'Informal meeting' with department

Hi

I'm a postgrad at the University of Manchester. Last week I had an altercation with another student on my course involving workstations. None of us own the workstations but he claimed I was using 'his' and logged me off and shoved me away. I told him that if he was going to log me out of a computer i was using then he could move my stuff for me. He interpreted that as me calling him a slave and started saying how he was going to beat me up after uni etc.

Now it seems he has filed a formal complaint against me with my department and now I have to attend an informal meeting tomorrow with the director of teaching and my course coordinator. I'm really worried about how this will go since he's playing the race card, i'm just worried that because of race and the fact that he filed the complaint they'll believe him over me.

A fair amount of the class saw what happened but he's more popular than me so some of them would back him. I just really don't want to get in trouble for something I didn't do. I also don't want to get kicked off my course or accept a warning but at the same time I don't want this to turn into a massive deal since its already stressing me out.

Does anyone have any experience of informal meetings or haave any advice for me? It's really stressful

I said 'If you're taking my workstation then you're going to move my stuff to another desk for me'. To which he responded by asking me if i called him a slave. Perhaps it was a poor choice of words but i didn't mean to imply that he was my slave or mean anything racial. I'm from an ethnic background anyway, so I know firsthand how hurtful racial comments can be

Thanks, its really good advice. I mentioned the situation to someone on my course this evening and she offered to come with me to the meeting
since she saw what happened and heard what was said. She's also the student representative for our course too which is good. I'm hoping it will
go alright, I know the lecturers who the meeting is with and they seem like reasonable people so fingers crossed. It'll be nice to get it over with, its
been looming over me for the past few days

I would say (don't ask) in advance that you're bringing her. As she's the course rep, you've got a good argument for having her there specifically, and the fact that she was a witness could work in your favour if the other student has lied or exaggerated to them.

Again, try not to be defensive, or assume anything about what the other student has said. However, do be super clear that he was the one to threaten you.

Hopefully the uni will deal with this sensibly and you'll be able to get things over with in a few days.

Good luck, and let us know how the meeting goes

I would say (don't ask) in advance that you're bringing her. As she's the course rep, you've got a good argument for having her there specifically, and the fact that she was a witness could work in your favour if the other student has lied or exaggerated to them.

Again, try not to be defensive, or assume anything about what the other student has said. However, do be super clear that he was the one to threaten you.

Hopefully the uni will deal with this sensibly and you'll be able to get things over with in a few days.

Good luck, and let us know how the meeting goes

The rules either allow her there or they do not. If they do not and she is sent away because they didnt bother to check, then she has wasted her time. Course rep or not if it says no it should mean no becayse that would be unfair on everyone else.

I would be very wary about attending a meeting of this kind unaccompanied- partly just because it can be hard to remember what was said. If university policy was to not allow you to be accompanied, it would be very poor practice and if it were me I probably would refuse to attend the meeting. If they want to insist on you being unaccompanied, it's usually because they intend on trying to pressure you into agreeing to something, or because they are doing something that's not quite allowed in the rules.

Also, as it's only an "informal meeting", they shouldn't have any problem with the student bringing someone else to the meeting as a "notetaker".

It goes the other way though. Informal means informal i.e the lecturer just wnats a heads up. He should identify what the meeting is fior and if need be or he is uncomfortable he should withdraw, he could also ask to take a recording.

I dont know the department or lecturer.

Perhaps thye have a next stage where they make a specific allowance fo a rep and it would be more appropriate then. If im the lecturer and a rep comes as well then I might find that more awkward, when all i wanted was the facts.

Even in a work environment it's accepted practice to allow the people involved to bring a thrid party/rep to informal meetings.

It's no big deal and as loris says uf they refuse a thrid party then it's perfectly acceptable to refuse to attend the meeting.

It goes the other way though. Informal means informal i.e the lecturer just wnats a heads up. He should identify what the meeting is fior and if need be or he is uncomfortable he should withdraw, he could also ask to take a recording.

I dont know the department or lecturer.

Perhaps thye have a next stage where they make a specific allowance fo a rep and it would be more appropriate then. If im the lecturer and a rep comes as well then I might find that more awkward, when all i wanted was the facts.