The Student Room Group

Advice on a girl

There's this girl in my year, in my chemistry class that I used to get on with fairly well, we'd speak in lesson and I got on well with her friends too. One day, for no apparent reason, she just stopped talking to me around Easter last year(by that I mean she didn't even say a word and simply grunted whenever I asked her something). I tried speaking with her to ask her why but she simply ignored me, her friends still speak with me and have no idea either- even they say it's hard to figure out what she's thinking half the time.

Any advice would be appreciated...

Scroll to see replies

Reply 1
Original post by Anonymous
There's this girl in my year, in my chemistry class that I used to get on with fairly well, we'd speak in lesson and I got on well with her friends too. One day, for no apparent reason, she just stopped talking to me around Easter last year(by that I mean she didn't even say a word and simply grunted whenever I asked her something). I tried speaking with her to ask her why but she simply ignored me, her friends still speak with me and have no idea either- even they say it's hard to figure out what she's thinking half the time.

Any advice would be appreciated...

Write down how you feel in a letter and why you like her and why she isn't talking, how it's affecting you and then ask her to read it, if she says no, then secretly slip it into her bag.
Reply 2
Original post by kumon
Write down how you feel in a letter and why you like her and why she isn't talking, how it's affecting you and then ask her to read it, if she says no, then secretly slip it into her bag.


Seriously??
Try getting her alone and ask why?
just move on, if shes not talking/avoiding/being hostile to you then you need to get over her.

there's plenty of girls that will want to talk and spend time with you so go and find that girl
Psst: "She's weird."
Im a girl and realised i was doing what she is doing to you, to a boy who liked me alot.
Im not a biatch, i actually care about people's feelings alot. Its just i am not attracted to him at all, he comes off as really clingy and is kind of a stalker. Therefore the only way of getting him to back off was to distance myself from him. Its kind of working though.
She is subtly indicating that you should back off, sorry to put it bluntly. Sometimes people just are not attracted to you like you are to them.
You can find better who will appreciate you for you.
Reply 7
Original post by dancingtillday
Im a girl and realised i was doing what she is doing to you, to a boy who liked me alot.
Im not a biatch, i actually care about people's feelings alot. Its just i am not attracted to him at all, he comes off as really clingy and is kind of a stalker. Therefore the only way of getting him to back off was to distance myself from him. Its kind of working though.
She is subtly indicating that you should back off, sorry to put it bluntly. Sometimes people just are not attracted to you like you are to them.
You can find better who will appreciate you for you.


Thanks, that was really appreciated!
Yeah, I'd recently moved to the sixth form and I was getting to know everyone, a few people said to stay away because she's supposed to be stuck up, personally I didn't see that in her. I don't know, I just really tried to be nice(I mean, she's attractive but she seems okay, personality means more to me than looks!) and somewhere it all went wrong. I keep telling myself that I hate her, then as soon as I see her again I think "oh god, no I don't" uhoh! She even sits on a table with everyone that I get on really well with in the rest of my year, which makes chemistry lessons awkward!
Thanks for your advice :smile: I noticed this is your first post, are you at sixth form? What are you studying? There are some brilliant threads on here!

If I can offer you advice, speak to the guy/boy you're avoiding, I doubt he means to! You may even have more in common than you realise? Just a thought :smile: You never know if you don't speak to someone
Reply 8
Original post by MrsSheldonCooper
Try getting her alone and ask why?


Original post by scriberg
just move on, if shes not talking/avoiding/being hostile to you then you need to get over her.

there's plenty of girls that will want to talk and spend time with you so go and find that girl


We spoke privately once or twice last year, but that didn't exactly amount to much of a conclusion. I have a nosey brother and cousin who would make fun /.\

True, there are plenty and I do get on really well with lots, but the one I actually want to get on with and I can't, slight irony!
Reply 9
Original post by shawn_o1
Psst: "She's weird."


Original post by dancingtillday
x


sawn_o1 : That's not a bad thing :wink:

dancingtillday : I'm not a clingy person, I just hate not knowing what I've done..I'm the sort or person that would rather everyone I know be happy than happy myself, it's a strange way of looking at life. She gets a bit arsey with me if I speak to her friends but I often exchange a smile or have a short conversation with one or two behind her back and they seem to be friendly towards me(one even gave me a Christmas card! At the beginning of last year her closest friend said that we'd make a cute couple(before I was in any way interested in her)). I often formulate a list of things I would say in a conversation, how she'd react, but whenever we used to speak I never could, my mouth always dried up and I felt as if I was going to faint half the time!
Thanks for your advice though, I guess I'll just have to wait and see. There's hardly any point in trying to talk to her if what you say is true.
Reply 10
**** that bitch why u wastin time on moody hoes
Original post by Rstlss
**** that bitch why u wastin time on moody hoes


these hoes aint loyal :hand:
Original post by Anonymous
There's this girl in my year, in my chemistry class that I used to get on with fairly well, we'd speak in lesson and I got on well with her friends too. One day, for no apparent reason, she just stopped talking to me around Easter last year(by that I mean she didn't even say a word and simply grunted whenever I asked her something). I tried speaking with her to ask her why but she simply ignored me, her friends still speak with me and have no idea either- even they say it's hard to figure out what she's thinking half the time.

