Time to Talk Day 2016 (Thurs 4th Feb): let's talk about mental wellbeing!
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Original post by dipka
Could you not use the fact that a MH condition is hidden to your advantage.
For example, if you are a wheelchair user you can't meet anyone without it being immediately obvious you have a disability, and then you facing all the judgement, stereotypes or anything else someone wants to give you before you've even said or done anything.
However, a MH problem is 'hidden' so, I would think that could be a advantage-how will people when you first meet them know you have it? They won't. Yes they may start to work it out if you get to know them, and you will get to know things about them. But I would have thought that introducing yourself like "hello I am ____ and I have ____ mental health problem" is probably a bad way to do it!
So, my thoughts on it are to stop worrying-it's probably not as obvious to other people as it feels to you, and you don't have a massive sign on your head saying whatever your problem is, it just feels like it to you because your the one affected by it and thinking about it so much.
Hope this helps.
For example, if you are a wheelchair user you can't meet anyone without it being immediately obvious you have a disability, and then you facing all the judgement, stereotypes or anything else someone wants to give you before you've even said or done anything.
However, a MH problem is 'hidden' so, I would think that could be a advantage-how will people when you first meet them know you have it? They won't. Yes they may start to work it out if you get to know them, and you will get to know things about them. But I would have thought that introducing yourself like "hello I am ____ and I have ____ mental health problem" is probably a bad way to do it!
So, my thoughts on it are to stop worrying-it's probably not as obvious to other people as it feels to you, and you don't have a massive sign on your head saying whatever your problem is, it just feels like it to you because your the one affected by it and thinking about it so much.
Hope this helps.
As Sabertooth has said, not all mh issues can be 'hidden'. For example my boyfriend has always known that there was something not right with me (before I gave him the official names of what I have) because I act and talk differently and get incredible sadness.
The stigma within the mental health services too is of particular concern to me since I have been on the receiving end of it once or twice. It's saddening that if you don't display classical symptoms of mental health issues it creates problems and (in my case) feeling like it's not worth going through the hassle of being treated.
With things like depression, it's actually impossible to hide. ( evenbefore we go into self harm) I have met a few people with Bi Polar where it's not been obvious at all. And did used to have a friend with Schizophrenia where I only knew because he told me.
Can someone please point me in the direction of Mindfullness please? It's been mentioned a few times. Although, I think GP only mentioned it because she thinks I'm depressed (I'm not) instead of sorting out what's really going on.
Can someone please point me in the direction of Mindfullness please? It's been mentioned a few times. Although, I think GP only mentioned it because she thinks I'm depressed (I'm not) instead of sorting out what's really going on.
Original post by Tiger Rag
With things like depression, it's actually impossible to hide. ( evenbefore we go into self harm) I have met a few people with Bi Polar where it's not been obvious at all. And did used to have a friend with Schizophrenia where I only knew because he told me.
Can someone please point me in the direction of Mindfullness please? It's been mentioned a few times. Although, I think GP only mentioned it because she thinks I'm depressed (I'm not) instead of sorting out what's really going on.
Can someone please point me in the direction of Mindfullness please? It's been mentioned a few times. Although, I think GP only mentioned it because she thinks I'm depressed (I'm not) instead of sorting out what's really going on.
I don't know many mindfulness resources, but this one is quite helpful I think.
I am in general quite cynical about 'structured' mindfulness, but the principle does make a lot of sense. When I was in the Priory they used to often end groups with structured mindfulness (both feet flat on the ground, eyes closed, noticing your breathing, bringing your thoughts back to the present if you noticed yourself drifting off etc) and we used to roll our eyes at it, but there are all sorts of activities which can be very mindful.
Colouring's very popular for mindfulness at the moment. It may sound silly but I find sitting on swings at the park very mindful - it comes more easily than 'trying' to be mindful, but it can be really mindful to be outside on the swings or just going for a walk, noticing the breeze on your face as you swing, noticing the sunshine on your skin, the sounds of the birds or the wind, noticing your breathing after going for a run, watching the waves in the ocean, things like that.
