I don't like what my girlfriend does

Before you start calling me insecure.. yeah i'm a bit insecure so what? But my girlfriend talks to random guys online and cams with them on skype etc. She sometimes stays up late camming with them and her status on facebook is single. She use to be on a dating site "attracting" many guys, I asked her and she says its just for friends. She deleted it but I still don't like what she does now. I feel a little insecure about this. I have mentioned it to her but she still does it behind my back and lies. :/ She says she just wants me and only me. What should i do?

Reply 1

Mathlover123

You are justified in your insecurity, I actually talk from experience of an incredibly similar situation that happened between me and my girlfriend (who I live with now). I would suggest making her realise its not just that you don't like it but it actually upsets you and that she needs to make a choice as you can't keep getting hurt over this. I am now going to guess some things about your girlfriend, she is insecure more so than you and has very few friends. Would that be accurate?

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

Original post by Mathlover123

Yeah she is that type of girl, how did you know?

Reply 3

Mathlover123

Basically this is her way of trying to feel better about herself, to gain some self esteem from other peoples compliments. Tell her you will be there for her and you think she is beautiful (try and compliment her as I imagine she doesn't get enough of that). Its hard to say what to suggest exactly ask her whether she really wants a boyfriend or to keep doing this, Don't let her have both I went through about a year or two of that and its awful. Just try to make her realise that she can get all that happiness from being with you and she does not need to be doing stuff for other men. Also stay up late and cam with her can be a good move.

I could suggest a million things that will all sound like conflicting jibberish as I say its a tough situation and I got fairly lucky. Oh but don't let her lie to you, you bring it up if you catch her in the act, it might not help your relationship, but you need to not feel insecure.

Reply 4

Arkasia

To quote every single girl any time a girl posts a similar thread:

"Dump her, you can do better".

Reply 5

Blind Ferret

You're not insecure.This is perfectly acceptable to be perturbed by, you either do the same or make her feel the same way, then see how she feels. You're young, too young for people not fully involved, knowing she's a tit now is better than later, challenge it.

Reply 6

Kaiju

Original post by Anonymous

Yeah she is that type of girl, how did you know?

It's pretty basic. If she's speaking to guys online and camming it's probably out of some search for self affirmation to try and temporarily patch up insecurities.

You can't let her lie to you, though, even if it's just to maintain the power balance in the relationship - the fact it really bothers you is all the more reason to call her out on it. If she's willing to lie, you can probably do better bro.

If it carries on, call her out. If she's unwilling to budge, it might be worth giving her an ultimatum, even if you don't really want to or mean it. Can't let someone abuse your trust and have no consequences :/

Reply 7

scrotgrot

Just say, "Hey ____, I know about your dirty little cam secret, so either give it up or break up with me. If you're lonely, I am on hand to offer support."

Reply 8

Anonymous #1

Original post by Mathlover123

Original post by Kaiju

I've asked her why she does it and she replies with like "not this again". She says it like i'm making stuff up. But i'm not. She's confessed quite a few times but she keeps doing it :frown:

Reply 9

fineas

honestly it sounds like she's cheating on you

Reply 10

gt459

If her relationship status is single on Facebook then she ain't your girlfriend.

Move on. Do better :smile:

Reply 11

Huskaris

You're not insecure, she is a ho.

Good luck.

Reply 12

stargirl63

Why are you dating a girl who craves male attention? Get rid. It's only going to get worse.

Reply 13

MrMango

Original post by Anonymous

play her at her own game.. set ur fb status to single and start chatting to women.

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Reply 14

Balloon Baboon

Original post by Anonymous

I only read to that part. Seriously, man up. Go out and find a girl who likes you and only wants to cam with you.

Reply 15

Anonymous #2

Dump her and it can't be that hard to find someone better.

Reply 16

MissPinkyMonkey

She is the one who is insecure, not you.

Either you haven't given her enough attention to make her feel satisfied or she just has a black hole inside her heart that needs endless mens attention to feed it up.

The problem is she didn't see it as a problem and did it behind your back which is certainly unacceptable.

Talk to her, if nothing change. You don't need to live with that.

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Reply 17

Emily.97

Original post by Anonymous

Sorry about that- I would feel the same way as you do.

It's concerning that she doesnt seem to be adapting her behaviour and compromising for you and your relationship. I would say to talk to her but obviously because you have and shes reacted like that, its tricky isnt it?
I'd say approach her again and tell her about how you feel and how its affecting you. If shes not willing to listen and empathise with that then maybe you should be questioning whether you can deal with it, or whether you wont stand for it. Relationships are about compromise.. and if both parties arent willing to do that, then the problems will deterriorate.

Reply 18

Rum Ham

Wow. I would hate this. You aren't insecure, this would make anyone feel like crap. If she isn't willing to change then you know what to do, end it

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