The Student Room Group

Gay dates; who pays?

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Original post by xobeauty
Usually in gay relationships there is one is more dominate and one who is more fem.
You have problems deep down inside yourself that you need to fix mister if you deny that.


I take it this is based on extensive intimate experience of male homosexual relationships and not on repeating some tired stereotype?
I would split. If one person pays it would be the richer one or the person who asked the other out or perhaps alternated.

Nothing to do with who's more masculine or feminine.
(edited 8 years ago)
Original post by *Stefan*
That is incorrect to say. It's just that you think gay people = fem guys. Not at all. In fact, most people I've met who're gay are actually straight-acting.


Yes, this is anecdotal but saying that it's plain that the vast majority will be camp is incorrect.


No I don't think gay = feminine guys. Not all act fem.
Original post by Quantex
I take it this is based on extensive intimate experience of male homosexual relationships and not on repeating some tired stereotype?


Nope Ive worked in the beauty industry I've met my fair share of gay guys, and I've met their boyfriends I've partied with them. I've been to gay clubs, I've had girls hit on me, I spoken to some...the ones who think they are guys like the ones who are more feminine and girly. I see how they interact with each other. Im Not pulling this out of my ass I've seen it with my own eyeballs.


And stereotypes don't come from nowhere. Just putting that out there.
Original post by UWS
As with any heterosexual date, just split it


The bill or the bum
Original post by xobeauty
Usually in gay relationships there is one is more dominate and one who is more fem.
You have problems deep down inside yourself that you need to fix mister if you deny that.
It just isn't ok to tell someone they have 'problems deep down inside' just because they disagree with you. Gay men have generally had enough of people telling us we're emotionally disturbed, ok? I'd guess you don't want my opinion on what straight women are like - respect the same please.

For the record, in my experience you're completely wrong. Could it be that working in 'the beauty industry' gives you a bias? Hmmm.
Original post by ThomasPassion
It just isn't ok to tell someone they have 'problems deep down inside' just because they disagree with you. Gay men have generally had enough of people telling us we're emotionally disturbed, ok? I'd guess you don't want my opinion on what straight women are like - respect the same please.

For the record, in my experience you're completely wrong. Could it be that working in 'the beauty industry' gives you a bias? Hmmm.


what about my opinion is wrong?

All I said was that there is usually a girly guy in a gay relationship. I forget the term the lgbt community uses. In a lesbian relationship there's a Dom and fem. idk there's so many different terms.

All these labels came from the lgbt community, so how am I wrong? Did these labels come out of the sky? Is it because I'm straight and straight people aren't allowed to have an opinion on such matters?

You can have your opinion on straight woman although this thread isn't about us- what's your point?
Original post by xobeauty
what about my opinion is wrong?

All I said was that there is usually a girly guy in a gay relationship. I forget the term the lgbt community uses. In a lesbian relationship there's a Dom and fem. idk there's so many different terms.

All these labels came from the lgbt community, so how am I wrong? Did these labels come out of the sky? Is it because I'm straight and straight people aren't allowed to have an opinion on such matters?

You can have your opinion on straight woman although this thread isn't about us- what's your point?

Altho I don't think you're factually right (three words: "masc for masc" lol), I don't particularly care what your opinion is. You are entitled to it. The issue is your attitude.
"You have problems deep down inside yourself that you need to fix mister if you deny that."
You get that this is weirdly aggressive, right?
Original post by ThomasPassion
Altho I don't think you're factually right (three words: "masc for masc" lol), I don't particularly care what your opinion is. You are entitled to it. The issue is your attitude.
"You have problems deep down inside yourself that you need to fix mister if you deny that."
You get that this is weirdly aggressive, right?


What am I not factually right about?
First date: depends on who invited who. The inviter should pay for the invitee.
Original post by xobeauty
What am I not factually right about?
That most gay relationships have a 'fem' and a 'dom' as you put it. I personally don't think that's true. And I don't think you could know what 'most' gay relationships are like just because you've got a couple of camp friends and you've been to a gay bar.

Whether you're right or wrong, though, has nothing to do with your random lashing out, which you don't seem to want to talk about. For some reason.

Anyway, I'm not gonna feed the troll. Apologize or don't. Bye.
Original post by Das Ich Man
The masculine one.


Sind Sie ein Deutsche oder eine deutschsprachige Person? (Ich bin gelangweilt, und ich will auf Deutsch sich unterhalten.)
Original post by ThomasPassion
That most gay relationships have a 'fem' and a 'dom' as you put it. I personally don't think that's true. And I don't think you could know what 'most' gay relationships are like just because you've got a couple of camp friends and you've been to a gay bar.

Whether you're right or wrong, though, has nothing to do with your random lashing out, which you don't seem to want to talk about. For some reason.

Anyway, I'm not gonna feed the troll. Apologize or don't. Bye.


That was not a lash out. But I do apologize to him.
If you're lucky enough to be submissive and he happens to be masculine then he pays haha !
The giver.
Original post by ThomasPassion
That most gay relationships have a 'fem' and a 'dom' as you put it. I personally don't think that's true. And I don't think you could know what 'most' gay relationships are like just because you've got a couple of camp friends and you've been to a gay bar.

Whether you're right or wrong, though, has nothing to do with your random lashing out, which you don't seem to want to talk about. For some reason.

Anyway, I'm not gonna feed the troll. Apologize or don't. Bye.


I can confirm that in most of the gay guys iv talked to there has been a dom and a sub in the relationship/giver and a taker. I work in a gaybar....
Depends. When it comes to playtime, are you the giver or the taker?
Original post by xobeauty
what about my opinion is wrong?

All I said was that there is usually a girly guy in a gay relationship. I forget the term the lgbt community uses. In a lesbian relationship there's a Dom and fem. idk there's so many different terms.

All these labels came from the lgbt community, so how am I wrong? Did these labels come out of the sky? Is it because I'm straight and straight people aren't allowed to have an opinion on such matters?

You can have your opinion on straight woman although this thread isn't about us- what's your point?


Dom/domme is a BDSM term (the opposite being sub and someone who is willing to do either role is a switch). The terms you may be looking for a masc and camp (men) and butch and femme (women). But not all same-gender attracted peeps fit into a small box and not all same-gender relationships have a 'masculine' and a 'feminine' partner. If you're looking for terms for sex you're want top ('giver'), bottom ('taker') and versatile (someone who is happy to top or bottom). Masc doesn't always mean top and camp doesn't always mean bottom. And many gay men don't like anal.
Original post by SmallTownGirl
Dom/domme is a BDSM term (the opposite being sub and someone who is willing to do either role is a switch). The terms you may be looking for a masc and camp (men) and butch and femme (women). But not all same-gender attracted peeps fit into a small box and not all same-gender relationships have a 'masculine' and a 'feminine' partner. If you're looking for terms for sex you're want top ('giver':wink:, bottom ('taker':wink: and versatile (someone who is happy to top or bottom). Masc doesn't always mean top and camp doesn't always mean bottom. And many gay men don't like anal.


So why when I say it people act new?
Either split it - or as a gay guy my self im more submissive and like dominant guys - it is massive brownie points if they offer to pay :smile: as its very masc thing to do.

I’ll still say to split it though I’m not a mk ru grabber

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