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I'm Muslim but I've realised I'm definitely bisexual...

em211997

Your assumption is that this world is meant to be the main place where we live and enjoy ourselves and feel peace and experience everything, thus you suggest God should intervene all the time and make the world perfect and remove everything that's bad, but this world is just a temporary place, and the main aim is to prepare for the afterlife. Whatever injustices occur in this world will be taken into account by God, both for the victim and the wrong-doer.

Then why do we even bother pursuing things on earth? Why do we go to school? Go to uni? Build relationships? Doesn't life seem like a waste to you? Just live life for the now and enjoy yourself while you can. If worshipping god makes you happy then go for it but at the same time you can't condemn or look down at people who want to live by their own rules and enjoy themselves. Life's too short for regrets, love who you want and live and let live!

Reply 321

Zamestaneh

21

Original post by em211997

Then why do we even bother pursuing things on earth? Why do we go to school? Go to uni? Build relationships? Doesn't life seem like a waste to you? Just live life for the now and enjoy yourself while you can. If worshipping god makes you happy then go for it but at the same time you can't condemn or look down at people who want to live by their own rules and enjoy themselves. Life's too short for regrets, love who you want and live and let live!

We pursue things on Earth to make life easier for ourselves and to seek a bit of pleasure whilst we strive towards the greater goal of Paradise - school and stuff makes it easier to achieve things here; living solely for the now is what causes people to make massive mistakes and also (from our perspective) bring about their own downfall in this life and the next.

Reply 322

em211997

18

Original post by Zamestaneh

We pursue things on Earth to make life easier for ourselves and to seek a bit of pleasure whilst we strive towards the greater goal of Paradise - school and stuff makes it easier to achieve things here; living solely for the now is what causes people to make massive mistakes and also (from our perspective) bring about their own downfall in this life and the next.

Fair enough but that's your opinion...I doubt we'll ever see eye to eye on this one.

Reply 323

Zamestaneh

21

Original post by em211997

Fair enough but that's your opinion...I doubt we'll ever see eye to eye on this one.

True; I used to think like you when I was agnostic but I guess perspective changes when I move to the other team :lol:

Reply 324

em211997

18

Original post by Zamestaneh

True; I used to think like you when I was agnostic but I guess perspective changes when I move to the other team :lol:

Very true thank you this conversion has been very enlightening.

Reply 325

Zargabaath

21

Original post by lydiafoof

Can you please answer my question I am genuinely curious

...i agree with you lol. I'm not the person who you were replying to, I didn't have any rep left so I couldn't +1 your post at the time

Reply 326

Moh.1Ace

1

Original post by em211997

If you think being gay is a choice you're basically saying that if you wanted to you could make yourself gay. So why haven't you tested out the theory?

because I'm straight duhhhh

Reply 327

Psych34

1

Well my partner is Muslim and gay.While it seems that he is doing an excellent job regarding acceptance of his sexual orientation we do have occasional clashes around religion.I am an atheist (really vocal about it- more like anti-religious) and I see that he has managed to bridge his faith and his sexual orientation in a unique way.Basically I think he uses a series of defence mechanisms that help him adapt.Anyhow whenever I challenge him on the views of mainstream Islam around homosexuality (among other things) we end up fighting so we made a deal not to talk about religion after a serious argument a few weeks ago.It seems to be working so far.

Reply 328

username940693

12

OP: I haven't read through all the posts, but it looks like this turned into a debate pretty quick, which I don't think is what you wanted? Anyway, gay Muslim girl here, so I'll say what I can. (Sorry for the long post, I tried to cover whatever I could!)

First off, your religion is yours. Not your family's. Not your mosque's. I know, so much of it is based around community, but at the end of the day, it's your faith. It's completely okay to decide that you can't believe (that's where I mostly am), but it's just as okay to continue believing. Neither of these things are determined by your sexuality, and it's always your decision.

The most important thing though is that you are not wrong. It may not seem that way, but there's nothing at all to feel guilty or ashamed about. Hopefully the guilt and confusion will pass and it'll change. In the meantime, though, if you have any close friends, try talking to them? Family is probably not an option, but coming out to a close friend really helped me.

