I don't want anything to do with my family. Am I a bad person? PLEASE READ AD HELPi
Hey guys, basically it's a LONG story I'll try my hardest to condense.
I'm 17, I've never had a Dad, he was in Jail when I was old enough to say "Dad" and he was an drug addict so when I was younger he would take me and my sisters to drug dens when we were staying with him, luckily my mum stopped it and I'm the only one who was old enough then that it stuck in my memory so they don't remember. Because of this, my Mum's family and Dad's family have NEVER MET in front of me in these 17 years and since I'm on my mum's side- they would always be disappointed if I ever asked about contacting my other side and to add to that, my dad's side is black so not only a family divide, but a racial divide in myself.
I never had a mum either, a drug addict too, I can't remember much before I was 12 since my childhood was filled with her bringing home strange men and even hiding men in the house when she KNEW that me and my sisters might be taken off her for it. There hasn't been a single year I've been alive where she's been clean.
Now the catalyst to me realising my true feelings towards my family came to light 2 days ago...
My sister overheard my mum ordering drugs on the phone(Morphine) when we thought she was clean all this time which started a family fight and I live with my Grandparents(who moan at me and take out their frustrations over my Mum on me) I assumed they'd finally get off their asses and take her to rehab since they KNOW the damage she's done to my sister's and I -I have depression, anxiety and really bad paranoia and my sister's are the same- but they didn't...
After they ran from my Mum's to here, my grandparents sent my sister's back home without a care even though they knew they were sending them back to an unstable junkie. And that was it.
I realised that I suffered through all these 17years because even though EVERYONE IN MY FAMILY KNEW WHAT WE WERE GOING THROUGH THEY DIDN'T AND STILL HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING BECAUSE IT'S A HASSLE.
I now have depression and a laundry list of mental illnesses which has made making friends near impossible(I currently have no friends) and I also have horrid, suppressed memories which my sister's will end up with as well, all because no one in the family wanted to go through a few months of hassle to fix it.
I blame them. I trusted them and they turned their back on me. I want nothing to do with them, but I want to be a good person which is why I'm here. IM SORRY IT'S SO LONG, BUT PLEASE, AM I A BAD PERSON? IS THIS RIGHT TO FEEL LIKE THIS? I NEED HELP, PLEASE, ANYONE?
I'm 17, I've never had a Dad, he was in Jail when I was old enough to say "Dad" and he was an drug addict so when I was younger he would take me and my sisters to drug dens when we were staying with him, luckily my mum stopped it and I'm the only one who was old enough then that it stuck in my memory so they don't remember. Because of this, my Mum's family and Dad's family have NEVER MET in front of me in these 17 years and since I'm on my mum's side- they would always be disappointed if I ever asked about contacting my other side and to add to that, my dad's side is black so not only a family divide, but a racial divide in myself.
I never had a mum either, a drug addict too, I can't remember much before I was 12 since my childhood was filled with her bringing home strange men and even hiding men in the house when she KNEW that me and my sisters might be taken off her for it. There hasn't been a single year I've been alive where she's been clean.
Now the catalyst to me realising my true feelings towards my family came to light 2 days ago...
My sister overheard my mum ordering drugs on the phone(Morphine) when we thought she was clean all this time which started a family fight and I live with my Grandparents(who moan at me and take out their frustrations over my Mum on me) I assumed they'd finally get off their asses and take her to rehab since they KNOW the damage she's done to my sister's and I -I have depression, anxiety and really bad paranoia and my sister's are the same- but they didn't...
After they ran from my Mum's to here, my grandparents sent my sister's back home without a care even though they knew they were sending them back to an unstable junkie. And that was it.
I realised that I suffered through all these 17years because even though EVERYONE IN MY FAMILY KNEW WHAT WE WERE GOING THROUGH THEY DIDN'T AND STILL HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING BECAUSE IT'S A HASSLE.
I now have depression and a laundry list of mental illnesses which has made making friends near impossible(I currently have no friends) and I also have horrid, suppressed memories which my sister's will end up with as well, all because no one in the family wanted to go through a few months of hassle to fix it.
