Not sure if boyfriend's friend likes me

It's a guy who's pretty much his best friend and has been for a couple of years. I didn't know him and his girlfriend that much before but we've come to know them more recently.
I have always had a hard time working out whether he has a crush or whether he's just really friendly and polite, especially since my boyfriend has said that he doesn't really have close female friends.
He's always been really complimentary about me to my boyfriend, saying I'm really nice, funny and cool (I figured he was just a nice guy of course) but there have been other things. Once I bought my boyfriend a present he wanted, and apparently his best friend, (let's name him John) said about me, aww, she's cute.
He never goes on facebook at all, but he wrote a message on my wall to wish me a happy birthday. Then, the year after, he was a little annoyed at my boyfriend because he had forgotten to tell him it was my birthday.
He's never done this to my face, but apparently he has asked my boyfriend questions about our sex life and stuff like that, which I was surprised about.
As I mentioned, we've started to spend more time with John and his girlfriend, and John always laughs at my jokes, and he's even started teasing me sometimes.
He even asked me the other day if I had changed my hair, then told my boyfriend that it suited me when I wasn't listening. I've seen him looking at me a couple of times, but I'm really not sure.
The thing is, I've started to feel so awkward about it. He's a nice guy but I'm obviously dating his best friend and would never do that to him or to John's girlfriend.
John's girlfriend is apparently very jealous and insecure, and I would never want her to think anything like that. However, as I mentioned, he's generally very polite, and he knows i'm shy, so he might just be trying to make me feel comfortable.
Sometimes when we're together though, he doesn't speak to me that much, so it's hard to say. If it's true, I'd like to discourage it for obvious reasons, but I couldn't speak to anyone about it without causing an issue.
Does it sound like he does or is he just being nice? He also made a joke to my boyfriend about a 'girlfriend swap' and about being alone with me and his girlfriend.

Reply 1

Anonymous #1

Is there anything that I could say in this situation? Or is it just one of those things that you have to ignore and not bother about? (If he did like me)

Reply 2

somemightsay888

Original post by Anonymous

He never goes on facebook at all, but he wrote a message on my wall to wish me a happy birthday. Then, the year after, he was a little annoyed at my boyfriend because he had forgotten to tell him it was my birthday.

This is how stalking begins

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

No I doubt he is stalking me lol... also we've both been with our partners a few years and live with them, and I think that issues like this just cannot happen when you're seeing the people regularly

Reply 4

Anonymous #2

He might do, but the fact that he tells your boyfriend about it shows he has no wish to act on it. Talking about your sex life isn't weird for guys. Also his attraction may be physical rather than emotional, in which case its you a bunch of other girls he is attracted to.

Either way, if he's nice to you then just continue to be nice back. From what you've said I don't think he'd ever act on it.

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

Yeah you're right, he seems very committed to his girlfriend and that's good. My boyfriend has never seemed to suspect anything, so yeah I guess it's just harmless and I will just be polite back. Thanks :smile:

Reply 6

Kaiju

Original post by Anonymous

He also made a joke to my boyfriend about a 'girlfriend swap' and about being alone with me and his girlfriend.

Sounds like a weird guy and I'm not surprised his gf is insecure. Lame af. Paying you enough compliments for you to notice is also pretty suspect, I might just be jaded from personal experiences though.
Could be very friendly, could secretly want to give you the d. Who knows?

Original post by Anonymous

He might do, but the fact that he tells your boyfriend about it shows he has no wish to act on it.

Absolutely not true at all. In the slightest.

Reply 7

Anonymous #1

There was also a joke about m boyfriend and his girlfriend so it was kind of a two-way joke and he said it in retaliation. But yeah maybe i'll never know. I'd certainly never ask anyway. Well i'm just going to forget about it and continue as normal :smile:

bump

Just from reading that, it sounds like he is just a nice guy. You're his best friend's gf so of course he'll be nice to you & wish you a happy birthday. I think you're over-thinking this & making it a bigger deal then it actually is. But then again, i'm not you so I don't know how he actually acts in person towards you.

Just forget it and don't jump to any conclusions. Obviously if he makes a move on you then you'll know but for now you're just grasping at straws because he could be a genuinely nice guy.

Reply 10

Anonymous #1

yeah I'm sure that I have just been overthinking it, it's probably since I've never seen him around other girls so i dunno how he is in general, but thanks. :smile:

Reply 11

Anonymous #1

Does anyone have any tips of how I could not look embarrassed around him; be able to look him in the eye etc?