The Student Room Group

Do you/have you ever used Tinder?

Scroll to see replies

Original post by Foo.mp3
Apologies if my previous post was felt to be offensive, perhaps I should have phrased it in a less confrontational/more explicatory manner. I will not be gagged however, particularly not on matters pertaining to Islamism, and am duty bound to rephrase and reassert the fact, implicit in my earlier comment, that:

This is a British site and the "students" to whom you refer are typically British and/or studying in Britain, British society/educational institutions are governed by increasingly 'progressive' secular norms and laws (albeit largely Judeo-Christian in origin), and although we do tend to subscribe to the virtues of tolerance and diversity, us Brits won't tolerate anyone (except for transnational capitalists, unfortunately) trying to impose their particular ideologies on us, and especially not those seeking to curtail our personal liberties - including freedom of speech/expression e.g. flirting/getting to know prospective dates. In this context, I felt compelled to communicate to you that it is not for you, or any other Muslim, to censor users of this site/members of our society

This may seem like (and is, essentially) small chips but it only takes one person to get it into their head that it's ok to go around dictating to others in society how to go about their business to spawn a fascist movement. We have already seen similar sentiments spill out onto the streets with the 'Muslim Police'/homophobic print propaganda movements, etc. We won't tolerate such nonsense on TSR (however mildly it may manifest itself) any more than we will in other settings

Shukran, as-salamu alaykum


Oh, stop the self victimisation. Being asked to stay on topic is not "being gagged". Being stopped from posting on a website is not "curtailing our personal liberties". A lot of non-Muslims feel you shouldn't use this site for dating. There's no reason to bring her background into this.

If you are looking for exmaples of such movements, I'd suggest the British Union of Fascists, National Front, BNP, EDL, Britain First... Remember that respect, and oppression, go both ways.
never used it but wouldnt be opposed to it loads of my friends have it and they say that most people are just there to meet new people and to have a laugh don't see anything wrong with it
In my opinion Islam definitely has a lot to do with this thread so Foo's posts are pretty relevant and you should be ashamed of calling him out IMO
Original post by Anonymous
I stumbled across a guy who used to go to my primary school (he was/is two years older than me), it was so awkward because he had no idea who I was but I was like I KNOW YOU ALREADY :rofl:


Lmao awkward! See I dread this happening. If I was to find out a cousin was on there or something and then word got out of my aunties I would feel embarrassed. My mum's okay with the whole online dating thing though. Some of my friends think it's weird. I met my ex online and when people asked how we met I told them. I just dont want people to find my profile and scrutinize it.
Original post by Foo.mp3


I wasn’t asked to stay on topic. My post was deleted and I was given a card for ‘offensiveness’ (warned off) = attempting to gag me

Are you actually reading what you are writing? :lolwut:

Entitled to their opinion but if I saw such people behaving in the same way as xGCSE_Studentx then you can bet your ass I would challenge them too

Were there no reason we would not be having this conversation. Rather than ‘lowering your gaze’, I invite you to raise it, and open your eyes

Not quite sure what point you think you’re making but no-one is suggesting that fascism is the exclusive preserve of Islamists, or that Islamism is the only thing perverting ‘modern’ British society :dontknow:


I hadn't seen that. Still, you were needlessly rude to her, when she has only been polite. You might feel oppressed, but you look like the bully here, not her.

Yes. Civil liberties are granted by the state, not websites. I've been banned from website because I've had personal issues with people on them. While annoying, that isn't a restriction on my civil liberties. None of us have any legal "right" to use this website. The administraters can run it as they like, ban whoever they want.

It's fine to disagree with them, to challenge them. But what you wouldn't do is attack their religion.

I don't know if you think I'm a Muslim from that quote. I'm an atheist from a white Christian background. I don't even like Islam, or any other religion. But that shouldn't affect how you treat individuals. If you care so much about civil liberties, you should think about people as individuals, not a collective group. There's no collective blame or responsibility.

