Well this was unexpected. I don't know ocd or obsession or whatever. In simple terms, I really liked this girl. I was crazy about her true. But despite everything, she was my friend. Whether she deserved it or acted like it I don't know. But it felt real to me. I remember so many good memories (bad ones too)
She was very cruel rude hypocritical etc sometimes. I honestly was just honest with her and told her that I didn't like the way she was treating me and everything and she just said its my life I do what I want it's not your business etc.
This hurt me.
For example she messaged me on Saturday. All normal. Then Sunday I messaged her and she had a go at me saying don't disturb me, don't talk on the weekends etc.
How can she say that? She messages me herself all the time and she says that to me?
I was there for her time after time after time. I honestly did the world for her.
I ditched other friends just to spend time with her. I broke my plans to help her out. I cared about her more than myself. I put so much time and effort into her. Which was wrong I know.
But, she just dropped me so easily.
I do blame myself a lot. For my childish behaviour, for that I always became upset for small reasons etc. But she was very curl and heartless.
She replaced me with another friend. I used to be her best friend. She said this guy is my best friend (even though he told her that he is in love with her for 3yrs) she was upset about that but now they are all normal. She is with him all the time.
She replaced me. She forgot about me. She dropped me. She didn't care about me. She didn't give me a chance. She even threatened me.
Do u see why I am so upset and heartbroken?
Yes you all told me to drop her etc, but I just couldn't bring myself to do that. I just wanted to enjoy our time left together.
Also, since for my entire time at uni, I spent it with her, now I feel rather alone and isolated. Yes I have a few other friends but it's just not the same. They are all so supportive and are helping me, talking to me etc, but still it's just hurting.
Oh this is so hard. Please understand me. I'm not asking for sympathy or anything like that. I'm just really struggling.