Embarrassed and depressed I'm not a doctor!

I used to be a medical student. I hated the course and university, and I dropped out. Truth is I didn't enjoy the course or the hospital placements. I also felt bad that I hated the course and while my coursemates seemed to be passionate about it.

I decided to try something else. I did engineering. While I don't hate it, don't really love it. I was interested a bit in the first year, but I've lost interest so to speak to some degree.

For some reason lately I really feel bothered about dropping out of medical school lately. Maybe I made a mistake. Not the helping of others, I do plenty of volunteer work (which I love far more than Engineering or Medicine, it's actually the reason I wanted to become a doctor in the first place). But the prestige and the guaranteed employment. I'm petrified of not getting a secure job with engineering (even though job prospects are good, but there is that small possibility that scares me), and the prospect of working for someone else doesn't thrill me. I keep comparing myself to others (I know I shouldn't), and for some reason, me not being a doctor, I feel a bit inferior. It's the feeling of being judged which makes me feel insecure. I've got problems with anxiety, perhaps the way I think like that, I'm sorry if I offend people here. I don't see engineers as inferior, it's a different job. But for some reason me being an engineer makes me feel inferior, because I'm scared I'll be seen inferior to the doctor. It's messed up my mind :frown:

. Also the fact think my parents feel a bit disappointed I'm not a doctor.

Hence I'm kind of feeling maybe I should of grin and beared it through. I don't see any job, career that I would love unfortunately, I really want to love a university course/career. My interest just wains away. But things like reputation, feeling important just weigh on my mind all the time (again perhaps the anxiety). Hence it makes me very sad. I wish I could love my course and love being an engineer. I just feel horrible and worthless, especially when I see my coursemates happy to be engineers or doctors. It makes me feel I don't deserve to be either.

Just feel really miserable in general, this issue plays on my mind all the time and makes me feel really anxious and horrible.

Anyone have any Thoughts or Advice? Please share!

Reply 1

lNurl

19

This post gave me anxiety and depression for graduating with a management degree, I guess I go and kill myself if engineers are seen inferior. I have no worth in this life. Why I am still breathing?

Reply 2

edsharon

1

I know at the moment it may seem like you made a bad decision by dropping out of medical school, but if you simly didn't enjoy the course and was not passionate about it, it was absolutely the right thing to do to drop out. Neither engingeers nor doctors are inferior or superior to one another, you just have to find the right career for you. With the support of your friends and family I'm sure you can get through this confusing time in your life, as well as getting help with your anxiety. In regards to deciding which career path to take, what do you enjoy? You clearly have the intelligence to pursue whichever career path you like and so your biggest hurdle is just deciding what you really enjoy and which career you could see yourself doing! I'm sure everything will work out in the end for you, after all, life happens while you're making other plans!

Good luck with everything, you will be fine :smile:

Reply 3

KrazyKoala

OP

6

Original post by edsharon

I know at the moment it may seem like you made a bad decision by dropping out of medical school, but if you simly didn't enjoy the course and was not passionate about it, it was absolutely the right thing to do to drop out. Neither engingeers nor doctors are inferior or superior to one another, you just have to find the right career for you. With the support of your friends and family I'm sure you can get through this confusing time in your life, as well as getting help with your anxiety. In regards to deciding which career path to take, what do you enjoy? You clearly have the intelligence to pursue whichever career path you like and so your biggest hurdle is just deciding what you really enjoy and which career you could see yourself doing! I'm sure everything will work out in the end for you, after all, life happens while you're making other plans!

Good luck with everything, you will be fine :smile:

Thanks for this post. :smile:

Embarrassed and depressed I'm not a doctor!

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