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I have no respect for my mother and I feel guilty
I've been thinking about my childhood a lot recently and I've reached a point where I have no respect for my mother, i kind of despise her. I always see people posting messages about how their mother is 'the best' and I feel sad because i can't say the same about my mom.
She's honestly not a great parent. When I was in primary school, my older brother who was in like year 9 at the time beat me up and gave me a black eye. He was not punished. On another occasion, he punched me in the mouth and burst my lip, again, she just made a stupid 'oh you nearly killed my baby' comment, and he was not punished. I know that siblings fight but i can't imagine any of my friend's parents' being okay with this sort of violence.
She also feels like it's okay to physically hit me when I don't do as she says. I'm 19. I wish I'd had a good mother who'd raised me with kindness and reasoning. Her parenting began and ended with threats to hit me if I didn't do as she says. There's really no reasoning with her in anything. She's shallow and has no depth to her. She has no hobbies and interests other than religion. I don't even know why I'm writing this. I'm just feeling particularly upset today and I guess I just need to rant.
She's honestly not a great parent. When I was in primary school, my older brother who was in like year 9 at the time beat me up and gave me a black eye. He was not punished. On another occasion, he punched me in the mouth and burst my lip, again, she just made a stupid 'oh you nearly killed my baby' comment, and he was not punished. I know that siblings fight but i can't imagine any of my friend's parents' being okay with this sort of violence.
She also feels like it's okay to physically hit me when I don't do as she says. I'm 19. I wish I'd had a good mother who'd raised me with kindness and reasoning. Her parenting began and ended with threats to hit me if I didn't do as she says. There's really no reasoning with her in anything. She's shallow and has no depth to her. She has no hobbies and interests other than religion. I don't even know why I'm writing this. I'm just feeling particularly upset today and I guess I just need to rant.
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Actually I don't feel guilty at all. I know she's probably better than a lot of other mothers out there but I just wish I had a better one.
If your mother treated you like that, then you have every reason not to respect her.
You earn respect. You don't demand it.
You earn respect. You don't demand it.
Sorry to hear OP.
Are you, by any chance, a girl in a Muslim family?
Are you, by any chance, a girl in a Muslim family?
Don't feel guilty about it, I know there is an awful lot of ''propaganda'' in society to suggest that you should love, respect and honour etc. your parents but from what it sounds like based on your post, she doesn't deserve respect at all.
My mother has been pretty shitty to me as well, there's not much we can do about it so just move on and leave her in the past.
Most importantly, when(if) you have children, promise yourself you won't make the same mistakes.
My mother has been pretty shitty to me as well, there's not much we can do about it so just move on and leave her in the past.
Most importantly, when(if) you have children, promise yourself you won't make the same mistakes.
Original post by Anonymous
Sorry to hear OP.
Are you, by any chance, a girl in a Muslim family?
Are you, by any chance, a girl in a Muslim family?
How did you come to that conclusion?
Original post by Anonymous
Sorry to hear OP.
Are you, by any chance, a girl in a Muslim family?
Are you, by any chance, a girl in a Muslim family?
Nope, Christian!
She probably doesnt realise that she's doing something wrong, as this may have been due to the way her own parents brought her up. Try talking to her about how you feel and what she's done to make you feel the way that you do. If she doesn't listen to that, try being the grown up about the situation and shower her with kindness and respect, even though it sounds like she doesnt really deserve it. Good luck, hopefully you'll work through your differences.
Parents don't realize that their kids actually grow up and remember these things.
And one day they will grow old and need you.
And one day they will grow old and need you.
Original post by SageJiraiya
She probably doesnt realise that she's doing something wrong, as this may have been due to the way her own parents brought her up. Try talking to her about how you feel and what she's done to make you feel the way that you do. If she doesn't listen to that, try being the grown up about the situation and shower her with kindness and respect, even though it sounds like she doesnt really deserve it. Good luck, hopefully you'll work through your differences.
That is a sorry excuse. Surely you'd know how it feels then and do the opposite.
