How to break up?

Clearly you already made your mind up... it's not hard.... just tell her you don't want to be together anymore.

On another note, why u still using anon like u didn't give the game away a few posts ago :rofl:

Reply 44

Original post by Jenx301

Clearly you already made your mind up... it's not hard.... just tell her you don't want to be together anymore.

On another note, why u still using anon like u didn't give the game away a few posts ago :rofl:

Yeah Ik.... :l

What about getting her out of my head?

I was so convinced that she was the one...

Reply 45

username1623349

13

Original post by Anonymous

HOW MANY TIMES.

I dont mind much that shes done stuff!!!!!!!!!!!

The context bothers me immensely. It shows that she doesnt associate the same meaning and importance with certain things as I do.

Well when you break up with her, don't cite that as the reason why. Telling her that the way she's acted in the past is the reason could destroy her self confidence. Just tell her you aren't ready for a relationship right now, or you'd rather be friends, or whatever cliche you feel like

Reply 46

stargirl63

17

Original post by Anonymous

Enuf detayls

Tell me how to break up and get her out of my heart and head.

tbh OP, at the age you both are,you're probably gonna break up at some point anyway.

You break up with her by saying that you don't want to see her again because you don't feel that she's the person you are looking for . Then you move on by having no contact, and focusing on yourself for a while - errrrr..Did you really need to create a thread for this...don't you know all this?!

Reply 47

doodle_333

Original post by Anonymous

It isn't childish.

I have no problem with her having a sexual past, except jealousy which is justified. My problem is the nature of it.

Which is childish. If you had no problem with her as a person and she's not cheating on you or trying to get you involved in things you don't like then it is causing no issues at all. Having sex in public or having multiple sexual partners is not an indication of someone's moral fibre. Believing she is less of a person for having explored her sexuality (and not extensively by the sounds of it, she was still a virgin!) is a really childish view of the world.

Reply 48

Original post by doodle_333

Which is childish. If you had no problem with her as a person and she's not cheating on you or trying to get you involved in things you don't like then it is causing no issues at all. Having sex in public or having multiple sexual partners is not an indication of someone's moral fibre. Believing she is less of a person for having explored her sexuality (and not extensively by the sounds of it, she was still a virgin!) is a really childish view of the world.

How does one think like this...?

Of course having multiple partners reflects on yours morals!!!!!!! It shows that you don't consider it to be an intimate thing!!!! I completely do.

Reply 49

doodle_333

Original post by donutellme

How does one think like this...?

Of course having multiple partners reflects on yours morals!!!!!!! It shows that you don't consider it to be an intimate thing!!!! I completely do.

I've had one night stands. Doesn't mean for a second that sex with my long term partner isn't intimate, special, important or meaningful. It's a completely different thing. A one night stand or casual sex is a bit of fun, sex with a serious partner means a lot.

Reply 50

DeadEnd_96

11

[video="youtube;Rolfwv1djjI"]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rolfwv1djjI[/video]

Reply 51

Original post by doodle_333

I've had one night stands. Doesn't mean for a second that sex with my long term partner isn't intimate, special, important or meaningful. It's a completely different thing. A one night stand or casual sex is a bit of fun, sex with a serious partner means a lot.

Interesting.

I dont see it that way though.

Anyway. I've told her. And she sent a video saying how sorry she is and how much she regrets it and we skyped. Then I drew the line and said we're done. She's hurt. I'm hurt.

What's the next step?

Reply 52

doodle_333

Original post by donutellme

Interesting.

I dont see it that way though.

Anyway. I've told her. And she sent a video saying how sorry she is and how much she regrets it and we skyped. Then I drew the line and said we're done. She's hurt. I'm hurt.

What's the next step?

move on and don't be such a douche to the next girl you meet who inevitably will have a sexual past

Reply 53

Original post by doodle_333

move on and don't be such a douche to the next girl you meet who inevitably will have a sexual past

You clearly cant use your brain, thanks for the advice though

Reply 54

pineneedles

14

Original post by Anonymous

So me and this girl have been together for ~5 months. And it's been intense. (im 18, she's 16)

We hit it off really well, and fell for each other hard.

After telling each other we liked each other, but just before actually getting together, we started telling each other more about ourselves.

She told me she had a previous bf. No biggie.

Then I found out more and more, and about stuff she'd done. And quite frankly it disgusted me and put me off her. But I stuck through because I loved her and wanted it to work.

Turns out she really downplayed everything, and it was farrr worse than what she let on. It's completely a deal breaker for me, and I'm just.... eugh...

So now I'm adamant. I don't want her.

But I still ****ing love her...

How can I break up with her?

Should I tell her why (it'll hurt her feelings)? Or do I just get up and leave?

And how do I get her out of my head? I gave her everything. She was my first everything. She is my everything...

I thought about your situation for a while, and these are my thoughts:
She can't change what she's done, obviously, so the only thing that can change now is your feelings towards how she's behaved.

In my opinion, the fact that she has been honest with you (not immediately, granted, but that's understandable considering*) demonstrates that she has respect for you and trusts you. It also shows resignation to having more self respect and not acting that way again. Honestly, I've done things I'm ashamed of and at this point I can't imagine telling a future partner unless I thoroughly trusted him and respected him enough to be completely honest and open.
Another point I'd like to make is, acting the way she has doesn't mean she's a whore. She's probably young, silly, suggestible. She may have felt pressured or just felt as though it was just a bit of fun, and didn't take it seriously. Lots of girls (and boys) behave like that, it doesn't mean they're bad people.
You could try talking this through with her, explain how what she's told you has made you feel. Between yourselves, you might be able to come to some sort of conclusion where you both feel better about this.
*After all, people aren't always honest, particularly when they're at a stage in a relationship where it may not be worth complete honesty.

Reply 55

username47781

20

I hope she finds someone better than you.

Reply 56