My boyfriend seriously hit me but this is also our kink ! help?

your English is excellent !

s̶o̶ So is y̶o̶u̶r̶s̶ ̶!̶ your's!

Traffic light safety words.

Red = too far stop everything
Yellow = slow down I'm nearing read
Green = this is great can go for more.

That being said you crying and him continuing is very worrying, it implies he is either careless or actively doesn't care both are very dangerous when engaging in risky kinks, especially the last one and I would say ending things probably is the safest and best thing for you to do.

Now if you have engaged in rape play in the past it is possible he misunderstood and thought that was what was happening in which case I could say that you really need to out right make it clear before hand that it's something you are going to be doing, preferably before hand saying that you want to engage in some rape play. Even so he should be checking on you regularly during (especially with rape play) and the fact he hasn't is also very worrying , it implies once again carelessness or active uncaringness.

At the very lest you need a serious conversation with him talking through adding more safety measure. Remeber SSC ( safe sane consensual) or RASK (risk awareness consensual kink) or some other similar system in place to make things as clear as possible. Consent is a vitally important thing and always will be.

^ bolded

Is the traffic light thing a normal tactic used for couples that enjoy this type of fetish?

I have been known to use it, not sure if it's common, just sayin

Support team edit 16:30- Yes this is a long post. Please give helpful comments or just don't comment. Posting saying that it is too long or you didn't read it is not helpful.

So I'm a college law student and my boyfriend is a 30 years old respectable lawyer. Let's start with the fact that I really love him and so does he, he always cares about me first, always texts me even if he's at work, cares about my health more than my family does, is supportive with my anxiety/depression, orders for me, etc.

Today after college I decided to put up with my boyfriend. The thing is that we were both very tired. We cuddled a bit on his couch, squeezed and dry humped at first until he got really horny. I like it rough, I like to get pinned down, slapped, pushed, dominated verbally and physically; not into extremes (I like to have my breast untouched no matter what, only a gentle grab and that's all). I told my boyfriend about my kink a whole ago and he was like: Oh, I haven't done this at all, honestly, I don't know if I'm into this but I might try to get a bit of dominant with you. So he started to get horny, pinned me down on the couch, squeezed me, grabbed my hands with his hand and started to slap me from slowly to hard. He had saying thing like : ''have you been nice, do you disagree with me?, are you saying something (as in shut up already)" while slapping me.

I was semi-okay with it. I say semi because he slapped me too many times but I liked it. He, then, got on top of me, hold my hands and gave me a very angry look. We would sometimes stop, chuckle and ask ourselves if we're okay with things we do. He rarely asked me this time but he did a few times though. Fast-forward we do this cuddle-rough-play for a long-ish amount of time.

Then, out of nowhere, grabbed my hand and dragged me off the couch, dragged me to the middle of the room and told me to get on my knees to do oral. The grab shocked me but the rest was okay, I like to look at him, get slapped and continue to do oral. I was fine with this but the grab! I like to get very submissive and choke, spit. After a while we went on the couch to do vaginal sex and I came first. When he heard my I'm-going-to-cum moans slapped my face and ruined the orgasm.

I asked him what's the spot on his penis (I couldn't see clearly because it was late but it was a spot !!! not a line or something from the 'scratch' and he said : Oh, I didn't want to upset you the last time we hooked up (3 weeks ago!) but you scratched my penis badly and every time I showered the wound tissue would fall off and the healing cycle would being again plus the fact that towel moves when I'm drying contributed. I told him: Oh, I thought you've been naughty and did some nasty things out there. He replied: I'm very horrified you'd think I'd do this.Yes, it looked like a tiny dot of a healing wound but I didn't bite his dick...wouldn't that leave a line instead of a dot? It looked like a scab indeed but I couldn't see it clearly. He couldn't come anymore because of what I said and of me proceeding to lay down and breathe like a steamy pot and not wanting to do anything with my vagina/mouth.

After that we went to bed because I wanted to comfortably lay down. I hugged him and said: I came fast because I skipped few doses of my antidepressants. The hell here began: he started to slap my face really badly few times while saying in an angry tone: ''I knew you would do this, I knew you would do a ******** mistake" until I burst out crying and roll over to turn my back on him and the face buried in the bed. He grabbed me, turned me around and slapped me few times again even though I was crying like a newborn! (it's not a big deal to me personally that I skipped a few doses, he knows this). After this, I hugged him and continued to cry even harder while trying to say: you hit too hard. He said: you deserve even worse for doing that. Then he gently rolled over me, grabbed my head and proceed to repeatedly kiss my lips fast asking me if I'm okay. After I calmed down I went in the living room sitting on the couch alone. As I walked through the hall, he was behind me and I nervously laughed about how hard he hit me. He jokingly told me to walk faster in a rude way and I told him: you do that! He slap-punched my vagina because I turn around while saying that...Ouchie

We went to cuddle on the couch and I told him to stop swearing. He said: no, I do whatever I want, I'm the leader. I told him no, not when you're swearing. I'm NOT okay with this. I started to cry again. He said if I stop crying he would stop swearing me from now on. We agreed. He told me he felt really bad when I started to cry and didn't want to cuddle me anymore because I was crying even more and that would make him angry(angrier?). Let's not mention he always pinches me really hard no matter when/what we do. He says he feels good after doing so.So what can I do? I talked to him about it and he said he's only doing this only if provoked, only if I push him first/say a rude thing due to his volcanic temper. He also said if he's coming home and I waste my time instead of cooking dinner he'd get mad and start to swear at me.