The idea of mindfulness is basically to be in the present moment, rather than consumed by worries/thoughts about the past or future like so many of us are. It's based on noticing those thoughts and worries, acknowledging that they are there and not trying to make them stop, not trying to force yourself to not think about them, but to accept them and 'let them be' there, passing by without acting on them.
One analogy that they used in the Priory which was very helpful was the 'bus driver' analogy. In this analogy, you're the driver of a bus full of very noisy, rowdy passengers. No matter what you do those passengers will be there and noisy. You can try to make them sit down and be quiet, but you have to stop the bus to do that so you won't be continuing on your journey, you'll be distracted from the task at hand and it increases your frustration. Or you can keep driving the bus, accepting that the passengers are there and being noisy and rowdy, but that that does not need to affect you or change your behaviour. You acknowledge that and can continue to focus on the task at hand.
This is a ridiculously long post, but I hope it helps anyone who is unsure what mindfulness involves or if it's worth trying.
Original post by Tiger Rag
Can someone please point me in the direction of Mindfullness please? It's been mentioned a few times. Although, I think GP only mentioned it because she thinks I'm depressed (I'm not) instead of sorting out what's really going on.
Can someone please point me in the direction of Mindfullness please? It's been mentioned a few times. Although, I think GP only mentioned it because she thinks I'm depressed (I'm not) instead of sorting out what's really going on.
Hey
I think my laptop is working on TSR again so hopefully I can do a post about mindfulness though tbh the post above covers it all
Original post by Little Popcorns
No worries hun I'm feeling spectacularly rubbish on this day of mental health myself so it's all quite fitting 
Hope you're feeling better? If not don't worry you'll fit right into this day! Tehe.
Have a cbt session today really will get to do some genuine mental health talk. Okay I'm being silly now sorry
joking aside I really do have cbt 
Hope you're feeling better? If not don't worry you'll fit right into this day! Tehe.
Have a cbt session today really will get to do some genuine mental health talk. Okay I'm being silly now sorry
joking aside I really do have cbt Ah sorry you're not feeling well either!
I think *touches wood* that my laptop might be working normally again with TSR, so hopefully I can really get this thread going and answer everyone's points now Hope CBT goes well
Another mental health topic that I feel deserves prevalence within this thread, is the task of reconciling mental health with careers/applying for work. For instance, I'm unemployed at the moment and have been ever since I started having serious mental health difficulties, and I've only recently properly got into the right state of mind to actively search and apply for jobs, except I can't help but think that I might have to purposely omit or lie about my mental health condition from a job application, or when it comes to the interview stage, in order to reduce the likelihood of rejection.
Original post by lustawny
Another mental health topic that I feel deserves prevalence within this thread, is the task of reconciling mental health with careers/applying for work. For instance, I'm unemployed at the moment and have been ever since I started having serious mental health difficulties, and I've only recently properly got into the right state of mind to actively search and apply for jobs, except I can't help but think that I might have to purposely omit or lie about my mental health condition from a job application, or when it comes to the interview stage, in order to reduce the likelihood of rejection.
A very good idea for a topic of conversation! Will add that to the list and then get cracking on working through the list
OK, so a reminder of the current list of topics (which is by no means exhaustive):
- The Five Ways to Wellbeing (New Economics Foundation)
- Mindfulness
- Bullying and its impact upon mental health (both short-term and long-term). Cyber-bullying
- self-esteem and self-confidence
- stereotyping/pigeon-holing, and mental health and romantic relationships
- eating disorders and (the state of the) mental health services
- mental health and careers/the workplace/applying for jobs/disclosure
Let's get some real indepth conversations going peeps!
