I'm sure there is plenty information, and plenty of threads, on this already, but I need to vent and my situation may have some unique elements. When I came back to uni on Monday (first year Maths) I was already not feeling particularly motivated. A little interested in the prospect of new maths, but mainly focused on my only January exam, which was today. That exam went pretty horribly (okay, I am not a great judge of myself, and I could get a 2:1 which obviously isn't horrible, although that's if they don't lower/scale your marks, it was an easy exam; I was just stupid) and now I really don't feel any confidence or drive to go forwards. I had hoped that in the event of this I'd be able to say to myself that it was my first exam, and I can do better next time, but it was so easy in hindsight (well, even during, I recognized that my brain was just being stupid rather than the questions being objectively challenging) that I don't know how I'll cope in the future and any interest in any part of my course is immediately crushed by the thought "yeah but you'll do **** in it anyway".
Basically coming to the place where I'm supposed to be inspired to study my subject has essentially killed all the positive things about maths for me; I could do maths for fun and to relax before but now the association is just far too negative. If I'm doing maths not relevant to my course I feel guilty and inefficient, and doing anything for my course just brings up the aforementioned negative thoughts. I did really well in assignments before, but this exam is much more important and I feel like, despite the fact it is worth less than 2% of the degree overall, this will signal nothing but future failure. It doesn't help that when I feel crap like this I have no friends at uni and I never go out, and can only go on here and facebook my friends at home to get any kind of interaction with people. These things were tolerable when I was doing really well in the first term, but I really cannot stand both doing crap on the course and being a complete loner with it. If that's the case, I am failing at uni in every possible way, and it is doing nothing for me. I just don't know how I can motivate myself or make my situation better. In the past if I did badly it fired me up to some extent; I would at the very least feel anger over dejection, now I just feel numb and hopeless really.
tl;dr: I performed way below my expectations in my first uni exam, and feel like I will continue to fail in future; university is making me hate maths and I feel no motivation to study it, my situation is worsened by a lack of any real diversions/"fun" which is due to not knowing anybody here and never going out.