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He likes me but seems "emotionally stunted"?

This post may seem harsh first off, I apologise if it seems so and am not talking about people with MH problems etc.

However there is a boy very interested in me whom I'm not sure if I like or not. He is obviously very smart, chess champion, even more well read than I am (I like boys who read) and stuff like that. He is also good at badminton, played for the county etc. Friends have told me he said he likes me, he has shown obvious signs. He has some good points like always doing stuff for people, not just me.

It sounds mean however but he's quite eccentric, usually I like eccentric boys but he acts in such a "weird" way sometimes I'm not sure if I could love him despite the fact I respect him a lot because I would be short changed in a relationship. He seems to be emotionally unavailable and distant to everyone and moody sometimes, and sometimes doesn't show any empathy for people, even me (and he treats me pretty well). Or at least emotionally immature and snobby. We "click" intellectually more than the other boys I study with but he seems incapable of having the sort of relationship I want.

He added me on Facebook/Twitter etc. recently, god knows I am not one of those people who judges people for not conforming but a lot of his posts are just plain odd and he seems to have trouble relating with people. They're constant rants that aren't even about things that are that bad, like "****ing Apple, why haven't you released a blue laptop yet?", or being very defensive: "People need to stop seeking sympathy all the time... I'm so angry!! lol".

Kind of answered my own question here but can someone please confirm I'm not being too judgmental :lol:

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Reply 1
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Anonymous #1
OP
(Forgot to add: the seems to have trouble relating with people thing isn't just on social media, I also see it IRL sometimes)
tell him ur not interested. is a long ting, dont waste mans time. dem ones der
Reply 3
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Anonymous #1
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Original post by gr8wizard10
tell him ur not interested. is a long ting, dont waste mans time. dem ones der


goldman sachs has long documents too my man
Reply 4
Avatar for Zechs
Zechs
14
Not sure why anyone would ask TSR about whether or not they should continue seeing someone. Do you not know what you like?
Reply 5
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Anonymous #1
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Original post by Mancini
Not sure why anyone would ask TSR about whether or not they should continue seeing someone. Do you not know what you like?


I'm not seeing him, did you read the OP?
Original post by Anonymous
(Forgot to add: the seems to have trouble relating with people thing isn't just on social media, I also see it IRL sometimes)


I am basically the opposite. I am emotionally psychologically available. PM me if you like?
Reply 7
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Anonymous #1
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Original post by william walker
I am basically the opposite. I am emotionally psychologically available. PM me if you like?


sexy avatar :perv: u got instagram? xoxo
Reply 8
Avatar for Zechs
Zechs
14
Original post by Anonymous
I'm not seeing him, did you read the OP?


Well yes I know but your still asking as for advice on whether you should actually see him or not.
Hahaha wow, that descriptions rather close to home! The only difference is I'm not well read at all, and I never was a "champion", since I never played in tournaments. I kill my computer often enough, though :wink:.

If the relation between me and him runs deeper, then he probably will have a lot of affection to give to you.. but he might not have the "emotional availability" you actually want. At least I sure felt I was giving affection to my exes yet they complained I was "robot-like".
Original post by Mancini
Well yes I know but your still asking as for advice on whether you should actually see him or not.


It's like the "should I accept my offer from Oxford or LSE" threads. Maybe someone who's like (or dated) him will weigh in (can you?).
Original post by FireGarden
Hahaha wow, that descriptions rather close to home! The only difference is I'm not well read at all, and I never was a "champion", since I never played in tournaments. I kill my computer often enough, though :wink:.

If the relation between me and him runs deeper, then he probably will have a lot of affection to give to you.. but he might not have the "emotional availability" you actually want. At least I sure felt I was giving affection to my exes yet they complained I was "robot-like".


Do you have ginger hair and are you called Jamie? :lol:

Yeah. I mean, I can be pretty logical etc. too (rich parents.. weird upbringing :tongue:) and am definitely not conformist, but he doesn't just seem non conformist but actually rude or at least emotionally unavailable too. But he's an introvert and I'm an extrovert so maybe that's not helping.

How "available" would you be to someone you were in a relationship with? I want a lot of affection but he seems to express liking people by doing a ton of stuff for people (like tidying my room for me when I didn't ask him to). TBH I can do that myself :tongue:
He sounds just like me but more intelligent.
Original post by Tom Jickleson
He sounds just like me but more intelligent.


Yeah, that's something we bond over. We both read a lot, etc.
Original post by Anonymous
Yeah, that's something we bond over. We both read a lot, etc.


What are you saying blud?
Original post by Tom Jickleson
What are you saying blud?


man says what man says nomsayin?
Original post by Anonymous
Do you have ginger hair and are you called Jamie? :lol:

Yeah. I mean, I can be pretty logical etc. too (rich parents.. weird upbringing :tongue:) and am definitely not conformist, but he doesn't just seem non conformist but actually rude or at least emotionally unavailable too. But he's an introvert and I'm an extrovert so maybe that's not helping.

How "available" would you be to someone you were in a relationship with? I want a lot of affection but he seems to express liking people by doing a ton of stuff for people (like tidying my room for me when I didn't ask him to). TBH I can do that myself :tongue:


Accept that most guys are generally more emotionally closed off than girls. Of course, the more you get to know him, the more open he will be.
Original post by Tom Jickleson
Accept that most guys are generally more emotionally closed off than girls. Of course, the more you get to know him, the more open he will be.


I can accept that, people call me cold sometimes actually. But he's more unavailable on average than most of the guys I know. Just wondering if this would probably continue in a relationship
Reply 18
Avatar for Zechs
Zechs
14
Original post by Anonymous
It's like the "should I accept my offer from Oxford or LSE" threads. Maybe someone who's like (or dated) him will weigh in (can you?).


Well all I'll say to you is everyone's different and everyone's got a reason for why they are different. If he is just a bit unusual/weird in a somewhat pleasant way I think maybe give the guy a chance. However, if he is unusual/weird in a possibly aggressive, constantly put you down sort of way give him a pass.

Many people have a hard time communicating , sometimes emotionally stunted because of their upbringing but if they truly can't even treat you with respect I wouldn't bother.

I would never say I was emotionally stunted but I used to be shy and broke out of it, also don't have a problem communicating to ladies my feelings so not really in the same boat as him.
(edited 8 years ago)
Original post by Anonymous
I can accept that, people call me cold sometimes actually. But he's more unavailable on average than most of the guys I know. Just wondering if this would probably continue in a relationship


Nah I don't think it will. Is it possible he has assburgers or something?

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