I blame them. I trusted them and they turned their back on me. I want nothing to do with them, but I want to be a good person which is why I'm here. IM SORRY IT'S SO LONG, BUT PLEASE, AM I A BAD PERSON? IS THIS RIGHT TO FEEL LIKE THIS? I NEED HELP, PLEASE, ANYONE?
Definitely no if you didn't hurt others. Cheer up and try to make more friends. Life is not easy but you can find the bright aspect of life if you are optimistic. Fortunately, you're almost an adult, so basically, you are safe and you can feed on yourself. Throw the hassles away and good luck!
Posted from TSR Mobile
Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by TheHumanParadox
Hey guys, basically it's a LONG story I'll try my hardest to condense.
I'm 17, I've never had a Dad, he was in Jail when I was old enough to say "Dad" and he was an drug addict so when I was younger he would take me and my sisters to drug dens when we were staying with him, luckily my mum stopped it and I'm the only one who was old enough then that it stuck in my memory so they don't remember. Because of this, my Mum's family and Dad's family have NEVER MET in front of me in these 17 years and since I'm on my mum's side- they would always be disappointed if I ever asked about contacting my other side and to add to that, my dad's side is black so not only a family divide, but a racial divide in myself.
I never had a mum either, a drug addict too, I can't remember much before I was 12 since my childhood was filled with her bringing home strange men and even hiding men in the house when she KNEW that me and my sisters might be taken off her for it. There hasn't been a single year I've been alive where she's been clean.
Now the catalyst to me realising my true feelings towards my family came to light 2 days ago...
My sister overheard my mum ordering drugs on the phone(Morphine) when we thought she was clean all this time which started a family fight and I live with my Grandparents(who moan at me and take out their frustrations over my Mum on me) I assumed they'd finally get off their asses and take her to rehab since they KNOW the damage she's done to my sister's and I -I have depression, anxiety and really bad paranoia and my sister's are the same- but they didn't...
After they ran from my Mum's to here, my grandparents sent my sister's back home without a care even though they knew they were sending them back to an unstable junkie. And that was it.
I realised that I suffered through all these 17years because even though EVERYONE IN MY FAMILY KNEW WHAT WE WERE GOING THROUGH THEY DIDN'T AND STILL HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING BECAUSE IT'S A HASSLE.
I now have depression and a laundry list of mental illnesses which has made making friends near impossible(I currently have no friends) and I also have horrid, suppressed memories which my sister's will end up with as well, all because no one in the family wanted to go through a few months of hassle to fix it.
I blame them. I trusted them and they turned their back on me. I want nothing to do with them, but I want to be a good person which is why I'm here. IM SORRY IT'S SO LONG, BUT PLEASE, AM I A BAD PERSON? IS THIS RIGHT TO FEEL LIKE THIS? I NEED HELP, PLEASE, ANYONE?
I'm 17, I've never had a Dad, he was in Jail when I was old enough to say "Dad" and he was an drug addict so when I was younger he would take me and my sisters to drug dens when we were staying with him, luckily my mum stopped it and I'm the only one who was old enough then that it stuck in my memory so they don't remember. Because of this, my Mum's family and Dad's family have NEVER MET in front of me in these 17 years and since I'm on my mum's side- they would always be disappointed if I ever asked about contacting my other side and to add to that, my dad's side is black so not only a family divide, but a racial divide in myself.
I never had a mum either, a drug addict too, I can't remember much before I was 12 since my childhood was filled with her bringing home strange men and even hiding men in the house when she KNEW that me and my sisters might be taken off her for it. There hasn't been a single year I've been alive where she's been clean.
Now the catalyst to me realising my true feelings towards my family came to light 2 days ago...
My sister overheard my mum ordering drugs on the phone(Morphine) when we thought she was clean all this time which started a family fight and I live with my Grandparents(who moan at me and take out their frustrations over my Mum on me) I assumed they'd finally get off their asses and take her to rehab since they KNOW the damage she's done to my sister's and I -I have depression, anxiety and really bad paranoia and my sister's are the same- but they didn't...