It's just interesting your examples were of a tiny group of Muslims, rather than the groups of thousands of non-Muslims.
This is very funny.
Reply 66
I'm asexual so no. I would never use tinder, grindr or any similar site/ app.

Posted from TSR Mobile
I use it once in a while to meet new people (the workload on my course is crazy so I don't have time for societies etc). I've only been on 2 dates from it though, one was with a guy I already knew (we realised we liked each other through Tinder) and that lasted around a year, and I met someone else recently through it and it's been going well, so I've had a pretty good experience with Tinder :colondollar:
I was for like a week, met my boyfriend on there :smile:

I hardly swiped right for anyone tbh. If they had selfies - swiped left. Topless photos - left. No bio - left. Some terrible line in bio - left. Only group photos - left. Less than 3 photos - left.
And no i never messaged anyone first, but as a girl, guys swipe right for like everyone and so i had tons of messages anyway no time to message people myself as well (im not boasting, most of the guys were dicks anyway ot's just true).
I liked it when the guys read my bio and asked a question in respect to it.


Posted from TSR Mobile
Nope.
Thought about it then i had to ask myself do i even want to go for the type of woman that would use tinder in the first place??
Nah, you need facebook to use it. I dont have facebook.

And i dont want a partner.
Can be awkward: I was swiping based just on first picture one night and got a match. Upon closer inspection it was my university halls building manager.

Can be, frankly, disgusting: I know people who have used it as an easy way to get sex, often whilst already in a relationship.

Can be fun: I've met friends through it and know other people who have as well.

Basically Tinder is whatever you make of it.

Just a shame so many of the people on there are conmen/women. They really need to find a better way of policing it than just requiring a facebook profile.
Reply 72
Original post by bravewoodmouse
I met my boyfriend on Tinder, we've been together over a year now. It can be a lot of fun and you can meet some nice people on there if you follow these simple rules...

How to meet normal people on Tinder

1. Left swipe if they have topless selfies done in the mirror, pictures of them with a tiger, or they have an aspirational quote as their description.
2. If you have matches, you'll need to actually message them as often people get scared at this point. Even just a 'how's your day going' is ok, to show you're friendly. You've got nothing to lose.
2. If messaging is going ok, arrange to meet sooner rather than later, as in within a few days. You'll know if it's a yes or a no very quickly.

This is from a female point of view, guys may have different rules :smile:


These are good rules.....it's just a shame that online dating turns most women into egomaniacal narcissists who seem to think no man is worthy enough to even walk on the same ground as they do, let alone date them.
Original post by MAINE.
These are good rules.....it's just a shame that online dating turns most women into egomaniacal narcissists who seem to think no man is worthy enough to even walk on the same ground as they do, let alone date them.

You sound bitter.
Yes I've used tinder in the past and met some cool people who I'm still friends with now :smile:
Reply 74
Original post by keturah
You sound bitter.
Yes I've used tinder in the past and met some cool people who I'm still friends with now :smile:


"Yo, I'm really happy for you and imma let you finish, but Beyonce has more friends on Tinder than you will ever have"

lol, thanks for the contribution :rolleyes:


Tbh your comment just speaks to your naivete....online dating is not about finding friends, especially Tinder - those guys did not start talking to you because they wanted to be your friend, they started talking to you because they wanted you to taste a slice of their penis pie.

Anyway I'm not going to comment on you because I obvs have no idea, but most women on online dating sites/apps receive in the tens of messages/matches a day, and it makes a lot of them overestimate their true value.
(edited 8 years ago)
Original post by MAINE.
"Yo, I'm really happy for you and imma let you finish, but Beyonce has more friends on Tinder than you will ever have"

lol, thanks for the contribution :rolleyes:


Tbh your comment just speaks to your naivete....online dating is not about finding friends, especially Tinder - those guys did not start talking to you because they wanted to be your friend, they started talking to you because they wanted you to taste a slice of their penis pie.

Anyway I'm not going to comment on you because I obvs have no idea, but most women on online dating sites/apps receive in the tens of messages/matches a day, and it makes a lot of them overestimate their true value.

