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Guys, if a girl asked you out on a date...

Would you mind if she seemed a but nervous or shy when asking?

I'm going to ask my crush to join me a coffee or lunch date but I'm so scared of tripping on my words, or giggling or going red. I want to seem really confident when asking him but I'm scared I will seem more shy than confident!

Thank you :h:

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I'm a girl so I can't really say anything helpful but good luck!! I'm sure you'll be fine x
I think guys are more attracted to girls when they are slightly timid.

Whereas girls are probably more attracted to confidence.

So don't worry if you come off shy or nervous as he might find that sweet.
Reply 3
Avatar for moggis
moggis
18
Ah,bless.

I'm sure it won't matter.

But there is just one tiny thing. I used to be put off by very nervous girls who wanted to go out with me.

And the reason is that I was very fearful of hurting someone ( knowing how hard it was for me to be faithful etc).

So I did tend to put off shy girls.

But I suspect I was a bit weird.:smile:
(edited 8 years ago)
Original post by Anonymous
Would you mind if she seemed a but nervous or shy when asking?

I'm going to ask my crush to join me a coffee or lunch date but I'm so scared of tripping on my words, or giggling or going red. I want to seem really confident when asking him but I'm scared I will seem more shy than confident!

Thank you :h:

When i have asked out girls in the past i was slways stammering and my heart was pounding and my hands got clammy. I got rejected 6 times. I wish you luck OP

Probably try and tap as you say the words and speak slowly :smile:
Original post by Oh no not again!
I think guys are more attracted to girls when they are slightly timid.

Whereas girls are probably more attracted to confidence.

So don't worry if you come off shy or nervous as he might find that sweet.



Are they? This is news to me. How come?
Original post by Anonymous
Would you mind if she seemed a but nervous or shy when asking?

I'm going to ask my crush to join me a coffee or lunch date but I'm so scared of tripping on my words, or giggling or going red. I want to seem really confident when asking him but I'm scared I will seem more shy than confident!

Thank you :h:


As long as you get the words out and don't do something ridiculous no need to worry.
Not at all :yep:
Original post by Flying Lotus
Are they? This is news to me. How come?


I know it may seem silly, but it's an evolutionary trait.

The more vulnerable the female looks the more the guy finds her attractive.

I guess opposites attract. :/
Reply 9
Avatar for Reue
Reue
20
Original post by Anonymous
Would you mind if she seemed a but nervous or shy when asking?


Not at all. Infact I'd think it was pretty awesome she asked me in the first place. Shows confidence.
Reply 10
Avatar for Reue
Reue
20
Original post by Oh no not again!
I know it may seem silly, but it's an evolutionary trait.

The more vulnerable the female looks the more the guy finds her attractive.

I guess opposites attract. :/


Really? I like my woman fierce :wink:
Original post by Reue
Really? I like my woman fierce :wink:


Well it all depends on the individual tbh.

Some guys don't like aggressive women or some that have too much of a character it can be a bit too much, as you don't know who's wearing the trousers in the relationship, that's unless it's in the bedroom.

But majority of the time, I think guys like to be in control. As it's an evolutionary trait.
Original post by Oh no not again!
Well it all depends on the individual tbh.

Some guys don't like aggressive women or some that have too much of a character it can be a bit too much, as you don't know who's wearing the trousers in the relationship, that's unless it's in the bedroom.

But majority of the time, I think guys like to be in control. As it's an evolutionary trait.


Are you intimidated by strong women :wink:
Original post by Flying Lotus
Are you intimidated by strong women :wink:


Nah I just find modesty or shyness attractive.

I don't necessarily find those that like to be too possessive attractive, as it can give me a migraine at the end of the day.
In my head, I live in this perfect ungendered world and then I stumble upon threads like this that perceive weak women as attractive traits (even going as far as saying evolution moulds a personality??) and enforcing stereotypes.

Oh man, this used to be a big deal in like secondary school. I thought people just don't care who does what anymore and that it's all fair game.
Original post by addyaxis
In my head, I live in this perfect ungendered world and then I stumble upon threads like this that perceive weak women as attractive traits (even going as far as saying evolution moulds a personality??) and enforcing stereotypes.

Oh man, this used to be a big deal in like secondary school. I thought people just don't care who does what anymore and that it's all fair game.


'Ungendered world' ? What do you do when you need to use a public restroom btw?
Original post by Anonymous
Would you mind if she seemed a but nervous or shy when asking?

I'm going to ask my crush to join me a coffee or lunch date but I'm so scared of tripping on my words, or giggling or going red. I want to seem really confident when asking him but I'm scared I will seem more shy than confident!


awww

It's no problem, as long as he thinks you're aight anyways it won't matter if you're confident or shy really.
Original post by Flying Lotus
'Ungendered world' ? What do you do when you need to use a public restroom btw?


'In my head' I don't separate people depending on their gender and likewise I don't put such things into my thoughts such as 'Joe is aggressive, but that's because he's a guy..' or something else like that.

But I always snap out of it when I see people separate eachother over their gender with these internalised behaviour traits. Nobody ever questions why they say 'girl is x' and 'boy is x' because there is always a reason as to why they label certain things.

Always look deeper for the reason.
Original post by addyaxis
'In my head' I don't separate people depending on their gender and likewise I don't put such things into my thoughts such as 'Joe is aggressive, but that's because he's a guy..' or something else like that.

But I always snap out of it when I see people separate eachother over their gender with these internalised behaviour traits. Nobody ever questions why they say 'girl is x' and 'boy is x' because there is always a reason as to why they label certain things.

Always look deeper for the reason.


So the fact that men have higher levels of testosterone has nothing to do with anything?
Original post by Flying Lotus
So the fact that men have higher levels of testosterone has nothing to do with anything?


I used to always believe this, but no actually. On the basis that intersex children exist, it pretty much proves that it's all behavioural. Do look up what intersex means and come to your own conclusion.

Basically, children can be born with various genitals (vague or unclear or both), but sometimes someone can be born with a vagina or penis and look completely 'normal' only to find out that in their puberty stage (they haven't grown boobs or gotten a period etc) that they have had equal amounts of testosterone, for example, as a guy and also have XY chromosones so they actually have internal male sex organs. But due to parents seeing a vagina, they instantly believe they are a girl and raise them in that gendered way. This is different to a trans person, who has everything, typically, a female/male sex person would have but their brain tells different.

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