- The Five Ways to Wellbeing (New Economics Foundation)
- Mindfulness
- Bullying and its impact upon mental health (both short-term and long-term). Cyber-bullying
- self-esteem and self-confidence
- stereotyping/pigeon-holing, and mental health and romantic relationships
- eating disorders and (the state of the) mental health services
- mental health and careers/the workplace/applying for jobs/disclosure
Let's get some real indepth conversations going peeps!
Original post by lustawny
Another mental health topic that I feel deserves prevalence within this thread, is the task of reconciling mental health with careers/applying for work. For instance, I'm unemployed at the moment and have been ever since I started having serious mental health difficulties, and I've only recently properly got into the right state of mind to actively search and apply for jobs, except I can't help but think that I might have to purposely omit or lie about my mental health condition from a job application, or when it comes to the interview stage, in order to reduce the likelihood of rejection.
I can relate very much to this, but honestly would say please do consider being open about it. Not just because there can be issues further along the line if you then need time off, flexibility, etc and they argue that you haven't declared something, but also because they can be really good about it.
Although I realise it isn't that easy (I have had the same concerns), there are real advantages to being open. A lot of employers now work under the 'Two ticks' disability scheme, which means you are guaranteed an interview if you fit the basic application criteria and have declared a disability. It also means they can offer reasonable adjustments for you if necessary. I've just been offered a role in the Civil Service, and declaring mental health problems meant they offered an 'orientation session' prior to the interview to get to know the building and get used to it, extra time if necessary in the tests, there are all sorts of things they can suggest to help out.
But again, I can very much relate. Unfortunately there is still that concern about stigma and there is still that reality that in some cases it can lead wrongly to rejection, and it's so hard to get away from that when you're applying for jobs.
With regards to eating disorders and mental health services... YES, YES, YES. This is such a problem.
Specialist services are so notoriously difficult to get referred to. And the reality of eating disorders is that without early intervention, full recovery becomes far less possible. To be referred to SEDCAS (the specialist severe eating disorder service in Sussex) they require a BMI of 15 or less. It should not come down to BMI, and yet services are so stretched that they have to have such a strict criteria for referral. SEDCAS, for example, have been covering the whole of Sussex. Eating disorders are dangerous at any weight. You can die at any weight. People with bulimia are statistically less likely to be underweight, but purging causes so much damage to the heart, throat etc.
Then there is the issue that there are just no available beds in many parts of the country. People are getting transferred miles away from home because there are no local units, and that in itself causes problems because part of inpatient treatment for eating disorders needs to involve transitioning back to the community and having home leave to get practice in following the meal plan independently. My county has no adult eating disorder unit or beds at all. This means that the NHS has to fund inpatient treatment at a Priory unit in a nearby county, and that can of course also bring about problems with funding treatment. Having said that, the NHS funded my treatment for 5 months in the Priory, and whatever the difficulties are with mental health funding, I absolutely cannot fault the NHS for my treatment once I was in the system - it is important to note that there are very good experiences with mental health care as well!
If anyone has any questions or wants to talk about eating disorders/treatment, do feel free to quote me.
Specialist services are so notoriously difficult to get referred to. And the reality of eating disorders is that without early intervention, full recovery becomes far less possible. To be referred to SEDCAS (the specialist severe eating disorder service in Sussex) they require a BMI of 15 or less. It should not come down to BMI, and yet services are so stretched that they have to have such a strict criteria for referral. SEDCAS, for example, have been covering the whole of Sussex. Eating disorders are dangerous at any weight. You can die at any weight. People with bulimia are statistically less likely to be underweight, but purging causes so much damage to the heart, throat etc.
Then there is the issue that there are just no available beds in many parts of the country. People are getting transferred miles away from home because there are no local units, and that in itself causes problems because part of inpatient treatment for eating disorders needs to involve transitioning back to the community and having home leave to get practice in following the meal plan independently. My county has no adult eating disorder unit or beds at all. This means that the NHS has to fund inpatient treatment at a Priory unit in a nearby county, and that can of course also bring about problems with funding treatment. Having said that, the NHS funded my treatment for 5 months in the Priory, and whatever the difficulties are with mental health funding, I absolutely cannot fault the NHS for my treatment once I was in the system - it is important to note that there are very good experiences with mental health care as well!