I love him so much... If you've reached this far I thank you for reading and I'm yearning to read your comments. I also apologize for my English, I'm not a native. I hope I haven't forgotten something. Thank you again!

Wouldn't that be such a mood killer ?

Is the traffic light thing a normal tactic used for couples that enjoy this type of fetish?

Support team edit 16:30- Yes this is a long post. Please give helpful comments or just don't comment. Posting saying that it is too long or you didn't read it is not helpful.

So I'm a college law student and my boyfriend is a 30 years old respectable lawyer. Let's start with the fact that I really love him and so does he, he always cares about me first, always texts me even if he's at work, cares about my health more than my family does, is supportive with my anxiety/depression, orders for me, etc.

Today after college I decided to put up with my boyfriend. The thing is that we were both very tired. We cuddled a bit on his couch, squeezed and dry humped at first until he got really horny. I like it rough, I like to get pinned down, slapped, pushed, dominated verbally and physically; not into extremes (I like to have my breast untouched no matter what, only a gentle grab and that's all). I told my boyfriend about my kink a whole ago and he was like: Oh, I haven't done this at all, honestly, I don't know if I'm into this but I might try to get a bit of dominant with you. So he started to get horny, pinned me down on the couch, squeezed me, grabbed my hands with his hand and started to slap me from slowly to hard. He had saying thing like : ''have you been nice, do you disagree with me?, are you saying something (as in shut up already)" while slapping me.

I was semi-okay with it. I say semi because he slapped me too many times but I liked it. He, then, got on top of me, hold my hands and gave me a very angry look. We would sometimes stop, chuckle and ask ourselves if we're okay with things we do. He rarely asked me this time but he did a few times though. Fast-forward we do this cuddle-rough-play for a long-ish amount of time.

Then, out of nowhere, grabbed my hand and dragged me off the couch, dragged me to the middle of the room and told me to get on my knees to do oral. The grab shocked me but the rest was okay, I like to look at him, get slapped and continue to do oral. I was fine with this but the grab! I like to get very submissive and choke, spit. After a while we went on the couch to do vaginal sex and I came first. When he heard my I'm-going-to-cum moans slapped my face and ruined the orgasm.

I asked him what's the spot on his penis (I couldn't see clearly because it was late but it was a spot !!! not a line or something from the 'scratch' and he said : Oh, I didn't want to upset you the last time we hooked up (3 weeks ago!) but you scratched my penis badly and every time I showered the wound tissue would fall off and the healing cycle would being again plus the fact that towel moves when I'm drying contributed. I told him: Oh, I thought you've been naughty and did some nasty things out there. He replied: I'm very horrified you'd think I'd do this.Yes, it looked like a tiny dot of a healing wound but I didn't bite his dick...wouldn't that leave a line instead of a dot? It looked like a scab indeed but I couldn't see it clearly. He couldn't come anymore because of what I said and of me proceeding to lay down and breathe like a steamy pot and not wanting to do anything with my vagina/mouth.

After that we went to bed because I wanted to comfortably lay down. I hugged him and said: I came fast because I skipped few doses of my antidepressants. The hell here began: he started to slap my face really badly few times while saying in an angry tone: ''I knew you would do this, I knew you would do a ******** mistake" until I burst out crying and roll over to turn my back on him and the face buried in the bed. He grabbed me, turned me around and slapped me few times again even though I was crying like a newborn! (it's not a big deal to me personally that I skipped a few doses, he knows this). After this, I hugged him and continued to cry even harder while trying to say: you hit too hard. He said: you deserve even worse for doing that. Then he gently rolled over me, grabbed my head and proceed to repeatedly kiss my lips fast asking me if I'm okay. After I calmed down I went in the living room sitting on the couch alone. As I walked through the hall, he was behind me and I nervously laughed about how hard he hit me. He jokingly told me to walk faster in a rude way and I told him: you do that! He slap-punched my vagina because I turn around while saying that...Ouchie

We went to cuddle on the couch and I told him to stop swearing. He said: no, I do whatever I want, I'm the leader. I told him no, not when you're swearing. I'm NOT okay with this. I started to cry again. He said if I stop crying he would stop swearing me from now on. We agreed. He told me he felt really bad when I started to cry and didn't want to cuddle me anymore because I was crying even more and that would make him angry(angrier?). Let's not mention he always pinches me really hard no matter when/what we do. He says he feels good after doing so.So what can I do? I talked to him about it and he said he's only doing this only if provoked, only if I push him first/say a rude thing due to his volcanic temper. He also said if he's coming home and I waste my time instead of cooking dinner he'd get mad and start to swear at me.

I love him so much... If you've reached this far I thank you for reading and I'm yearning to read your comments. I also apologize for my English, I'm not a native. I hope I haven't forgotten something. Thank you again!

How are people okay with what just happened?

Even if you skip the fact that she's into this kinky stuff and asked to be dominated it does NOT give him the right to act like a dick, especially if you read the last two paragraphs you'll see some of the stuff he did was not in a sexual setting either e.g. slapping her when she forgot her antidepressants or pinching her etc.

OP, please get out of this relationship. It sounds abusive. Please stay safe x

feel like im reading 50 shades of grey

Christ almighty! I second your this response

i can tolerate most things for example (in any context) hair pulling, nudges etc, slapping = starting to make me mad but pinching? wow that makes me go from 'cool' to 'im gonna rip your ****ing head off' in like 0.2 seconds

pinching is my red button

^ bolded

Is the traffic light thing a normal tactic used for couples that enjoy this type of fetish?

Wouldn't that be such a mood killer ?