am i being used for sex??

I've been talking to this guy for a few weeks now, we haven't met yet. we have been talking every day and we have a lot in common. he is genuinely very nice and I do like him (little crush nothing major) at the start of talking(on sc) I was wearing a top that was a little revealing, not that I could help it as I am naturally bigger, and he said that he did not want to disrespect me and that if I was doing it on purpose he didn't want me to feel like this was all he was talking to me for. the weeks have gone and we have talked about sex n stuff, not a lot but it pops up now and then and we joke about it..
but I'm getting the feeling that he only wants to meet with me or talk to me so that he can sleep with me. I want to ask him if that is all he wants but I don't want to insult him if it isnt...what should I do?!?!
(((I'm 18 still but never slept with anyone before, but have done stuff with my ex))))

(edited 8 years ago)

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Reply 1

1420787

If you aren't having sex, you aren't being used for sex.

Reply 2

DeliciousAbs

Original post by offhegoes

If you aren't having sex, you aren't being used for sex.

This.

Reply 3

Kenneyx

as in, is he talking to me just so that he can have sex with me

Original post by offhegoes

If you aren't having sex, you aren't being used for sex.

Reply 4

DeliciousAbs

Original post by Kenneyx

as in, is he talking to me just so that he can have sex with me

Probably yes. That's the only/main reason most guys talk to girls.

Reply 5

Cyber_Punk_

Original post by Kenneyx

Sorry, but you just sound really not experienced, which is ok. It just means you will **** up your first few relationships instead of just realising to CHILL OUT. Like now for example, you are doing the whole what if thing.

So don't have sex then, would that make you feel better? What's wrong with sex? If a guy has sex with you that mean he has used you? You should feel empowered and that you used him! Anyway you are lucky that this guy seems to be A LOT more caring than most guys. Most guys will just send you a picture of their dick. lol.

Reply 6

username2284409

I don't get why guys have to say that they won't disrespect a woman to me this shouts: I will disrespect you. (I am a guy)

Reply 7

samina_ay

You already know the answer to your own question..

Reply 8

EdwardBarfield9

Don't worry. I was in this EXACT situation at little while back with a girl. Speaking from the males side I don't think he is talking to you just so that he can sleep with you, I know I never did so. On the other hand he may be but I doubt it.

Don't listen to society or stereotypes. A lot of guys do not talk to girls or guys expecting sex.

Reply 9

Kenneyx

Original post by Jimib5863

Ive had a few long relationships before so i am experienced and have done everything but sex. i do doubt a lot and i know that. Im not one for 'first times need to be special' bc to me it can be just sex ...however i do not want my first time to be with someone whose just talking to me to have sex, i have a friend who was used by this guy who took her virginity then left the next day and never spoke to her again..i dont want to be that girl.

Reply 10

Kenneyx

Original post by samina_ay

You already know the answer to your own question..

dont need an answer i need advice, that is what this website is for

Reply 11

urbanlocations

Sounds like a snapchat **** friend that's all :wink:

Reply 12

samina_ay

Original post by Kenneyx

dont need an answer i need advice, that is what this website is for

Lol stop talking to him then, if you feel he is gonna use you for sex. It isn't that hard(?)

Reply 13

Arsenal96

Original post by Kenneyx

He is definitely using you for sex. I know many people who play this game

Reply 14

Cyber_Punk_

Original post by Kenneyx

i have a friend who was used by this guy who took her virginity then left the next day and never spoke to her again..i dont want to be that girl.

Wait what!? Did you even just say that? His past history has already answered your thread's question.

Reply 15

Kenneyx

Original post by Jimib5863

Wait what!? Did you even just say that? His past history has already answered your thread's question.

noooooooooooo ononno it was a different guy...sorry shouldve made that clearer

Reply 16

Cyber_Punk_

Original post by Arsenal96

He is definitely using you for sex. I know many people who play this game

and what game is that? The secret evil having sex and then the world carrys on spinning? SHOCK HORROR.

Yes. Sex is evil, it's the devil, and you should never have sex. There. Problem solved.

(edited 8 years ago)

Reply 17

MaseratiJay

Whether he is or isn't...you can set the pace. So if you eventually do meet and he tries diving into your trousers as if it were the Olympics then you know he was talking to you for that reason alone.

You don't need to ask him anything..if you ask him if he's using you for sex (and he is) what do you think he'll say? Of course he'll say no.

Just go with the flow and let him know your boundaries/limits..if he's interested/respectful he'll understand and won't push you.

Reply 18

whorace

Why would you ask him?

'Are you using me for sex'
'No'

Because if I were I would be an upstanding guy who admitted it.

Reply 19

Cyber_Punk_

Original post by MaseratiJay

Sorry, that doesn't work. I usually watch TV with a girl and NEVER make a first move AT ALL. Then she'll jump on top of me, because I made her wait and she wants me more than I want her, but more just me being in a relaxed way. See? I don't rush yet still got the sex, rushing is not an indicator, unless they are a horny 16 yr old.

Just because she has sex with me doens't mean she now owns me, has power over me. I don't owe her/women anything. I am living life a free spirit.