How to tell over-attached (Muslim) family I want to move out in my second year?

WinterLover

I'm a girl.

Reply 1

alkaline.

lool i swear getting married is the only way

:/

Reply 2

username471863

Tell them that you're lonely at university and it's making you unhappy (not saying that's true), that you find it hard to meet people at home and that you need to study in the library late but it's only safe to do that when you're on/near campus. Remind them that you will come home for every holiday and that it's only 2 years.

Reply 3

mkap

Just reassure them you wont break there trust and you wont do anything which is stupid in their eyes (becoming an athiest, lesbian hippie)

Reply 4

WinterLover

Original post by alkaline.

lool i swear getting married is the only way

:/

My family isn't actually too pressed about marriage. My mother doesn't want me married until i'm in my 30's + and generally prefers my having a career.

Reply 5

geniequeen48

What has being a Muslim got to do with your situation?

Reply 6

MevMev

tell her you would rather be next to campus because its so much easier to access the library etc
tell her commuting gives u a headache everyday and that affects your concentration in lectures

Reply 7

WinterLover

Original post by geniequeen48

What has being a Muslim got to do with your situation?

Well Islam is notorious for giving girls little/no freedom, and although i'm lucky enough to have a somewhat liberal family, we are still Muslim when it comes down to it, and I wanted insight from other Muslim people.

Reply 8

geniequeen48

Original post by WinterLover

I disagree with you there and I don't want to have a debate. If that's how you see Islam, then okay.

Reply 9

WinterLover

Original post by geniequeen48

I disagree with you there and I don't want to have a debate. If that's how you see Islam, then okay.

*sigh*

There's really no point in getting into a sort of "but that's not really Islam" or "It's just the media lying" debate. I've heard it a million times, and it becomes a little boring. When it comes down to it, Islam does have a substantial amount of restriction on women as well as a lot of expectations and pressure infringed upon them. You might not feel it at the moment living in the Western world, but nonetheless it's still there in your household, and I honestly pray all the time for bettering the life of girls living under more restricting regimes across this world. It honestly makes me so sad to know how many dreams and life potential are being crushed due to not having girls being able to express themselves.

Reply 10

AhmadLahmad

Salam alaik. You should sit down and talk about it and ask her why whe doesnt want you to leave.

Make a compromise such as, moving into a dorm at your uni and coming home on the weekends.

Reply 11

geniequeen48

Original post by WinterLover

May I ask what restrictions you are referring to? Dreams and life potential being crushed? What do you mean? Girls not being able to express themselves? I'm sorry but I'd say that's from culture, not religion, although it's more common in Muslim countries for girls to be presented as people with no say, the problem is with the culture, which coincidentally falls with the religion. Perhaps your views of restrictions of girls in Islam may be different from mine.