Finally, there are lots, lots of resources out there for people who ID as LGBT and Muslim. No matter what anyone says, the two are not mutually exclusive! These are just a few:

Spoiler

I really hope you read this; and I really hope it helps. If you ever want to talk or anything, my PM box is always open! :smile:

Reply 329

xXdidoXx

Salam, I'm a bisexual Muslim girl and this entirely my sole view, opinion, and way of thinking.The Qur'an forbids I associate my justification for this 'sin' with the Qur'an itself, but I will be explaining and making references. I'm also no scholar of any sort, I'm just a regular teen that has gone through the basics everyone else has. My mother is a convert and my father is more traditional. With this is mind please continue:

The main reason bisexuality or homosexuality is considered haram is primarily because of the disagreement it causes within families, the detrimental affect it can have on your life if you cannot find acceptance from those around you (i.e. drop out of college, waste your days away only indulging in yourself, etc.), and diseases that can be caught through this practice. I however still do not see disease as a full reason since it can also be contracted through interaction with the opposite gender. Allah (swt)'s words are the most wise and are in our best interest, I agree with this. However, they are also a form of guidance. Guidance should be followed in the best way possible, but since I also believe God the most understanding, and unbiased, if you have good reason for committing homosexuality, it will likely be forgiven. But, also, you cannot let simple excuses get in the way of your worship. You may not allow your homo/bisexuality get in the way of your worship and everyday life. I know many people out there believe religion is bs, but I still have faith and love the first-world blessings I have received and am happy to say it might've been the only thing to move me on from depression and PTSD, despite the inherited blurbs out there, I chose this religion and it was not chosen for me. I also want to remind you that your fear is good and is out of not wanting to disappoint your creator, however, remember that God is Ar-Rahman (All Loving as a pregnant mother loves her fetus) Please, brother, do not indulge in only physical pleasure and remember your spirituality. Bless. (Assalamualakum)

Reply 330

Anonymous #19

Original post by Anonymous

Hi. I am a British Muslim guy and I'm not very practising -- like the only time I ever go to mosque is on Eid basically -- but my family is quite conservative and stuff. I know homosexuality is a sin in Islam but...for a long time now--ever since I've been a teenager I've always found guys attractive as well as girls but could never admit it.

Only since I've come to University away from my family environment -- in a city where no one knows me -- have I finally admitted to myself that I am bi after having a few sexual experiences (basically, the first time i met a guy on gaydar and he invited me to his place and we ended up having oral sex) and though I really enjoyed it I have been feeling full of guilt ever since but also get turned whenever i think about it to the extent that I repeated it a couple of times...once with the same guy and another time with him and his mate...

Now I feel really guilty and don't know if I should tell anyone, hide it, or just accept i am bi and live my life. But I am also scared of Hell so....!

Help!

Assalamualaikum my brother, Bismillah - I am not Muslim, but I have come to learn a lot about your faith and I highly respect your faith because it demands a lot of its followers. I believe in God - not the same way my Christian brothers believe in him, anyways that's a story for another day.

Now, like I have learnt about your faith, I cannot force you to do what I want you to do, but I can try and guide you and tell you what I believe you should do.

If you're afraid of being denied entrance into Jannah, then leave such sinful thoughts and get back on to the road that will steer away from eternal Ganeem or eternal hell fire.

Remember in the Quran it mentions that "those who, having done something to be ashamed of, or wronged their own souls, earnestly bring Allah to mind, and ask for forgiveness for their sins,- and who can forgive sins except Allah?" If you decide to stay away from indulging into sin with the opposite sex, make sure to ask Allah for forgiveness.

May I also remind you - Allah did not make you this way. You chose to become like this.

But brother, if you believe that what you feel in your heart to be correct and not be ashamed of. Come out. Let the world know of what YOU believe to be right. But brother be ready to be cast out from your community and family if you wish to go down this path. If you say that your family is strict with the ways of the Muslims then be ready to be cast out, especially if you're not ready to change.

I hope you find your answer and do what you believe to be right brother,
Baraka Allahu fika

Reply 331

Aladdinsaaane

1

Original post by Anonymous

Hi. I am a British Muslim guy and I'm not very practising -- like the only time I ever go to mosque is on Eid basically -- but my family is quite conservative and stuff. I know homosexuality is a sin in Islam but...for a long time now--ever since I've been a teenager I've always found guys attractive as well as girls but could never admit it.

Only since I've come to University away from my family environment -- in a city where no one knows me -- have I finally admitted to myself that I am bi after having a few sexual experiences (basically, the first time i met a guy on gaydar and he invited me to his place and we ended up having oral sex) and though I really enjoyed it I have been feeling full of guilt ever since but also get turned whenever i think about it to the extent that I repeated it a couple of times...once with the same guy and another time with him and his mate...

Now I feel really guilty and don't know if I should tell anyone, hide it, or just accept i am bi and live my life. But I am also scared of Hell so....!

Help!

Yes, you should accept yourself and live your life. There is nothing wrong with being gay. The problem isn't you, the problem is your family so you shouldn't have any problems with your sexuality, and if they do, that is their problem. You cannot live a life of lies and repression, as this will lead to mental health problems. There are plenty of people (in fact, the very vast majority of non-Muslim people) who will accept you and that is what matters.