Onine dating?

I have just singed up to a dating site...after many months of deliberation. Ive had no luck in 'real life', and wondering if people thing onlne dating is for people who are 'desepearte' or 'losers, who cant find anyone?'. Whats your thoughts or expereinces with onlne dating?

Reply 1

shawn_o1

Yep, it IS for desperate losers who can't find anyone. "No luck in real life"? Keep trying in real life. Clubs, societies, even taking up a sport will get you in social situations more often.

Reply 2

JulietheCat

From my experience, it's a million times harder to find someone decent on an online dating site than in real life.

You're better off finding someone in real life.

Reply 3

PeanutAvenger

I've no experience in online dating before nor am I ever going to try it. I haven't had "luck" too finding a real relationship but that doesn't mean that you should resolve to online dating. I know I wouldn't, because I'm very traditional and I'd like to meet someone special some day and hope to tell the story to people in the future. I definitely would not like to tell the story of how I met my lover through online. That wouldn't be much of a story now would it? Anyways, I'm not here to demotivate you but I've a relative who met her lover over online. He lives in India, far away from where we live and they're married now. It is definitely possible to settle down and meet someone over the internet. If you have had "no luck" in real life, maybe you should break it down to the problems you think that might have caused this "no luck"? Is it social anxiety?

But then again, different strokes for different folks. If you're more comfortable meeting someone new over internet chats, go for it. It doesn't mean you're a loser or you're desperate for love, it just means you're trying a new alternative. Just ask have any more questions, hope this helps!

Reply 4

username234673

I've had some nice dates from online dating. Never got too far with any of them - internet and real life are quite different, but still, met some people, went places I wouldn't normally go, did things I wouldn't normally do. Job's a good un.

Reply 5

channies

I know someone who met their bf online and they've been going out for 2 years

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Reply 6

Alsklinq

I've tried it, but through online gaming and not one of those dating profiles.
Its not for everyone if I were to be honest. I'd recommend you to ditch the online profiles and just go out, meet new people, socialise etc. I think its better to meet someone first then choose to whether you want to pursue some sort of relationship with them or not. With online dating websites, you're just looking for someone suitable rather than falling in love with them. There's a big difference.

Reply 7

Illegal Algebra

Online dating is stupid. For every woman on there, there are 20 men. So the ratio of male to female is absolutely ridiculous and pretty much guarantees that every single woman (yes, including the ugly ones) gets about 50 messages a day from desperate guys asking for sex, which drives the women away, reducing the number of ladies even further. It's a silly idea, it's a waste of your time.

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Reply 8

Anonymous #1

Wow haha I didn't realise there was so much negativity attached to online dating! I see what you guys mean, the thing is my self confidence is so low right now. I just met a guy , we went out and he showed so much interest in me. I got no messege about 24 hours later I messeged him and he's giving me one word answers. He's done this before we met and stuff but I thought after meeting me he may like me or something . So I'm feeling really down about this and joined it ... I'm 24 and haven't met any one yet I feel like I'm running out of time ...

Reply 9

username94219

Tried it, no good. My advice - go real life, more than likely to find a decent person.

Reply 10

superwolf

Go to TSR meetups. :wink:

Countless one night stands and even full on relationships stem from a good old TSR meet up! :biggrin:

Reply 11

LeahLeeLee

Original post by Anonymous

I had problems finding someone to date in real life as well, two or three years back, mostly because I don't socialise much outside and also because I am picky with men I date. I've had a few online relationships, and I would say it's not something one resorts to.

I've been in.. four online relationships, and am still in one right now (pretty long-term, we've been going steady for over a year). My longest online relationship was 2 years plus. I would not recommend it to anyone, really, because it's frustrating and tests the limits of your patience and trust.

You've got to be really really careful with the people you meet and fall for online because they CAN and DO conceal their flaws. You see a nicer version of themselves, an image they can keep up for months and up to years.

I'd say if it happens (that you meet your significant other) online, then give it a shot. But actually scouring the internet for someone isn't something I'd recommend because it doesn't work (talking from experience, I did try it at one point).

All the best! :smile:

Reply 12

Grantland

I don't reckon it counts, but I met with two people I talked to on Tinder, and while it never evolved beyond that it was nice to meet people who I'd probably never meet, if that makes sense. Try it, but don't give up on meeting people in person.

Reply 13

<3Music

Original post by Anonymous

Although I will admit that meeting people in person through social events etc is probably the best way to meet someone, as you know what you're getting etc.

Having said that .. I've often struggled meeting people in the conventional way and the few I have met have never progressed into something serious.

No I've never tried online dating.. but I did meet my boyfriend online. Started speaking in the August 2013, met in the November 2013 he moved from his home in the Midlands to the South to be with me in the February 2014 and we are still together now. He is my first long term proper boyfriend and we have been through so much together but have made it work. So yes it is do-able just be cautious and don't go into it with high expectations.. just see what happens.

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Reply 14

Anonymous #2

Original post by LeahLeeLee

Just out of curiosity, what online dating websites did you use?

Reply 15

Jgco2chem

Original post by Grantland

How long did it take, to get liked?
because I'm on tinder for a couple of weeks and nothing... :frown:

Reply 16

shawn_o1

Original post by Jgco2chem

How long did it take, to get liked?
because I'm on tinder for a couple of weeks and nothing... :frown:

If you're male you have no hope. Very few women are on dating sites for the reasons above

Reply 17

LeahLeeLee

Original post by Anonymous

Just out of curiosity, what online dating websites did you use?

Well, it was some teen-chat site thingy with my first online boyfriend, some chatroom years ago. The second was Facebook, he was a mutual friend of mine with a senior in my school (matchmaking senior lol), third was Twitter (he often tweeted me in the middle of the night, both of us don't sleep much) and my current boyfriend was from interpals.net (a site for pen-pals, but I've met couples who met each other from there, my boyfriend met his ex there as well)

I would recommend finding people from sites NOT specifically tailored to dating, because that seems more niche and can be a bit desperate, in my opinion. :biggrin:

Reply 18

Sam Walters

Original post by shawn_o1

Yep, it IS for desperate losers who can't find anyone. "No luck in real life"? Keep trying in real life. Clubs, societies, even taking up a sport will get you in social situations more often.

So people with social anxiety are desperate losers? Those whom have the common sense to realise its a very convenient way of connecting with people whom are also try thier luck out in town are also losers?

Yeh okay mate. I think you should crawl back inside the hole you came from.

My opnion on online dating. Crack on with it. It cant hurt now can it.

Only issue for guys is that unlike real life it does matter what you look like. In real life as long as you don't look like a yeti its not too bad once you have a grip on yourself and you know how to present yourself and control situations.

Reply 19

Grantland

Original post by Jgco2chem

How long did it take, to get liked?
because I'm on tinder for a couple of weeks and nothing... :frown:

I'm no looker myself so it took a while, keep in mind that Tinder can be poison to your self esteem when you swipe for ages and get no responses. Just remember that it is based entirely on a photo, and isn't representative of your ability to meet peeps in person.