If anyone has any questions or wants to talk about eating disorders/treatment, do feel free to quote me.
THE FIVE WAYS TO WELLBEING (New Economics Foundation)
So let's start somewhere easy. What are the five ways to wellbeing?
The five ways to wellbeing emerged from evidence-based research conducted by the think tank, the New Economics Foundation:
http://www.neweconomics.org/projects/entry/five-ways-to-well-being . Their research showed that if we encompass the five ways to wellbeing in our daily lives and use them on a regular basis, they can improve mood and reduce stress
The five ways to wellbeing, as outlined by the NEF, are:
GIVE, CONNECT, TAKE NOTICE, KEEP LEARNING, BE ACTIVE.
These words are quite broad in their meaning and can encompass a wide range of things. Some of them overlap too, in terms of crossing over the boundaries between categories. Examples for each category (though by no means a definitive list) include:
GIVE - giving yourself time and space to recharge the batteries or be yourself. Giving to the community. Giving to others - giving them a smile or a small gift. Giving up your time and energy to do something worthwhile, like volunteering!
CONNECT - connecting with others, be they known to you or a strange. Picking up the phone or writing someone a message via email or Facebook. Smiling at someone who seems sad, upset or lonely.
TAKE NOTICE - taking time to notice and appreciate things that we might otherwise miss, ignore or even avoid! Taking notice is being mindful (see an earlier post by @Liv1204 ) and really living in the present, rather than being stuck in the past or worrying about the future. It can be as simple as noticing different shades of pink on a flower petal!
KEEP LEARNING - obviously this can be educational-based but it doesn't have to be just that! It can be learning a new skill (e.g. baking, a language), a new hobby (sport, instruments) or just learning new facts about something that interests you!
BE ACTIVE - this can be being sporty, or just taking a quick walk around the block for exercise and fresh air. Being active can also mean using your initiative to get actively involved in things, be that commmunity-based work like volunteering, or even just being active in your own recovery by doing things to help yourself/get your voice heard.
Hope this gives people some ideas - many of us do incorporate the five ways to wellbeing already in some small ways. Have a think - do you use/do them all, and what could you improve on?
So let's start somewhere easy. What are the five ways to wellbeing?
The five ways to wellbeing emerged from evidence-based research conducted by the think tank, the New Economics Foundation:
http://www.neweconomics.org/projects/entry/five-ways-to-well-being . Their research showed that if we encompass the five ways to wellbeing in our daily lives and use them on a regular basis, they can improve mood and reduce stress
The five ways to wellbeing, as outlined by the NEF, are:
GIVE, CONNECT, TAKE NOTICE, KEEP LEARNING, BE ACTIVE.
These words are quite broad in their meaning and can encompass a wide range of things. Some of them overlap too, in terms of crossing over the boundaries between categories. Examples for each category (though by no means a definitive list) include:
GIVE - giving yourself time and space to recharge the batteries or be yourself. Giving to the community. Giving to others - giving them a smile or a small gift. Giving up your time and energy to do something worthwhile, like volunteering!
CONNECT - connecting with others, be they known to you or a strange. Picking up the phone or writing someone a message via email or Facebook. Smiling at someone who seems sad, upset or lonely.
TAKE NOTICE - taking time to notice and appreciate things that we might otherwise miss, ignore or even avoid! Taking notice is being mindful (see an earlier post by @Liv1204 ) and really living in the present, rather than being stuck in the past or worrying about the future. It can be as simple as noticing different shades of pink on a flower petal!
KEEP LEARNING - obviously this can be educational-based but it doesn't have to be just that! It can be learning a new skill (e.g. baking, a language), a new hobby (sport, instruments) or just learning new facts about something that interests you!
