How bad is having sex before marriage to God?

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It seems as though you've only be in one relationship..
#expert

Everyone here can see that you're naive and have no idea what a relationships' about. Sex is a huge part of it and one where you're not sexually compatible is doomed to fail. Why the heck would someone get married to someone they don't enjoy sex with? To have a brother-sister relationship?

Reply 61

Serine Soul

Original post by Das Ich Man

Well you know people these days, some get married at 16 :gasp:

(is this a thing), and your description of it being 'unclimatic' was most apt :biggrin:

My mum did at 17 :gasp:

I'd rather shoot myself than get married between 16-25 :lol:

Reply 62

Serine Soul

Original post by Anonymous

Bitch, I'm not being naive.
You have delusions of grandeur.

Of what grandeur?
You're the one with the delusions of some soppy romantic relationship

Reply 63

TheonlyMrsHolmes

Original post by enaayrah

My mum did at 17 :gasp:

I'd rather shoot myself than get married between 16-25 :lol:

My mum did too :redface:

and yes, so would I! :redface:

Reply 64

Anonymous #2

Original post by Anonymous

Talking about yourself again? And funny you say 6 when Muhammad married Aisha when she was 6

#awks!

How is that of relevance to me..?
#awks

Reply 65

The Genghis Khan

Original post by Anonymous

To out your answer simply: it is very bad.

You're 18, still fairly young. How long have you been with your partner for? Does he want to have sex too?

The first thing i'm going to say is that you shouldn't have a boyfriend/girlfriend at all. Whether you're on an online relationship or a real relationship, whether you don't kiss or touch, or whether you do. Allah (SWT) sees them all equal in his eyes and forbids you to stay away from the opposite sex in any sexual matter until the time of marriage is near. If you have a partner, it leads to things. So to stop that chain reaction happening, the best thing to do is to cut off all ties with them until you are both ready for marriage. Allah (SWT) knows best and if they are the one for you, Allah will make it happen. Do some research into it and ask yourself most importantly WHY would God forbid this. Once you see logic and reason, you will understand and only then will you be 100% willing. I am not in any form a committed, but I know marriage is the best type of relationship in terms of family structure and who will it will impact.

Please do some research and think about this.

what would allah pbuh do

Reply 66

Anonymous #6

I have many reasons for why I am waiting until to marriage, both religious and non religious. I couldn't give two flying birds what others think whether they are an atheist, agnostic, Muslim, Buddhist or even Christian. My reasons are certainty valid to me. If others think this is an outdated decision or whatever, I really couldn't care less, to be frank I never have and never will. I'm all about doing things because it's right for you and not just because it's what everyone my age is doing or believing. It's a personal choice I have made and I am so happy with it. I've learnt so much about my current boyfriend and it feels great knowing we can have a strong relationship without having sex. We actually talk about sex as we are aware that some day we plan on having sex though not now; we even research about sexual matters together and speak about our experiences. Instead we are more focused on strengthening more important factors to a relationship such as communicational skills and being honest with one another.

God forbid but if we got married and for some reasons we couldn't have sex as frequently or even when we reach old age and stopped having sex- we would be confident that we would still remain strong. And not to sound cocky and arrogant but most people my age (18 years) don't have what we have because we do things differently and understand why. Most of my friends wish they did but they can't be bothered to wait and focus on a person's essence. I find peace with hugging and kissing, embracing his presence because he is such an awesome guy. I love him and I haven't even slept with him yet. It feels great saying that. People forget that no one was ever born a sex God or sex freak, it's all by experience. It's why we say to each other if we get married, we will learn together and become each other's sex freaks :wink:

We're both opened minded people so it would be a playground for us haha I'm proud to call him my baby, lover and even hubby <3

Interesting reads.

Depends how bad the sex is.

Reply 69

Serine Soul

Original post by TheonlyMrsHolmes

My mum did too :redface:

and yes, so would I! :redface:

You should've seen my mum's face when I told her tha :redface:

Reply 70

Retired_Messiah

I'm sure (s)he/it? has bigger things to worry about than you having consensual intercourse with an individual who you love and who loves you.

Reply 71

Anonymous #5

Original post by Anonymous

How is that of relevance to me..?
#awks

You made that comment and were defending his naive view of relationships so it's certainly relevant to you lol.