After they ran from my Mum's to here, my grandparents sent my sister's back home without a care even though they knew they were sending them back to an unstable junkie. And that was it.
I realised that I suffered through all these 17years because even though EVERYONE IN MY FAMILY KNEW WHAT WE WERE GOING THROUGH THEY DIDN'T AND STILL HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING BECAUSE IT'S A HASSLE.
I now have depression and a laundry list of mental illnesses which has made making friends near impossible(I currently have no friends) and I also have horrid, suppressed memories which my sister's will end up with as well, all because no one in the family wanted to go through a few months of hassle to fix it.
I blame them. I trusted them and they turned their back on me. I want nothing to do with them, but I want to be a good person which is why I'm here. IM SORRY IT'S SO LONG, BUT PLEASE, AM I A BAD PERSON? IS THIS RIGHT TO FEEL LIKE THIS? I NEED HELP, PLEASE, ANYONE?
First and foremost it's a shame to see someone so young suffering mentally, the things people go through as a child scars them as adults. In regards to your mental state the best advice is to soul search, learn what you want to do in life, make a life and work towards that.
In regards to having nothing to do with your family I think it's time you all sat down and settle the differences or issues that have been going on. It's better to be open about it rather than spend days thinking about it. Your grandmother being the eldest should really be trying to keep your family together.
I'd say you're justified, assuming there's nothing important that you've missed out. **** 'em.
Original post by shangboyang
Definitely no if you didn't hurt others. Cheer up and try to make more friends. Life is not easy but you can find the bright aspect of life if you are optimistic. Fortunately, you're almost an adult, so basically, you are safe and you can feed on yourself. Throw the hassles away and good luck!
Posted from TSR Mobile
Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by Moh.1Ace
First and foremost it's a shame to see someone so young suffering mentally, the things people go through as a child scars them as adults. In regards to your mental state the best advice is to soul search, learn what you want to do in life, make a life and work towards that.
In regards to having nothing to do with your family I think it's time you all sat down and settle the differences or issues that have been going on. It's better to be open about it rather than spend days thinking about it. Your grandmother being the eldest should really be trying to keep your family together.
In regards to having nothing to do with your family I think it's time you all sat down and settle the differences or issues that have been going on. It's better to be open about it rather than spend days thinking about it. Your grandmother being the eldest should really be trying to keep your family together.
Original post by SnoochToTheBooch
I'd say you're justified, assuming there's nothing important that you've missed out. **** 'em.
Original post by TheHumanParadox
Hey guys, basically it's a LONG story I'll try my hardest to condense.
I'm 17, I've never had a Dad, he was in Jail when I was old enough to say "Dad" and he was an drug addict so when I was younger he would take me and my sisters to drug dens when we were staying with him, luckily my mum stopped it and I'm the only one who was old enough then that it stuck in my memory so they don't remember. Because of this, my Mum's family and Dad's family have NEVER MET in front of me in these 17 years and since I'm on my mum's side- they would always be disappointed if I ever asked about contacting my other side and to add to that, my dad's side is black so not only a family divide, but a racial divide in myself.
I never had a mum either, a drug addict too, I can't remember much before I was 12 since my childhood was filled with her bringing home strange men and even hiding men in the house when she KNEW that me and my sisters might be taken off her for it. There hasn't been a single year I've been alive where she's been clean.
Now the catalyst to me realising my true feelings towards my family came to light 2 days ago...
My sister overheard my mum ordering drugs on the phone(Morphine) when we thought she was clean all this time which started a family fight and I live with my Grandparents(who moan at me and take out their frustrations over my Mum on me) I assumed they'd finally get off their asses and take her to rehab since they KNOW the damage she's done to my sister's and I -I have depression, anxiety and really bad paranoia and my sister's are the same- but they didn't...