BE ACTIVE - this can be being sporty, or just taking a quick walk around the block for exercise and fresh air. Being active can also mean using your initiative to get actively involved in things, be that commmunity-based work like volunteering, or even just being active in your own recovery by doing things to help yourself/get your voice heard.
Hope this gives people some ideas - many of us do incorporate the five ways to wellbeing already in some small ways. Have a think - do you use/do them all, and what could you improve on?
Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd
Hope this gives people some ideas - many of us do incorporate the five ways to wellbeing already in some small ways. Have a think - do you use/do them all, and what could you improve on?
Hope this gives people some ideas - many of us do incorporate the five ways to wellbeing already in some small ways. Have a think - do you use/do them all, and what could you improve on?
I d say I use them all except I really need to work on being present, being on placement is quite stressful so spent too much time worrying about the future recently definitely need to work on being more mindful.
Original post by claireestelle
I d say I use them all except I really need to work on being present, being on placement is quite stressful so spent too much time worrying about the future recently definitely need to work on being more mindful.
Yeah being present/being mindful can be really difficult, especially when one is busy or has anxiety about the past/future. I definitely need to learn to "take notice" more and just be a bit more mindful and zen
Original post by StrawbAri
I've been waiting for this thread forever! 
Thanks so much LGH!
I would like to talk about ED's and about how no one takes them seriously. People just assume that if you have an ED you're just seeking for attention and no one really realizes that it's a serious mental health issue that could possibly lead to death. When I was at my lowest weight I had a lot of people accuse me of being shallow and apparently I was offending the the bigger girls. They had that idea that I was just being stupid and shallow for not eating when 'clearly' I'm bony enough and if anyone deserves to feel insecure it was them.
We really need to get rid of that idea becasue when we get people to actually understand what an ED is and how to notice when a loved one has one then the road to recovery for those that have one would be a lot shorter
Thanks so much LGH! I would like to talk about ED's and about how no one takes them seriously. People just assume that if you have an ED you're just seeking for attention and no one really realizes that it's a serious mental health issue that could possibly lead to death. When I was at my lowest weight I had a lot of people accuse me of being shallow and apparently I was offending the the bigger girls. They had that idea that I was just being stupid and shallow for not eating when 'clearly' I'm bony enough and if anyone deserves to feel insecure it was them.
We really need to get rid of that idea becasue when we get people to actually understand what an ED is and how to notice when a loved one has one then the road to recovery for those that have one would be a lot shorter
Thanks for your post - I think discussion of eating disorders is really important as the statistics apparently show that 1 in 5 young people show signs of an eating disorder
That's a lot higher than I had realised I don't personally consider myself to have an eating disorder, so I don't feel qualified to lead on that discussion. Perhaps you might like to write a bit more about your thoughts and experiences, to get a conversation going in this thread? I think it's really important that we address the issue of eating disorders, given how prevalent they are!
Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd
Yeah being present/being mindful can be really difficult, especially when one is busy or has anxiety about the past/future. I definitely need to learn to "take notice" more and just be a bit more mindful and zen
It is definitely difficult, I was going to take up yoga a while a go but didnt get far with it, think I ll give it a go again and see if it helps with being mindful.
Original post by claireestelle
It is definitely difficult, I was going to take up yoga a while a go but didnt get far with it, think I ll give it a go again and see if it helps with being mindful.
Oooh I'm sure yoga is very good, some of my friends swear by yoga
I think my problem is I'm naturally a very undisciplined person and so am not good at controlling breathing or thought spirals, or committing to something like yoga or meditation (or even prayer, in my case)
Original post by Liv1204
With regards to eating disorders and mental health services... YES, YES, YES. This is such a problem.
