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Men want virgins to marry. Let me explain please.

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Original post by Ekemini
Why were you wound up at me.


i didnt realise you were a girl, i honestly just thought it was a guy trying to make his opinion fact.

i think its a bit of an age thing too, i used to think when i was younger i'd stay a virgin but when i grew up and got into a relationship i realised its not so easy as that.

i respect what you're saying but i dont think its completely true
Reply 141
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Original post by luuucyx
i didnt realise you were a girl, i honestly just thought it was a guy trying to make his opinion fact.

i think its a bit of an age thing too, i used to think when i was younger i'd stay a virgin but when i grew up and got into a relationship i realised its not so easy as that.

i respect what you're saying but i dont think its completely true

What part of it do you think is untrue?
Original post by Ekemini
Ok I know the title might offend some people. I am notcalling girls who are not virgin’s sluts. Over there in America or UK it isprobably not a big deal but here it is. I am African and we value values. Ifyou are not a virgin and you get married, the husband would find out (obviously)and you become a disgrace to yourself as well as your family... My dad puts itlike this: you can’t have your cake and eat it too. To Africans (ok Nigerians)the men would want you to be a virgin. My dad says that’s why I should beware ofboys. They would sleep around and do what they want but when they are lookingfor a wife they would be looking for a virgin. He gave me an example. At a friend’swedding after the ceremony a couple of men stood and started talking about thebride. What were they saying? Well they were talking about how they each hadhad a piece of the girl. They were boasting and bragging. She wasn’t a virginand all those men had slept with her. I can’t really remember if the groom overheardthem but my dad asks that why would a girl want that kind of a reputation? Why couldn’tshe just wait? Why is she such in a hurry? It’s a thing of pride if a father cangive off his daughter as a virgin. It shows that the girl was brought up rightand society would respect those parents. What do you guys think?




Nope, not necessarily. If you're referring to the expectation that women bleed when they lose their "virginity" its not always the case. It actually shouldn't be the case.

You're unlikely to find many here who agree with you as its users are largely westernised.

Social and cultural values are largely arbitrary. They have no objective meaning. Just because your dad says this it doesn't mean he is right or that you have to agree.
(edited 9 years ago)
Original post by Smash Bandicoot
thanks for clarifying. I also like to do cute stuff for partners and did with my ex, it was reciprocated; but I think if that as 'treated' or 'spoiled' :tongue: whipped is more serious controlling behaviour

that's the case for a select number of man-children sure, but you do know that a lot of (mostly young) women also have unrealistic expectations of men especially for the age group they're both at. As in 16 year old girls expect 17 year old guys to function at the same level as a 25 year old?


yeah exactly, im a proper puppy when im in love but its reciprocated too.

hahahahahaha i have never heard the term man-children before that is definitely one im keeping! yeah definitely, but im talking about like 22/23 year old guys lool.
Original post by Ekemini
What do you guys think?

I completely agree. Marriage is a joke in the West, but if men must get married they should pick an unspoiled virgin.

No hymen? No diamond. :sexface:
Original post by Ekemini
What part of it do you think is untrue?


the fact that a woman is worth less if shes not a virgin
Reply 146
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Original post by Smash Bandicoot
thanks for clarifying. I also like to do cute stuff for partners and did with my ex, it was reciprocated; but I think if that as 'treated' or 'spoiled' :tongue: whipped is more serious controlling behaviour

that's the case for a select number of man-children sure, but you do know that a lot of (mostly young) women also have unrealistic expectations of men especially for the age group they're both at. As in 16 year old girls expect 17 year old guys to function at the same level as a 25 year old?

Explain what you mean by unrealistic expectations please
Original post by Ekemini
I get what you are saying but I never said my values are better than any bodies.


Of course not, with your 'we value values' comment you're simply saying nobody else has values.
Reply 148
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Original post by luuucyx
the fact that a woman is worth less if shes not a virgin


Not exactly worthless but according to them are damaged goods
Original post by Ekemini
Sorry but why. I don't think people will see it as much that's why I put it here. :frown:


Because it's about men liking virgin women. A societal issue...

Also, chat is not meant to be a dumping ground.
Reply 150
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Original post by clh_hilary
Of course not, with your 'we value values' comment you're simply saying nobody else has values.


Ok I can see how it must have sounded. Thanks for pointing that out
Reply 151
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Original post by The_Internet
Because it's about men liking virgin women. A societal issue...

Also, chat is not meant to be a dumping ground.


What do you mean by dumping ground. I didn't dump it in chats I just thought more people would see it in chats
Original post by Ekemini
Not exactly worthless but according to them are damaged goods


according to who? men that want to keep women in their place? honestly i cant even be arsed to explain, women should be equal to men but the view that theyre 'damaged goods' just sums it up.

im not up for writing a whole essay on it but you should definitely read up on feminism.

everyone has their own choices and opinions, whether you have sex or not is your choice but you shouldnt judge others for it.
Go Ibiza and you can get that yummy sausage every night!!! :biggrin: :tongue:

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Original post by Fideo
It's harder for a man to sleep around.


Partly because women are looked down upon if they have more than a few one-night stands. It's a bit circular.
Original post by Eva.Gregoria
The same men judging her about not begin a virgin all slept around too. Why aren't they shamed as well?


Because they live in a country more unequal and ****ed up than ours.


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Reply 156
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Original post by luuucyx
according to who? men that want to keep women in their place? honestly i cant even be arsed to explain, women should be equal to men but the view that theyre 'damaged goods' just sums it up.

im not up for writing a whole essay on it but you should definitely read up on feminism.

everyone has their own choices and opinions, whether you have sex or not is your choice but you shouldnt judge others for it.


According to elders, my parents, the adults. I did not say non virgins are damaged goods. Its not my opinion cause I basically don't care if you are a virgin or not. Don't take this personally but reading feminism, I have a feeling might give me a headache because from the little things I have seen I don't think I understand it. For example i saw a picture somewhere where a girl claiming to be a feminist said that you don't have to touch a woman to rape her. I couldn't believe my eyes.
Original post by luuucyx
yeah exactly, im a proper puppy when im in love but its reciprocated too.

hahahahahaha i have never heard the term man-children before that is definitely one im keeping! yeah definitely, but im talking about like 22/23 year old guys lool.


can you explain how they have no back-bone etc.? Is it being unfaithful or unemployed etc.?
Reply 158
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Original post by Kabloomybuzz
Nope, not necessarily. If you're referring to the expectation that women bleed when they lose their "virginity" its not always the case. It actually shouldn't be the case.

You're unlikely to find many here who agree with you as its users are largely westernised.

Social and cultural values are largely arbitrary. They have no objective meaning. Just because your dad says this it doesn't mean he is right or that you have to agree.

I know that. Its not everything that he says that I agree. I think it all boils down to dignity.
Original post by Ekemini
According to elders, my parents, the adults. I did not say non virgins are damaged goods. Its not my opinion cause I basically don't care if you are a virgin or not. Don't take this personally but reading feminism, I have a feeling might give me a headache because from the little things I have seen I don't think I understand it. For example i saw a picture somewhere where a girl claiming to be a feminist said that you don't have to touch a woman to rape her. I couldn't believe my eyes.


yeah feminism is a bit of a wide net, theres a lot of stuff its a case of making your mind up on what you agree with and what you dont.

there are extreme feminists and stuff like the one you saw was in that court

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