I'm 16, he's 36.. AMA!

Hi everyone!

I've been reading all of these comments but haven't had a chance to reply. Obviously I'm not going to sit here and respond to every single response I've had to this thread, so I'll post what I want to say and hope that it gives you all a bit of a better understanding.

So, I've seen a few comments on what we have 'been through' together - now, obviously I haven't at any point specified what I meant by that, so I see my own mistake and will now clarify. We've had to fight tooth and nail to be together - we've dealt with police, social services, etc.. I mean, at one point, I had police taking the last two phones I had and search them for any kind of evidence that we'd been in a relationship before I was 15 or that I had been groomed. We'd both been spoken to separately, we'd had to deal with our families disagreeing, and so much more! The last few months have been absolutely horrific. The stress is unreal. If I was just being 'groomed' as some of you have put it, would he really go through all of that? I think not. I'd run a mile if I just wanted to sleep with a girl and had to deal with all of this for months on end. Even now, it's still not over. I still have to deal with police and social services, and other people. I see this as a lot to go through for a relatively new couple. Whether you agree or not doesn't really matter to me personally, because this is what I believe in.

Now, since some people are making a huge fuss over 'maturity' of us both - I'm mature. Sure, you probably laughed a little when you read that, but I am. I've been through a fair bit of ****. Obviously, that alone won't be a good enough response so let me expand on my point. I was sexually abused by an older male (not considerably older, but he was 16 and I was 11) for over a year. I was absolutely petrified during this time and couldn't tell anyone. The guy physically beat me, smashed up my mums car one night because I refused to do something, and self harmed in front of me when he didn't get his way immediately. Like, I dealt with a lot of ****. It brought me into a year long fight with self harm&depression and caused anxiety/panic attacks that I still have to this day. After years of intense therapy, I have finally recovered. I'm a much, much stronger person and I don't deal with anyone's ****. I have been discharged from therapy and I'm so much happier and have learnt to deal with it well. I still have a therapist that I go and see when I need to, but that's rare. Now, before you say he's used this to get to me and I'm 'vulnerable', he didn't know about this until we were way into our relationship. I refuse to have sex or do anything sexual - it's something I feel should be special, especially after the abuse I went through. He understands and is fully supporting of my decisions. As well as that, I've dealt with bullying all my life and to this day have never, ever had proper friends outside of arcades. All of this has made me grow up very quickly. If any of you knew me personally, you'd see and understand this.

The arcade scene - I've seen a lot of comments about arcades being for kids. Wrong. The arcades that I go to, and the ITG (dance game) community, are all over the age of 19. There are very, very few people under the age of 25. I could only name a couple of people under 25. I'm unusually young to the community, but I'm good at the game, so I'm accepted. When we're all together and having fun, we don't notice the age difference between us all, we just see the kind of person everyone else is and treasure that.

The dance games aren't the only thing my boyfriend and I have in common - we are into the same music, games, TV shows, books, etc. - we have way more in common than you guys think, and that is simply because you do not know us. You don't see us when we're together, you don't see how happy we are. We have long, long car journey's and talk the whole way there. We talk all day on Whatsapp and then see each other in the evenings and continue to talk - it doesn't get boring! We love each other's company and cherish it! That's a special thing to have with someone.

To everyone saying I'm naive, I'm really not. This relationship could either be the beginning of the rest of my life, or we could break up in a few months/years. Who knows? Certainly not the people posting here, not even I know. That's part of the fun! Being so so happy, not knowing where it'll take me - it could be that I stay this happy with him for the rest of my life or that we break up and it leads me on to another person that makes me happy for the rest of my life. I think you're more naive for believing that you're right about a relationship you know nothing about.

And pedophilia comments, really? It's kind of petty, even on this site. It isn't pedophilia, because I am legal (: yeah, it may have been a few months prior, but it isn't a few months prior, it is now. There's no need to say it's something that it's not.

I'll be honest with you all here, I've never been happier. I've never felt so loved and appreciated and important. I'm actually happy, which is something I've struggled to be for a long time. He always makes sure I'm okay, he makes sure I'm happy and fed and feel loved. I'm in love with him, and nothing that anyone here can say will change that. I have the funniest and most memorable moments with him - I've faced so many things that I feared and have overcome them with him. I've had so many first time experiences, even just little ones like new restaurants or first time staying in a hotel, etc.. No matter how many of you disagree, or think that it's wrong, you can't change the fact that I'm happy and I'm in love.

This is an AMA, not a thread demanding you all tell me you are correct and I'm wrong and naive and that my relationship will end horribly.

Please, ask me questions, I'm more than happy to answer them - and sure, tell me your opinion if you feel the need to as well, but please try to refrain from thinking that you are correct about everything when you have no idea what kind of people both myself and my boyfriend are.

Congrats, would you like a medal?

How did you meet?

Is that even legal and what do your family and friends think about this

How did you meet?

I'm sorry but that's wrong. You should be at least 18.

Why post this thread twice?

I'm sorry but that's wrong. You should be at least 18.

Your too young to be with him, when you break up it will damage you badly.

Do you both get lots of hate from others?

Dayuummmm a year ago he would be classified a paedophile and Catch a 10 yr sentence.

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I'm sorry but that's wrong. You should be at least 18.

It got deleted the first time.

It's gross either way imo....it's not like you suddenly mentally blossom when you turn 18

Nope. Still there.
http://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/showthread.php?p=58752805&highlight=

How does it feel thinking that when you were born he was 20 and he's more than double your age at the moment?