried to fit in its just gotten to the point now where I just follow them around all night and don't even speak to them. They're all really comfortable around each other and its like they've been friends for years whereas I just feel like I don't fit in.. I haven't really made any friends yet. If you just want to talk on here or if you want to meet up sometime just PM me.
Original post by ZoeSlocombe
I know we haven't been here long and after freshers everything will more than likely settle down. But because I don't particularly have any real interest in clubbing or drinking etc, it's very difficult for me to find people to hang around with. I'm honestly a lot happier staying in or maybe going out to a bar but not drinking loads, but nearly everyone I've spoken to seems to want to get wasted every night. I feel pretty isolated and alone currently, and I'm not really sure what to do. Have asked on the freshers page on Facebook whether anyone just wants to hang out and not go crazy but I seem to only get replies from people telling me to go to Bang Bang and Walkabout and stuff, despite me saying I'm not into all that.
Is there anyone at all who is just interested in chilling out? Would be really helpful and nice as I am feeling pretty sad about it all at the moment.
Is there anyone at all who is just interested in chilling out? Would be really helpful and nice as I am feeling pretty sad about it all at the moment.
Hey, I'm feeling quite like you right now. I just don't feel like going clubbing every night and it's difficult to feel like I'm making any real progress with making friends cause of that. I'm up for doing something one evening that isn't like those. Maybe PM me?
On a more positive note, once everyone properly starts their course I think it'll all be a bit calmer and people won't be going out quite so much. Plus you'll start meeting people on your course who are maybe more like you in terms of drinking and that?
Often, friendships formed in an alcohol-fuelled first week or two don't last that long anyway. Confidence in your own individuality should probably soon attract like-minded souls.
As a mature student, I find that I don't really have much in common in a lot of the other freshers, but on the other hand, I have a fairly busy off-campus life - numerous pets, work (gradually diminishing as I look at my Uni timetable!) .....
As a mature student, I find that I don't really have much in common in a lot of the other freshers, but on the other hand, I have a fairly busy off-campus life - numerous pets, work (gradually diminishing as I look at my Uni timetable!) .....
Original post by ZoeSlocombe
I know we haven't been here long and after freshers everything will more than likely settle down. But because I don't particularly have any real interest in clubbing or drinking etc, it's very difficult for me to find people to hang around with. I'm honestly a lot happier staying in or maybe going out to a bar but not drinking loads, but nearly everyone I've spoken to seems to want to get wasted every night. I feel pretty isolated and alone currently, and I'm not really sure what to do. Have asked on the freshers page on Facebook whether anyone just wants to hang out and not go crazy but I seem to only get replies from people telling me to go to Bang Bang and Walkabout and stuff, despite me saying I'm not into all that.
Is there anyone at all who is just interested in chilling out? Would be really helpful and nice as I am feeling pretty sad about it all at the moment.
Is there anyone at all who is just interested in chilling out? Would be really helpful and nice as I am feeling pretty sad about it all at the moment.
Give it few weeks. Get involved with the societies you like and you'll be able to pick out those who are relentlessly partying weeks after freshers and those who have calmed down and go to pubs every now and then. Don't do anything you don't want to.
Original post by muv
Hi Zoe, I am a mum of a daughter at Plymouth, she is feeling down and like you, not a clubber, would you like her email address? She is in St Thomas court
Sorry to hear that she's feeling down too! That would be nice yeah, thank you
Thanks
Original post by ZoeSlocombe
Sorry to hear that she's feeling down too! That would be nice yeah, thank you
As a quick addition to my previous reply - I know a lot of freshers who are in halls and away from home sometimes also miss their daily routine at home, especially if it involves a much loved pet.
If anyone is suffering dog 'withdrawal' symptoms, I shall sometimes be on campus with my PAT / trainee support dog. Since there aren't many dogs wandering around on campus, she'll be easy to spot (she's a cream miniature Labradoodle, with peach ears, and a constantly wagging rear end that resembles a bendy bus, often to be seen with a colourful stuffed toy in her mouth). She is also non-allergenic, so suitable for interaction with allergy suffers. Feel free to stop and play with her, or even arrange to walk her.
If anyone is suffering dog 'withdrawal' symptoms, I shall sometimes be on campus with my PAT / trainee support dog. Since there aren't many dogs wandering around on campus, she'll be easy to spot (she's a cream miniature Labradoodle, with peach ears, and a constantly wagging rear end that resembles a bendy bus, often to be seen with a colourful stuffed toy in her mouth). She is also non-allergenic, so suitable for interaction with allergy suffers. Feel free to stop and play with her, or even arrange to walk her.
Hey, daughter of 'Muv' here, and as she correctly states, I too am feeling a bit down. Do you know of any sort of private messaging on here so we can continue feeling sad together in privacy?
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