Original post by Anonymous
Actually I don't feel guilty at all. I know she's probably better than a lot of other mothers out there but I just wish I had a better one.
Respect is earned.
Original post by xobeauty
Parents don't realize that their kids actually grow up and remember these things.
And one day they will grow old and need you.
And one day they will grow old and need you.
There is something sinister about this
Original post by xobeauty
That is a sorry excuse. Surely you'd know how it feels then and do the opposite.
By all means, I'm not saying that what she's done is justifiable: quute frankly it sounds very tough living with a parent like that. I'm sinply trying to offer a possible explanation behind her behavior.
Original post by whorace
There is something sinister about this
It sounds bad but it's karma.
(edited 8 years ago)
Original post by Anonymous
Sorry to hear OP.
Are you, by any chance, a girl in a Muslim family?
Are you, by any chance, a girl in a Muslim family?
Oh come on.
Just wondering, why would you speculate that in particular?Original post by Anonymous
I've been thinking about my childhood a lot recently and I've reached a point where I have no respect for my mother, i kind of despise her. I always see people posting messages about how their mother is 'the best' and I feel sad because i can't say the same about my mom.
She's honestly not a great parent. When I was in primary school, my older brother who was in like year 9 at the time beat me up and gave me a black eye. He was not punished. On another occasion, he punched me in the mouth and burst my lip, again, she just made a stupid 'oh you nearly killed my baby' comment, and he was not punished. I know that siblings fight but i can't imagine any of my friend's parents' being okay with this sort of violence.
She also feels like it's okay to physically hit me when I don't do as she says. I'm 19. I wish I'd had a good mother who'd raised me with kindness and reasoning. Her parenting began and ended with threats to hit me if I didn't do as she says. There's really no reasoning with her in anything. She's shallow and has no depth to her. She has no hobbies and interests other than religion. I don't even know why I'm writing this. I'm just feeling particularly upset today and I guess I just need to rant.
She's honestly not a great parent. When I was in primary school, my older brother who was in like year 9 at the time beat me up and gave me a black eye. He was not punished. On another occasion, he punched me in the mouth and burst my lip, again, she just made a stupid 'oh you nearly killed my baby' comment, and he was not punished. I know that siblings fight but i can't imagine any of my friend's parents' being okay with this sort of violence.
She also feels like it's okay to physically hit me when I don't do as she says. I'm 19. I wish I'd had a good mother who'd raised me with kindness and reasoning. Her parenting began and ended with threats to hit me if I didn't do as she says. There's really no reasoning with her in anything. She's shallow and has no depth to her. She has no hobbies and interests other than religion. I don't even know why I'm writing this. I'm just feeling particularly upset today and I guess I just need to rant.
i know how you feel, its got to the point where i have no emotion towards her but anger and resentment. i get so upset and jealous when i see other people with their mums and my mums behaves the way she does, its honestly heartbreaking. But at least your mum is in your life (or maybe not), my mum doesnt even want to see her kids. pm me if you want to talk, i can definitely relate.
OP seriously its okay. I know parents are considered to be extremely crucial and someone who should be respected. However, some parents are just not worth it. For those who have a stable family life with loving and caring parents, it must be a big deal. They haven't seen the lives of broken homes. It sucks. Parents are meant to be there for you to take care of you, love you and comfort you, provide peace, not to beat you, emotionally, physically or mentally scar you. I have no attachment with my mother at all. She left me when I was a baby and I have only seen her for a few times since then. Only I know how deprived I felt growing up as a child. Seeing my friends and cousins and their mothers giving them packed lunch, buying them gifts, my friends telling me stories about how they went home and told her mother about their everyday life etc.
Its okay. If your parents never gave you that love and care, how can they expect the same love and care from you.
Its okay. If your parents never gave you that love and care, how can they expect the same love and care from you.
Original post by loveleest
I just hate how society forces you to love your parents despite them being a ****. If your parents dont respect you then you don't have to respect them back.
i think this has changed a lot and will be eradicated completely once Britain becomes at least 50% single parent household, which i think will occur rapidly. not sure on the current % though.
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