38 and 22?

The altar? I'm not thinking that far ahead..

Anyway, to more serious points. You must be prepared for the potential problems which comes along with such a large age gap. An example would be both of your personal priorities and expectations. Being young and all, your current life goals would likely differ from his - how can both of you reach a compromise on this? What do qualities do you see in a boyfriend, and him, a girlfriend?

You should also beware of the social stigma which usually comes along with such relationships.

Reply 21

username2217567

OP

2

Original post by Bupdeeboowah

Anyway, to more serious points. You must be prepared for the potential problems which comes along with such a large age gap. An example would be both of your personal priorities and expectations. Being young and all, your current life goals would likely differ from his - how can both of you reach a compromise on this? What do qualities do you see in a boyfriend, and him, a girlfriend?

You should also beware of the social stigma which usually comes along with such relationships.

The thing is, I wouldn't really want a relationship with someone that much older. But it would be nice to just have someone right now.

Reply 22

ikhan94

16

As im sure a lot of people have said, its quite and age gap but if both of you love each other, its up to you i guess

Reply 23

Bupdeeboowah

3

Original post by feloraa

The thing is, I wouldn't really want a relationship with someone that much older. But it would be nice to just have someone right now.

Well then, if your goal and attitude (and I'm not in any way criticising you) is to just have someone right now, then the relationship might not really work out as you would have to put in a lot of effort and make a lot of compromises for it to work.

Reply 24

username2217567

OP

2

Original post by Bupdeeboowah

Well then, if your goal and attitude (and I'm not in any way criticising you) is to just have someone right now, then the relationship might not really work out as you would have to put in a lot of effort and make a lot of compromises for it to work.

Really? I mean what if I just went over to his (over an hour on the train) and we just hung out every now and then?

Reply 25

Bupdeeboowah

3

Original post by feloraa

Really? I mean what if I just went over to his (over an hour on the train) and we just hung out every now and then?

For someone his age I think he is looking for something more than just a relationship/companionship, preferably something leading on to marriage, which I don't think is on your cards yet.

Though I could be very well wrong about this.

Reply 26

Rorschach II

20

Original post by Thickfreakness

He's too old. You both must be the same age. He's a very old man and you're a young child. Age gap is very important, you can't date anyone unless their same age as u. Your not going to loose anything by dumping him.

Ignore this post above; I understand this user probably means well, but it's riddled with falsities.

There's no such requirement for people to be the same age for their relationships to work, it's no staple requirement.
He's hardly a very old man, even when speaking relatively, neither are you a young child, even when speaking relatively. I'd say you're young, and he's (16 years) older with more life experience, not like that.

Age gap isn't very important, although it's a thing to consider.
You can date whomever the hell you want, and there's nothing which ensures it won't work.

Perhaps there's a higher tendency for relationships with age gaps not to work, but no causal relationship, and nothing major. (Anyone feel free to quote me if you got statistics saying otherwise, and no, I haven't researched this.)

Reply 27

Plumstone

16

Original post by feloraa

The thing is, I wouldn't really want a relationship with someone that much older. But it would be nice to just have someone right now.

My standard attitude to age gap questions is: provided that you both care about each other, that you treat each other well, and that it's legal, then it's all fine.

Your situation, however, is rather different from the normal questions. The key difference is that it sounds like you aren't really that interested in him; you just want some temporary fun.

If you explain your position and he says that he is happy with something casual and non-committal, then by all means go for it, but there is a chance that he is hoping to settle down soon, in which case he should be spending his time looking for a proper partner, rather than with you.

Reply 28

Tiger Rag

22

I briefly dated a 37 year old when I was 24. It didn't work and I honestly couldn't see it going anywhere. We had nothing in common. I was closer to his eldest child's age (he was 18, I think) than I was to his own age. I realised at some point, he actually had a girlfriend; (he was stupid enough to phone her in front of me) but never told him this was why (amongst other things) I didn't want a relationship with him. After telling him I didn't want a relationship, he wouldn't stop pestering me to meet up with me and couldn't understand why I didn't want to meet up.

I made the mistake of meeting up with him some months later. He was talking about marriage and moving in together. For obvious reasons, those things never happened and never will do.

I've not seen him for over a year now.

38 and 22?

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