I completely understand your predicament - it's a well documented condition known as "Restrictus Faecet Momention".

The only cure is to empty your bowels in a specific way - you need to pay for a rolling contract in the nearest 5 star hotel in order to use their clean bathroom.
While this is expensive it is the only way you will be able to use the toilet - five star for number twos.

Most people suffering from the condition make back most/all of the money they paid to the hotel by selling the complimentary hotel toiletries on eBay.

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Reply 27

Cherie Amour

I love how people are still prescribing solutions, like OP actually has an issue here.

Reply 28

Treypound

Original post by justag

But it's not stored there. U grade in biology I see

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where did I say it was stored in the anus? you got a U in English Lit obviously.

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Reply 29

Sabertooth

Original post by Bambii2312

Take a dump whilst youre "having a shower" leave the water running, dump, then shower

Take one in the shower and stamp it down the drain.

Reply 30

perpetualpaths

If you're not mature enough to know that everyone empties their bowels, you shouldn't have moved in with your girlfriend. You should still be living with mummy and daddy.

Reply 31

sqwertylol

funny cus it can be a genuine problem. i used to stay at my gfs place at uni a lot. she had ensuite and the toilet door didnt really close. just sort of shut - but no locks or anything. semi see through door with gaps around edges. was like an ill fiitting window. impossible to relieve in peace.

Reply 32

Treypound

Original post by perpetualpaths

If you're not mature enough to know that everyone empties their bowels, you shouldn't have moved in with your girlfriend. You should still be living with mummy and daddy.

Do you really refer to your parents as mummy and daddy? and to think you are talking about levels of maturity.

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Reply 33

Hai_Ann

You're gonna get an anal disease if you continue like that.
Just poo. You're gonna block the toilet if you keep it stored longer.

Reply 34

phoenixsilver

Original post by Treypound

Do you really refer to your parents as mummy and daddy? and to think you are talking about levels of maturity.

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Please read my previous advice given.

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Reply 35

kkboyk

Original post by Cherie Amour

I love how people are still prescribing solutions, like OP actually has an issue here.

Cuz YOLO

Reply 36

Treypound

Original post by phoenixsilver

Please read my previous advice given.

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not what I asked so please answer my previous question. Pointless trying to take me on mate, you will surely lose.

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Reply 37

Kholmes1

Original post by Treypound

what a stupid comment, you could go 6 weeks if you wanted to, you simply just hold it in. Not everyone receives anal so my anus isn't as loose as yours.

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But cant you die or get seriously ill if you hold it in?

Reply 38

Veggiechic6

What an idiot! I can't believe I took this guy's other thread seriously. :rofl:

Reply 39

justag

Original post by Treypound

where did I say it was stored in the anus? you got a U in English Lit obviously.

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You said yourself it moved into your anus, by that point it's on its way out. So it must be stored there according to your false logic.

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