Specialist services are so notoriously difficult to get referred to. And the reality of eating disorders is that without early intervention, full recovery becomes far less possible. To be referred to SEDCAS (the specialist severe eating disorder service in Sussex) they require a BMI of 15 or less. It should not come down to BMI, and yet services are so stretched that they have to have such a strict criteria for referral. SEDCAS, for example, have been covering the whole of Sussex. Eating disorders are dangerous at any weight. You can die at any weight. People with bulimia are statistically less likely to be underweight, but purging causes so much damage to the heart, throat etc.
Then there is the issue that there are just no available beds in many parts of the country. People are getting transferred miles away from home because there are no local units, and that in itself causes problems because part of inpatient treatment for eating disorders needs to involve transitioning back to the community and having home leave to get practice in following the meal plan independently. My county has no adult eating disorder unit or beds at all. This means that the NHS has to fund inpatient treatment at a Priory unit in a nearby county, and that can of course also bring about problems with funding treatment. Having said that, the NHS funded my treatment for 5 months in the Priory, and whatever the difficulties are with mental health funding, I absolutely cannot fault the NHS for my treatment once I was in the system - it is important to note that there are very good experiences with mental health care as well!
If anyone has any questions or wants to talk about eating disorders/treatment, do feel free to quote me.
Specialist services are so notoriously difficult to get referred to. And the reality of eating disorders is that without early intervention, full recovery becomes far less possible. To be referred to SEDCAS (the specialist severe eating disorder service in Sussex) they require a BMI of 15 or less. It should not come down to BMI, and yet services are so stretched that they have to have such a strict criteria for referral. SEDCAS, for example, have been covering the whole of Sussex. Eating disorders are dangerous at any weight. You can die at any weight. People with bulimia are statistically less likely to be underweight, but purging causes so much damage to the heart, throat etc.
Then there is the issue that there are just no available beds in many parts of the country. People are getting transferred miles away from home because there are no local units, and that in itself causes problems because part of inpatient treatment for eating disorders needs to involve transitioning back to the community and having home leave to get practice in following the meal plan independently. My county has no adult eating disorder unit or beds at all. This means that the NHS has to fund inpatient treatment at a Priory unit in a nearby county, and that can of course also bring about problems with funding treatment. Having said that, the NHS funded my treatment for 5 months in the Priory, and whatever the difficulties are with mental health funding, I absolutely cannot fault the NHS for my treatment once I was in the system - it is important to note that there are very good experiences with mental health care as well!
If anyone has any questions or wants to talk about eating disorders/treatment, do feel free to quote me.
Sorry, missed this in my furious posting
Thanks very much for highlighting some of the issues regarding treatment of eating disorders. As mentioned above, I lack lived experience in this area so if you would be happy to lead and answer anyone's questions on eating disorders, that would be great Original post by Tiger Rag
Can someone please point me in the direction of Mindfullness please? It's been mentioned a few times. Although, I think GP only mentioned it because she thinks I'm depressed (I'm not) instead of sorting out what's really going on.
https://www.headspace.com/ (paying website)
http://bemindful.co.uk/
http://mindfulnessinschools.org/
In addition to @Liv1204 's great post about mindfulness, here are some extra websites that you may wish to look into
Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd
Oooh I'm sure yoga is very good, some of my friends swear by yoga
I think my problem is I'm naturally a very undisciplined person and so am not good at controlling breathing or thought spirals, or committing to something like yoga or meditation (or even prayer, in my case)
I think my problem is I'm naturally a very undisciplined person and so am not good at controlling breathing or thought spirals, or committing to something like yoga or meditation (or even prayer, in my case)
The breathing part of yoga is pretty difficult and i dont think I m much good at it. But the good thing about yoga is that you can get your own mat and learn it off youtube at home so it doesnt really matter if you dont feel like your particularly good at it as no one has to know
Original post by claireestelle
The breathing part of yoga is pretty difficult and i dont think I m much good at it. But the good thing about yoga is that you can get your own mat and learn it off youtube at home so it doesnt really matter if you dont feel like your particularly good at it as no one has to know
That's a very good point
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