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ex calls me out whenever he sees me, i feel scared

we don't have contact anymore. i split with him because of abuse/obsession. We live fairly close, and whenever he bumps into me, in his car, or walking past. He honks his horn and waves or he says 'hello' in a way that is not friendly, like haha look at you,i look scared, and i feel a bit scared.
i don't want him to knowledge me in this way, i feel intimidated. i'm always on my own walking to places. Should i say anything, the next time he does it? is it normal am i over-reacting?
Original post by Anonymous
we don't have contact anymore. i split with him because of abuse/obsession. We live fairly close, and whenever he bumps into me, in his car, or walking past. He honks his horn and waves or he says 'hello' in a way that is not friendly, like haha look at you,i look scared, and i feel a bit scared.
i don't want him to knowledge me in this way, i feel intimidated. i'm always on my own walking to places. Should i say anything, the next time he does it? is it normal am i over-reacting?


I would get in contact with him, indirectly or directly doesn't matter, and just let him know that you find his behaviour incredibly intimidating and that it's making you very uneasy. Also "threaten" him by saying that if he doesn't accept this, it's likely that you'll get the law involved.

You really do have to send this text, I think, because if he does continue to harass you, you'll have the text as proof that you tried to warn him ... and it'll help your case if it does (hopefully not) get out of hand.
Reply 2
Original post by VotreAltesse
I would get in contact with him, indirectly or directly doesn't matter, and just let him know that you find his behaviour incredibly intimidating and that it's making you very uneasy. Also "threaten" him by saying that if he doesn't accept this, it's likely that you'll get the law involved.

You really do have to send this text, I think, because if he does continue to harass you, you'll have the text as proof that you tried to warn him ... and it'll help your case if it does (hopefully not) get out of hand.


thanks very much :smile: i don't have his mobile but i could contact by facebook. thing is i am worried that he is doing this just so that i contact him? it could be a chance for him to be horrible to me, and he might say 'well you contacted me' (he can twist things) i ' ll have a look at the law, but its so indirect , my word against his. i wish i could just move :frown:
Original post by Anonymous
thanks very much :smile: i don't have his mobile but i could contact by facebook. thing is i am worried that he is doing this just so that i contact him? it could be a chance for him to be horrible to me, and he might say 'well you contacted me' (he can twist things) i ' ll have a look at the law, but its so indirect , my word against his. i wish i could just move :frown:



If you don't want to contact him yourself, then get a close friend to let him know.

You have to do this.
Okay - I don't think you should contact him at all!! He is your ex. He is your ex because you said there was some type of abuse and obsession in the past. The problem is your not dealing w/ a normal/rational guy. Contacting him and telling him you feel scared by his behavior will just feed him! Okay just reread the above post - maybe a text is not a bad idea to have on record but don't actually let him know you feel scared. He MAY apologize and be all sweet hoping you might come back around but once he knows you won't he'll only increase the intimidation. He absolutely wants you to feel intimidated. I would let others know this is happening. You might talk to your local police department and ask if there is any type of self protection device you can carry as you are walking alone a lot.
The next time it happens do not make eye contact and do not act afraid. It may take all the acting skills you have but do not act intimidated and again do not make eye contact. If he doesn't get a response - after a while of trying (sad to say) he'll move on.
It you feel he has the potential to literally, psychically harm you definitely go to the police. Good luck
Reply 5
Original post by hopeforthebest1
Okay - I don't think you should contact him at all!! He is your ex. He is your ex because you said there was some type of abuse and obsession in the past. The problem is your not dealing w/ a normal/rational guy. Contacting him and telling him you feel scared by his behavior will just feed him! Okay just reread the above post - maybe a text is not a bad idea to have on record but don't actually let him know you feel scared. He MAY apologize and be all sweet hoping you might come back around but once he knows you won't he'll only increase the intimidation. He absolutely wants you to feel intimidated. I would let others know this is happening. You might talk to your local police department and ask if there is any type of self protection device you can carry as you are walking alone a lot.
The next time it happens do not make eye contact and do not act afraid. It may take all the acting skills you have but do not act intimidated and again do not make eye contact. If he doesn't get a response - after a while of trying (sad to say) he'll move on.
It you feel he has the potential to literally, psychically harm you definitely go to the police. Good luck


thanks for advice . i think the next time it happens and it is really obvious, i will make contact and tell him he has to stop. its been a long time tho, like 2 years, and he has only just started doing this about 6 months ago.

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