The Student Room Group

Using Tinder to get over my crush.. Good idea or nah?

Basically, I've had an obsessive crush on a guy in my year for about a year and a half now. I'm sick of liking him and wanting to be with him all the time, so I turned to Tinder after seeing that poll about it on TSR a while ago.
My aim is to find a guy to distract myself with- I know that sounds cruel and heartless, but nobody really goes on Tinder to find a long-term relationship do they? Is that a really horrible thing to do? Is Tinder the best place to do this? If not, could you recommend any other places?
It's no use trying to convince me to not do it, most of you don't understand how **** it feels to be obsessively into a guy you know doesn't like you back.
Reply 1
:bump:
I know people who have met long term partners on Tinder. People will use it for a variety of reasons, so it does just depend on the individual. I think it would only be cruel if you dated someone without having any feelings for them. There's a chance you could meet someone on there that makes you feel more for them than this guy. However if you just pretend to like someone to distract yourself that's where I see it being cruel.

I currently have a crush that I just can't see working out but that doesn't stop him being on my mind a fair bit. However I'm on Tinder myself. If it's not going to happen with that person then why would it be a bad thing to look else where?

There are plenty of other sites to try to find people, though that depends on your age for most :P

There are also other ways to distract yourself - take up a new hobby, try to meet new friends etc.
Original post by Forumaddict
I have the biggest crush on a girl out of anyone here on this forum


smh.
Reply 4
Original post by Transtorm
I know people who have met long term partners on Tinder. People will use it for a variety of reasons, so it does just depend on the individual. I think it would only be cruel if you dated someone without having any feelings for them. There's a chance you could meet someone on there that makes you feel more for them than this guy. However if you just pretend to like someone to distract yourself that's where I see it being cruel.

I currently have a crush that I just can't see working out but that doesn't stop him being on my mind a fair bit. However I'm on Tinder myself. If it's not going to happen with that person then why would it be a bad thing to look else where?

There are plenty of other sites to try to find people, though that depends on your age for most :P

There are also other ways to distract yourself - take up a new hobby, try to meet new friends etc.



Firstly, thanks for the reply :biggrin:

Yeah, perhaps I was generalising a bit when I said nobody finds a long-term relationship on there. I do hope I find somebody I like more than him, but it's hard because every time I meet somebody, I can't help but to compare them to him and they never match up. Obviously I won't ever lie about having feelings for somebody if I don't, I'm not that cruel :lol:

Ah, another person in the same boat as me :biggrin: it royally sucks, doesn't it? How do you know he doesn't like you though, has he said that he definitely doesn't?

Ah, well, I'm 13. Could be a problem :lol: Nah, I joke- approaching my 18th birthday quite soon. I'm guessing most places are 18+?

I've tried it all, trust me :lol: I've read every single article there is online about how to get over an obsessive crush. It's all hopeless. Tinder is like a last, desperate resort XD
Original post by RainbowKiwi
smh.


Aware
Reply 6
I think it is always better to go for the next one like it will be your last. Accumulating a huge notch count of failed relationships doesn't just waste your time, it also leaves you drained, bitter and soulless.

You might not like how you feel about this guy. But you'll feel worse when or if the next one leaves you.
No it's not bad, go for it. As long as you don't string anyone along and have consent or w/e you're good to go, have fun :smile: Good luck getting over the guy as well
Original post by Anonymous
Firstly, thanks for the reply :biggrin:

Yeah, perhaps I was generalising a bit when I said nobody finds a long-term relationship on there. I do hope I find somebody I like more than him, but it's hard because every time I meet somebody, I can't help but to compare them to him and they never match up. Obviously I won't ever lie about having feelings for somebody if I don't, I'm not that cruel :lol:

Ah, another person in the same boat as me :biggrin: it royally sucks, doesn't it? How do you know he doesn't like you though, has he said that he definitely doesn't?

Ah, well, I'm 13. Could be a problem :lol: Nah, I joke- approaching my 18th birthday quite soon. I'm guessing most places are 18+?

I've tried it all, trust me :lol: I've read every single article there is online about how to get over an obsessive crush. It's all hopeless. Tinder is like a last, desperate resort XD


Well there's defiantly nothing wrong bout using Tinder or similar dating apps :P

It does :P I've not said anything but he's commented before saying that he's mostly straight so chances are he's not interested on that basis :P We also live a fair distance apart and are both busy so barely see each other as it is, and I'm not really interested in a long distance relationship :P

Yeah, but you'd probably get away with it with some sites. Okcupid is usually okay with our age range.

Ah yes. Wikihow? :P I've found with most crushes I've had they can feel pretty intense for a bit but then like a year or so later they can trail off. Though kinda makes me wonder if that'd happen in a relationship as well :/
Original post by Anonymous
Basically, I've had an obsessive crush on a guy in my year for about a year and a half now. I'm sick of liking him and wanting to be with him all the time, so I turned to Tinder after seeing that poll about it on TSR a while ago.
My aim is to find a guy to distract myself with- I know that sounds cruel and heartless, but nobody really goes on Tinder to find a long-term relationship do they? Is that a really horrible thing to do? Is Tinder the best place to do this? If not, could you recommend any other places?
It's no use trying to convince me to not do it, most of you don't understand how **** it feels to be obsessively into a guy you know doesn't like you back.


State the guy name on tsr and he might notice it

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