#awks

Reply 72

Anonymous #7

Brother please, sex before marriage is haram, but SEX SLAVERY with war captives is halal. Today there allot of refugees and yazdi captives in need of help from a brother of the deen, ya know what I mean. Subanhallah

Reply 73

Cherry82

I'm not trying to sound angry and judgemental however if you consider yourself a Muslim however you're in favour with sex before marriage though your religion evidently preaches against it...erm correct me if I am wrong but aren't you being extremely hypocritical? Things aren't adding up. Just saying this out there because I'm tired of the double, two side/faced attitude some religious people portray and I'm a Christian. I'm not perfect but I definitely try to follow what I believe is right in consideration with the bible and my religion. You can't just pick and choose. You're either in or out, hot or cold, luke-warms are problematic. It's ok to be unsure but be honest about it- don't put a front because it's deceiving. I'm waiting for someone who thinks they 'know' the bible to tell and ask me well do I eat shellfish or mix fabric materials? -_- please do your research on the matter and understand certain fundamentals in Christianity before asking such patronising, silly questions. Not to sound rude but I'm so sick and tired of hearing these ones, it's so ancient!

Reply 74

samina_ay

Do it and then repent. Or don't do it at all and get married? It could go two ways. You decide.

Reply 75

Anonymous #5

Original post by Anonymous

Begone troll.

Reply 76

Anonymous #6

Original post by Retired_Messiah

I'm sure (s)he/it? has bigger things to worry about than you having consensual intercourse with an individual who you love and who loves you.

I don't know about Allah but Yahweh cares about everything concerning his creation. He loves his creation therefore every aspect of a person is extremely important to him. He even knows the exact number of hairs on your head because he cares, these 'small' things matter so much to him and that's why we call him God because of his awesomeness.

In a perfect world, what you described would always have a good, sound ending without any effects and consequences but we all know that hardly ever happens in reality. With sex comes a lot of new worries and possible responsibilities. It isn't just about 'love' any more. You have to consider so much more. I didn't really care about this until I experienced some sort of sexual contact. If the possibility or never having unwanted pregnancy, receiving STIs and having your heart broken was certain, I would be a different person and agree. Unless you're living for the moment only then yes, go ahead but just know that with every decision comes consequences whether good or bad. It hit me the other day how one decision can change your life forever. And this isn't to scare any one and I'm not even just talking about having sex but in general. It's just I haven't recovered or been the same ever since knowing of my friend's pregnancy. It makes me so depressed because she's only 17, it was her first time and they used protection which scared the crap out of me- I know she wished to finish her education then after settle down and have a child which is why is makes me so upset. She doesn't want this.
I know not everyone female will get pregnant like she did but from what I know, my God only wishes the best for his creation. It may sound crazy waiting until marriage but I definitely see why he may say so, not just because of pregnancy or anything but for many other reasons.

Reply 77

Anonymous #1

Original post by Anonymous

Don't tell me your planning to have sex?
From a purely Islamic perspective, any pre-marital relationships are 'zina' i.e. unlawful. Sexual intercourse beween an unmarried couple is not permissible on any grounds.
If you have a strong urge to have sex, which I presume you have, then it is best to get married soon.
And if you are legally bound to a contract i.e married, then you are making a long-term committment by definition.

I know it's unlawful, but I want to know why. What makes marriage different from a strong relationship? Saying it's unlawful isn't an explanation, it's just a rule, and if there is no reasoning behind it then why should I follow it, that's all I'm asking..

Reply 78

abruiseonthesky

If God exists and truly is all-loving and forgiving, some sex before marriage shouldn't be an issue imo. It's not a crime in this country :smile:

Imo religious texts should be viewed in the context of the societies in the times that they were writen. At the time the Bible/Qu'ran etc. were written society was a lot different to the west now in that homosexuality wasn't acceptable, sex outside of marriage wasn't acceptable, women were commodities... society's changed.

(edited 8 years ago)

Reply 79

Anonymous #1

Original post by Anonymous

I'm sorry but this doesn't make any sense to me. I believe that before marriage, you should have time to get to know one another, otherwise if you get married to someone you barely know, it won't end very well