Any advice would be appreciated...


Text her(if you have her number) asking what's wrong? I think you have a right to know why she would suddenly cut you off like that.
Original post by Emily.97
Text her(if you have her number) asking what's wrong? I think you have a right to know why she would suddenly cut you off like that.


if you were avoiding a guy, would you want him to text you?
Original post by scriberg
if you were avoiding a guy, would you want him to text you?


Completely depends on the situation. If he had made me really angry about something or betrayed me in some way, I guess I wouldn't wanna talk to him, but in this scenario there doesn't appear to be an obvious reason for her behaviour, unless you're not telling us something youve done.

Sometimes people need to be encouraged to open up about what's wrong.
Reply 15
don't pay any attention to her. If she cared, she would've made the effort. But clearly she doesn't so mooooooove on man.
Original post by Emily.97
Completely depends on the situation. If he had made me really angry about something or betrayed me in some way, I guess I wouldn't wanna talk to him, but in this scenario there doesn't appear to be an obvious reason for her behaviour, unless you're not telling us something youve done.

Sometimes people need to be encouraged to open up about what's wrong.


Nothing that I know of! At least, I don't think so, I tended to avoid her too and not speak to her directly in Chemistry when we were on the same table last year, I had to to go between her and another girl to help the other girl with a question, she physically got up and moved seat and then moved back after I'd walked over to the other side of the class to ask a friend about the question, before returning to where I sat on the table next to hers
Original post by Anonymous
Nothing that I know of! At least, I don't think so, I tended to avoid her too and not speak to her directly in Chemistry when we were on the same table last year, I had to to go between her and another girl to help the other girl with a question, she physically got up and moved seat and then moved back after I'd walked over to the other side of the class to ask a friend about the question, before returning to where I sat on the table next to hers


Woah. Thats odd.
Is she the kind of person who does stuff like this? As in..is she quite stubborn or rude generally? She may be oblivious to the fact that this is affecting you. Maybe she is suddenly preoccupied with other friends. Sometimes people will stop talking to you, regardless of the fact that you've done nothing wrong. I've been in a situation where someone has stopped talking to me because they're busy chatting with other people, and I'm invisible! If that's the case, she's not worthit.
Original post by Emily.97
Woah. Thats odd.
Is she the kind of person who does stuff like this? As in..is she quite stubborn or rude generally? She may be oblivious to the fact that this is affecting you. Maybe she is suddenly preoccupied with other friends. Sometimes people will stop talking to you, regardless of the fact that you've done nothing wrong. I've been in a situation where someone has stopped talking to me because they're busy chatting with other people, and I'm invisible! If that's the case, she's not worthit.


Um....when we were on the same table last year we spoke about all sorts, she wasn't the chattiest, but she engaged in conversation. Then one day she just seemed to start grunting and shrugging her shoulders, now it takes me repeating a question three times to actually get a simple yes or no(only tried that once..never again..!).
When I was getting to know my new classmates(I moved to the sixth form that's part of a school at the start of year 12) I asked everyone about everyone and most people said she was a stuck up cow, I thought she seemed okay though. I gave her a christmas card last year, her friend(who until recently I was also really good friends with- she has a boyfriend so don't go down any jealousy route) said she said it was really sweet of me.
In terms of talking outside of school, she doesn't have Facebook and doesn't tend to go out much from what I understand from talking to her friends.
Original post by Anonymous
Um....when we were on the same table last year we spoke about all sorts, she wasn't the chattiest, but she engaged in conversation. Then one day she just seemed to start grunting and shrugging her shoulders, now it takes me repeating a question three times to actually get a simple yes or no(only tried that once..never again..!).
When I was getting to know my new classmates(I moved to the sixth form that's part of a school at the start of year 12) I asked everyone about everyone and most people said she was a stuck up cow, I thought she seemed okay though. I gave her a christmas card last year, her friend(who until recently I was also really good friends with- she has a boyfriend so don't go down any jealousy route) said she said it was really sweet of me.
In terms of talking outside of school, she doesn't have Facebook and doesn't tend to go out much from what I understand from talking to her friends.

Wouldn't have accused you of being jealous :/.

Its completely up to you. You can either ask her, like I said, or just let it be.

Quick Reply

Latest