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Do you think...

Poll

Which of the following is true in your opinion/ experience

people who grew up victims/ witnesses of abuse will grow up to be kinder, better people

OR

people who grew up victims/ witnesses of abuse will grow up to be abusers themselves

OR

there is no difference in the behaviour of someone who has been a victim of/ witnessed abuse and someone who hasn't

and why?
(edited 8 years ago)
I'm not really sure I just really wanted to reply to any thread you started.

I think it can really vary though. A lot of abusers do seem to have been abused in their past but not every victim goes on to be an abuser- if that makes sense?
Original post by z33
people who grew up victims/ witnesses of abuse will grow up to be kinder, better people

OR

people who grew up victims/ witnesses of abuse will grow up to be abusers themselves

OR

there is no difference in the behaviour of someone who has been a victim of/ witnessed abuse and someone who hasn't

and why?


Pretty sure that statistics show abused children are far more likely to be abusers themselves. Just thought I'd add that in
Reply 3
Avatar for K.C
K.C
11
Original post by cbreef
Pretty sure that statistics show abused children are far more likely to be abusers themselves. Just thought I'd add that in


:frown:
Original post by K.C
:frown:


Ikr
Reply 5
Avatar for z33
z33
OP
21
Original post by EtherealNymph22
I'm not really sure I just really wanted to reply to any thread you started.

I think it can really vary though. A lot of abusers do seem to have been abused in their past but not every victim goes on to be an abuser- if that makes sense?


Ahah awhhh :3

yeah that does :smile:

Original post by cbreef
Pretty sure that statistics show abused children are far more likely to be abusers themselves. Just thought I'd add that in


hmm i found this

Spoiler

Reply 6
Avatar for ZuluK
ZuluK
17
It affects each person differently. And you can never guarantee how the person will react to the abuse. Even tho statistics show it is more likely for abusees to become abusers, it's not really something you can number.
There are too many factors to consider for. Being a victim of abuse does not guarantee you'll be any one of those things in the future but a victim of abuse certainly can be one of those things.
It depends how someone will take it. I guess I count towards both a victim and a witness of domestic abuse (I saw my father hit my mother multiple times, strangle her etc, he also threw random items at me such as chairs, bricks etc.) and would never do the same to anyone else, no matter how much I'd hate them, I just couldn't. But I've seen some stories where people who have been abused or witnessed it became abusers themselves, it's like the abuse disturbed an animal sleeping inside them..
Original post by Indeterminate
All of those things are possible. I am of the opinion that different people will respond in different ways :yep:


This sums it up perfectly. Well done.
Original post by z33
people who grew up victims/ witnesses of abuse will grow up to be kinder, better people

OR

people who grew up victims/ witnesses of abuse will grow up to be abusers themselves

OR

there is no difference in the behaviour of someone who has been a victim of/ witnessed abuse and someone who hasn't

and why?


Statistically the second is much more likely, but it can go either way.
Original post by z33
people who grew up victims/ witnesses of abuse will grow up to be kinder, better people

OR

people who grew up victims/ witnesses of abuse will grow up to be abusers themselves

OR

there is no difference in the behaviour of someone who has been a victim of/ witnessed abuse and someone who hasn't

and why?


When I think about this, I always think about one of my brothers and I. We both grew up in the same not-so nice household - I grew up promising myself I'd do everything I could to make sure no one ever went through what I did, but my brother went the opposite, to the extent now - both of us having moved out - I see him at most every six months because I don't like the person he's become.

People react to things in different ways, even when - as in my experience - they come from exactly the same environment. So, I'd go with what others have said and say it's a mix of all.
Reply 12
Avatar for z33
z33
OP
21
Original post by acupofgreentea
When I think about this, I always think about one of my brothers and I. We both grew up in the same not-so nice household - I grew up promising myself I'd do everything I could to make sure no one ever went through what I did, but my brother went the opposite, to the extent now - both of us having moved out - I see him at most every six months because I don't like the person he's become.

People react to things in different ways, even when - as in my experience - they come from exactly the same environment. So, I'd go with what others have said and say it's a mix of all.


fair nuff
what do you think it was about your brother that made him take a different path to you? :3
Original post by Foo.mp3
You'll find A and B are not mutually exclusive, and that C is exceptionally rare. We are emotional/socially affected beings, highly susceptible to (neuroplastic) changes induced by psychological environments, experiences, and behaviour (especially trauma)


Very good point.
hmmm I have heard stories of abused victims becoming the abusers later in life, but I guess each case is different
Some people'll fall into the first catagory, others the second. :redface:
Reply 16
Avatar for z33
z33
OP
21
Original post by ✠ ☢ ✠
hmmm I have heard stories of abused victims becoming the abusers later in life, but I guess each case is different


yeah this is what made me ask this question
i watched some YouTube video about murderers and serial killers and most of them had a back story of either witnessing or experiencing abuse at a young age
Original post by z33
fair nuff
what do you think it was about your brother that made him take a different path to you? :3


To be honest, I've wondered that myself a lot and still don't have an answer.

I suppose just as we're different people, we reacted to the situation differently.

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