After they ran from my Mum's to here, my grandparents sent my sister's back home without a care even though they knew they were sending them back to an unstable junkie. And that was it.
I realised that I suffered through all these 17years because even though EVERYONE IN MY FAMILY KNEW WHAT WE WERE GOING THROUGH THEY DIDN'T AND STILL HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING BECAUSE IT'S A HASSLE.
I now have depression and a laundry list of mental illnesses which has made making friends near impossible(I currently have no friends) and I also have horrid, suppressed memories which my sister's will end up with as well, all because no one in the family wanted to go through a few months of hassle to fix it.
I blame them. I trusted them and they turned their back on me. I want nothing to do with them, but I want to be a good person which is why I'm here. IM SORRY IT'S SO LONG, BUT PLEASE, AM I A BAD PERSON? IS THIS RIGHT TO FEEL LIKE THIS? I NEED HELP, PLEASE, ANYONE?
I'm 17, I've never had a Dad, he was in Jail when I was old enough to say "Dad" and he was an drug addict so when I was younger he would take me and my sisters to drug dens when we were staying with him, luckily my mum stopped it and I'm the only one who was old enough then that it stuck in my memory so they don't remember. Because of this, my Mum's family and Dad's family have NEVER MET in front of me in these 17 years and since I'm on my mum's side- they would always be disappointed if I ever asked about contacting my other side and to add to that, my dad's side is black so not only a family divide, but a racial divide in myself.
I never had a mum either, a drug addict too, I can't remember much before I was 12 since my childhood was filled with her bringing home strange men and even hiding men in the house when she KNEW that me and my sisters might be taken off her for it. There hasn't been a single year I've been alive where she's been clean.
Now the catalyst to me realising my true feelings towards my family came to light 2 days ago...
My sister overheard my mum ordering drugs on the phone(Morphine) when we thought she was clean all this time which started a family fight and I live with my Grandparents(who moan at me and take out their frustrations over my Mum on me) I assumed they'd finally get off their asses and take her to rehab since they KNOW the damage she's done to my sister's and I -I have depression, anxiety and really bad paranoia and my sister's are the same- but they didn't...
After they ran from my Mum's to here, my grandparents sent my sister's back home without a care even though they knew they were sending them back to an unstable junkie. And that was it.
I realised that I suffered through all these 17years because even though EVERYONE IN MY FAMILY KNEW WHAT WE WERE GOING THROUGH THEY DIDN'T AND STILL HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING BECAUSE IT'S A HASSLE.
I now have depression and a laundry list of mental illnesses which has made making friends near impossible(I currently have no friends) and I also have horrid, suppressed memories which my sister's will end up with as well, all because no one in the family wanted to go through a few months of hassle to fix it.
I blame them. I trusted them and they turned their back on me. I want nothing to do with them, but I want to be a good person which is why I'm here. IM SORRY IT'S SO LONG, BUT PLEASE, AM I A BAD PERSON? IS THIS RIGHT TO FEEL LIKE THIS? I NEED HELP, PLEASE, ANYONE?
I am so sorry and wish i could take you out of a situation. Unfortunately life doesnt always work out the way it does in my novels. I wish you had at least one adult who could take and your sisters in or a gorgeous rich boy who would fall in love with you and bail you and your sisters out of this. Atlast your life isnt a Carter Reed novel but i wish you well. I feel like strangling your bloody family members. FAMILY my ASS
(edited 9 years ago)
Original post by Ekemini
I am so sorry and wish i could take you out of a situation. Unfortunately life doesnt always work out the way it does in my novels. I wish you had at least one adult who could take and your sisters in or a gorgeous rich boy who would fall in love with you and bail you and your sisters out of this. Atlast your life isnt a Carter Reed novel but i wish you well. I feel like strangling your bloody family members. FAMILY my ASS
Original post by Puresha
You are most definitely not a bad person at all:') its completely understandable love x
It means a lot to have someone understand and be on my side for once, thank you!Original post by Rimmie
You poor thing, no one deserves to be treated like that
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