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Anyone else saving themselves for marriage?

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Reply 60
Avatar for corax
corax
21
Why is marriage seen as the be all and end all?

My parents aren't married and they've been happily in love together since before I was born.

Why does love always have to equate to marriage? Maybe it's because I'm not religious/upbringing but I'm not bothered about getting married - being in a committed/loving relationship is what matters.


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Reply 61
Avatar for Zarek
Zarek
21
Original post by holmes221
It's related to the ego. They think that because they have waited till marriage (how sad!) that they are above others.

I share your view. Each to their own I guess..
Original post by Zarek
I share your view. Each to their own I guess..


We are now friends :smile:
Original post by German123
Do you think there is such thing as "love"


Yes, definitely.
Original post by Protégé
Yes, definitely.

Cool.
Original post by German123
Cool.
You can't really understand it without experiencing it. It's also the only thing that's influenced me without me knowing, so I find it pretty fascinating.
I am, i'm nearly 19 soon
Reply 67
Avatar for amslol
amslol
no point thinking about this now, it's okay to change your mind, take things as they come :smile:
Original post by Protégé
You can't really understand it without experiencing it. It's also the only thing that's influenced me without me knowing, so I find it pretty fascinating.


Cool.
Original post by Veggiechic6
Men aren't going to explode just because they don't get some action you know (as much as they try to make out they will). A worthwhile guy will understand and wait until you're ready. If he won't, you've saved yourself the trouble of somebody not worth bothering with.


I agree, but most girls aren't waiting until marriage because they aren't ready, but because of a belief about morality. I could argue if a girl is "worth bothering with" she'll care about what makes me happy too...
Denying yourself your basic instinctual urge based on a man made religious ceremony which is rapidly becoming defunkt seems a little strange. But each to their own.
Original post by chocolatesauce
Yes saving myself, I think it's very meaningful.
Its like we share something totally unique and sexy, no one else can have him but ME and vice versa... I don't feel the need to be 'wanted' or 'used' by a bunch of others for no reason other than 'Oh I Think he looks Hot'.


I totally agree! Plus, whats left thats unique between two people if they have done so before hand? I've even heard guys refer to their ex's as their leftovers.... (I'm sure some girls say the same back).
Plus it leads to other complications.
Reply 72
Avatar for Kangie
Kangie
13
Yes - because I value my virginity and I still don't feel mature enough to do the deed.:colondollar:
Marriage is originally an economic construct anyway - has very little to do with sex.
Reply 74
Avatar for GailQ
GailQ
10
Original post by holmes221
It's related to the ego. They think that because they have waited till marriage (how sad!) that they are above others.

Ego?? I don't really see how that makes sense considering that you are more likely to hear people brag about how much sex they are having than you are to hear someone openly boast about their virginity. If anything, it is the former who come across as being superior - just look in everyday society, advertising, television, music...it's everywhere.

Also don't see how it is "sad"? So what if you choose to wait? So what if you don't? Each to their own.
(edited 9 years ago)
Original post by derma2019
I totally agree! Plus, whats left thats unique between two people if they have done so before hand? I've even heard guys refer to their ex's as their leftovers.... (I'm sure some girls say the same back).
Plus it leads to other complications.

Exactly! I don't want to be used and even if then you "loved" eachother later on it's like I feel nothing for him, why did I do that and not with the person I really love.
Sad fact of life IMHO - if the sex is not working with your partner then that relationship is going to be very difficult to sustain. Therefore saving oneself for marriage is very risky.
Reply 77
Avatar for Kangie
Kangie
13
Original post by GailQ
Ego?? I don't really see how that makes sense considering that you are more likely to hear people brag about how much sex they are having than you are to hear someone openly boast about their virginity. If anything, it is the former who come across as being superior - just look in everyday society, advertising, television, music...it's everywhere.

Also don't see how it is "sad"? So what if you choose to wait? So what if you don't? Each to their own.


This. Totally agree - once some 'popular' people came up to my friends and I and asked if we had had sex. We all said no and then they laughed at us and said they'd done it (bearing in mind we were around 15 at this time).
People who have had sex tend to have a bigger ego and are more confident + think they are superior.
Original post by GailQ
Ego?? I don't really see how that makes sense considering that you are more likely to hear people brag about how much sex they are having than you are to hear someone openly boast about their virginity. If anything, it is the former who come across as being superior - just look in everyday society, advertising, television, music...it's everywhere.

Also don't see how it is "sad"? So what if you choose to wait? So what if you don't? Each to their own.


Sad because it's usually fuelled by external influences like religion or strict parents.
Original post by chocolatesauce
Exactly! I don't want to be used and even if then you "loved" eachother later on it's like I feel nothing for him, why did I do that and not with the person I really love.


right on sister :h: and him saying ' he loves you' isn't exactly proof of commitment either

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