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What do guys do to get over a breakup?

So my ex broke up with me two months ago and he seems to perfectly ok. I've been upset and everything but he's been boasting about how much sex he's getting. He's bitched about me a few times too.


Because of this, I'm wondering if guys do get affected by the breakup?

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Some go out and get drunk with friends, have ONS if they can.

Others can only delete stuff, block contact and forget about them, and if you're still in contact with your ex... don't be.
Reply 2
Avatar for Zarek
Zarek
21
Breakups are very much worse for the dumpee than the dumper. Sorry.

Where dumped I have gone for drunkeness, male friendship and searching futilely for rebound relationships..
(edited 8 years ago)
Original post by BrokenLife
Men= not worth it. Live your single life happily.


Disgusting feminist propaganda lmao
But seriously OP you'll be fine, just focus on yourself for a good while
Other girls.
If it means anything to you, you don't.

No, seriously. You don't get over it. You never will. It's a myth. You'll remember it forever. The problem with youth is it predisposes you to orientate your entire life around the future. As if, at an indeterminate point, 'bad' will stop and 'good' will commence. 'One day, someday, you'll get a wife, you'll settle down, you'll buy a house, you'll get a dog and you'll have kids.' It's all imagined. You cannot imagine pain away, it exists. You cannot imagine your future, you can only live your present; and your present is running out.

You cannot use the future as a proxy for dealing with the present. The likely outcome is, with time, you begin to detach from your pain. With men - because men are, typically, more isolated than women (as society demands) and thus far more likely to kill themselves - this comes with the added risk of detaching from feelings.

When you can't deal with your pain - few people can - and if you can't envisage a way out of your pain, you stop placing yourself in situations which may result in (emotional) pain. So, how do men deal with pain? More often than not, in my observed and lived experience, they don't. Take from that what you will.
(edited 8 years ago)
Eat ice cream and cry at the notebook.
Reply 7
Avatar for Anonymous #1
Anonymous #1
OP
Original post by SeanFM
Some go out and get drunk with friends, have ONS if they can.

Others can only delete stuff, block contact and forget about them, and if you're still in contact with your ex... don't be.


Why a ONS?
Don't get in the relationship in the first place.
Reply 9
Avatar for Zarek
Zarek
21
[QUOTE=BrokenLife;61645693]Men= not worth it. Live your single life happily.
Can't live with 'em, can't live without 'em..
After my latest break up, I always tend to go on road trips and see friends.
Reply 11
Avatar for whorace
whorace
2
delete everything (number, photos, mutual friends)
make no attempt to contact them
do not think about them
get stuck into work
find a mess around girl

Solved
Try distancing yourself from him. If he makes you feel bad and is a negative presence in your life then get rid of him. its a new year tomorrow so have a good old clean out of your life. :smile:
Reply 13
Avatar for Andy98
Andy98
20
Just bottle, hide the feelings, carry on

Posted from TSR Mobile
Reply 14
Avatar for jazjaz
jazjaz
11
Original post by Anonymous
So my ex broke up with me two months ago and he seems to perfectly ok. I've been upset and everything but he's been boasting about how much sex he's getting. He's bitched about me a few times too.


Because of this, I'm wondering if guys do get affected by the breakup?


So he is upset then... He wouldn't feel the need to do all that if he were perfectly fine and secure.
Original post by jazjaz
So he is upset then... He wouldn't feel the need to do all that if he were perfectly fine and secure.


Is he doing that to distance himself?
Reply 16
Avatar for jazjaz
jazjaz
11
Original post by Anonymous
Is he doing that to distance himself?


The hooking up with other women and boasting = ego boost and validation
Bitching about you = sour grapes and resentment
Original post by Anonymous
Why a ONS?


I s'pose it could be sex with someone that's available.
Original post by Anonymous
So my ex broke up with me two months ago and he seems to perfectly ok. I've been upset and everything but he's been boasting about how much sex he's getting. He's bitched about me a few times too.

Because of this, I'm wondering if guys do get affected by the breakup?


It really depends on the guy.

For me, I was absolutely heartbroken. The woman I was with, was the woman I had intended to marry. I cried for a good month or two, and almost ended my life (not just because of her; family issues and depression were getting to me). I made mistakes trying to get her back, but ultimately I just had to cut off all contact and move on. No idea where she is, what she's up to etc. I can only assume she's still with the bloke she left me for. In hindsight; good riddance.

For others, they'll sleep around, get drunk, get emotional, depending on who dumped who they may pester their ex, show off, become cruel etc. Too many variables and it just depends on the individual. If your ex is already sleeping around, just cut off contact and move on; you wouldn't want to be with someone to selfish anyway.
I just tried to keep busy, it works some of the time but I thought I was going to spend my life with her. What was even harder is she just turned into a ghost, our mutual friends haven't heard from her in over 6 months. It's as if she left everything behind and just packed up and moved away.

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