The majority probably do just want sex but there's some that don't.
Ok I agree that some girls will be using it as an ego boost but so do guys. I asked one what made him join, he said to see how many hot girls he matched with and that it was an ego boost.
What can you expect when it's all based from photos.
Queen Saucy please, a gentleman never tells :plz2:
Original post by Foo.mp3


Relentless as I may be, on matters of great import to our society, I take care never to bully and have gone out of my way to explain to her that my comments are primarily intended to give folks cause for reflection before they consider acting similarly

1) No, they can't, there is a code of conduct; 2) Even if they could censor the site, the girl is not an admin

We are all free to critique everything, within the law and the rules of this website

Your conceptualisation of psycho-social phenomena is a little binary. In time you'll grow to understand that whilst one should of course judge an individual on their own merits, and try not to demonstrate undue prejudice, equally no man is an island, and women in particular are highly susceptible to social (and ethno-cultural) imprinting. Keeping this somewhat on topic, relatedly, one thing I noticed on Tinder was that there were virtually no (identifiably) Eastern girls on there

I was commenting on a narrow normative potentiality. Those are the key contemporary congruent examples of which I am aware, relating to my hometown. There are a myriad of other examples of problematic inter-cultural issues one could cite (more broadly), in relation to Islamism, but I don't see what that would achieve


People often feel they aren't bullying. Your tone is nasty, whereas hers is polite. That doesn't reflect well on you, whatever you intend.

You're taking those comments over literally. The website owners set their code of conduct.

Yes, but unless you are a dick you wouldn't needlessly attack someone's religion. I've attacked religion loads of times, but I wouldn't just bring it up when it isn't the topic.

Oh don't try and patronise me because I explained to you what a civil liberty is, it's so transparent. I knew you would get annoyed about that. "No man is an island" doesn't counter what you've done, which is make an unfair assumption about the reason for someone's argument. If she'd said "Discussing dating is haram, please don't do it", then discussing Islam and intolerances evident in Islamic communities would be relevant. I bet you wouldn't say "that's a typical black person argument". Acceptable targets.
Original post by Foo.mp3
I can assure you I do not feel in the least bit oppressed :smile:

Relentless as I may be, on matters of great import to our society, I take care never to bully and have gone out of my way to explain to her that my comments are primarily intended to give folks cause for reflection before they consider acting similarly

1) No, they can't, there is a code of conduct; 2) Even if they could censor the site, the girl is not an admin

We are all free to critique everything, within the law and the rules of this website

Your conceptualisation of psycho-social phenomena is a little binary. In time you'll grow to understand that whilst one should of course judge an individual on their own merits, and try not to demonstrate undue prejudice, equally no man is an island, and women in particular are highly susceptible to social (and ethno-cultural) imprinting. Keeping this somewhat on topic, relatedly, one thing I noticed on Tinder was that there were virtually no (identifiably) Eastern girls on there

I was commenting on a narrow normative potentiality. Those are the key contemporary congruent examples of which I am aware, relating to my hometown. There are a myriad of other examples of problematic inter-cultural issues one could cite (more broadly), in relation to Islamism, but I don't see what that would achieve


You'd rarely find Middle eastern girls on dating websites most likely let alone one on a place like tinder. Baba( daddy) wouldn't allow that if he found out also the values we have,I don't know many Arab girls that actually sleep with numerous and strange men,maybe some but not the majority,it more of a western thing,hence why I don't do hookups or that type of nonsense. We value our reputation based on cultural values and Norms. That being said,I act more European than Arab and some of the things I belief in go against my culture,tinder just isn't one of them.
(edited 8 years ago)
Original post by MAINE.
These are good rules.....it's just a shame that online dating turns most women into egomaniacal narcissists who seem to think no man is worthy enough to even walk on the same ground as they do, let alone date them.


It perhaps enhances narcissistic traits that are already there... could be a good filter; if someone comes across as not a complete idiot then you've got a keeper :wink:

Quick Reply