The Student Room Group

Bad driving instructors

Hey I'm on my 15th lesson, and I'm contemplating whether or not to leave my driving instructor for the following reasons:
1) to me he seems impatient, in the sense that he expects me to either drive at a higher level or at an expected level, which is understandable, however, because he's a teacher he should be able to understand that as a beginner I am still vulnerable to making the small mistakes, he's been driving for 13 years! He may have had faster learning students but as a teacher he should be able to deal with slow learners I.e. Me

2) he nags/snaps and makes me feel down when I drive, and really that doesn't help, if I make a mistake, I wouldn't like to be snapped at, I'd want my teacher to be calm and not kind of shout or constantly criticise me or say phrase "I'm telling you for the last time" or constantly moan or sigh, I can hear it and it makes me more nervous/frustrated and brings down my confidence. I basically feel like I have to drive perfectly in order to not be criticised I don't feel like I'm learning.

3) after every lesson, whether I feel like it's a better one than the one before or not, I come home feeing sick to my stomach, like I just couldn't wait till it's over because I'm not enjoying my lessons, he constantly makes me feel **** because he's expecting me to be a fast learner or not make mistakes, I sit next to people who have been driving manual for years and still stall/not change gear properly.

I don't know whether to change after 15 lessons, I found this guy on gum tree for my area in north west London and "people" said he has put up their confidence but I feel like he's stepping on my throat for every mistake I make, and therefore I feel like I can't perfect them because he can't come to understand that I'm a slow learner or get more nervous the way he acts.

This being said I still consider that, ok I know it took me a while to get used to the clutch control, driving in London and in traffic is stressful and ye I've even stalled in my 15th lesson, I understand the biting point etc, and I've never ever driven before these 15 hours and I fee like he's expecting me to be some professional driver and never make mistakes again. I accept it took me a while, and I could have been a little careless at times in terms of wheel movement, but I've aced that however I still dread going to my lessons because of the way he acts and is ignorant to my learning process.

I'm kind of stuck on what to do, because 15 hours is a lot and I've come a long way from starting from scratch, however like I said, he doesn't build my confidence, makes me more nervous as I fee like I have to "impress him" and lastly I feel **** going into the car and leaving the lesson. What do you guys think I should do and share your experiences below if you want.
Original post by ZZ97
Hey I'm on my 15th lesson, and I'm contemplating whether or not to leave my driving instructor for the following reasons:
1) to me he seems impatient, in the sense that he expects me to either drive at a higher level or at an expected level, which is understandable, however, because he's a teacher he should be able to understand that as a beginner I am still vulnerable to making the small mistakes, he's been driving for 13 years! He may have had faster learning students but as a teacher he should be able to deal with slow learners I.e. Me

2) he nags/snaps and makes me feel down when I drive, and really that doesn't help, if I make a mistake, I wouldn't like to be snapped at, I'd want my teacher to be calm and not kind of shout or constantly criticise me or say phrase "I'm telling you for the last time" or constantly moan or sigh, I can hear it and it makes me more nervous/frustrated and brings down my confidence. I basically feel like I have to drive perfectly in order to not be criticised I don't feel like I'm learning.

3) after every lesson, whether I feel like it's a better one than the one before or not, I come home feeing sick to my stomach, like I just couldn't wait till it's over because I'm not enjoying my lessons, he constantly makes me feel **** because he's expecting me to be a fast learner or not make mistakes, I sit next to people who have been driving manual for years and still stall/not change gear properly.

I don't know whether to change after 15 lessons, I found this guy on gum tree for my area in north west London and "people" said he has put up their confidence but I feel like he's stepping on my throat for every mistake I make, and therefore I feel like I can't perfect them because he can't come to understand that I'm a slow learner or get more nervous the way he acts.

This being said I still consider that, ok I know it took me a while to get used to the clutch control, driving in London and in traffic is stressful and ye I've even stalled in my 15th lesson, I understand the biting point etc, and I've never ever driven before these 15 hours and I fee like he's expecting me to be some professional driver and never make mistakes again. I accept it took me a while, and I could have been a little careless at times in terms of wheel movement, but I've aced that however I still dread going to my lessons because of the way he acts and is ignorant to my learning process.

I'm kind of stuck on what to do, because 15 hours is a lot and I've come a long way from starting from scratch, however like I said, he doesn't build my confidence, makes me more nervous as I fee like I have to "impress him" and lastly I feel **** going into the car and leaving the lesson. What do you guys think I should do and share your experiences below if you want.


Having put three children through driving lessons - I feel I am qualified to comment.

Did you know that instructors are graded - I think it is up to a grade 6. - 6 being the best. I went with a variety of instructors until I realised this - my first child failed twice and then passed when I found him a level 6. My other two passed first time - guess what level they had?!

http://www.1stdrive.com/grade5adi.htm
Reply 2
Find a new instructor if you feel uncomfortable. You dont pay him to put you down.

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Reply 3
Original post by squeakysquirrel
Having put three children through driving lessons - I feel I am qualified to comment.

Did you know that instructors are graded - I think it is up to a grade 6. - 6 being the best. I went with a variety of instructors until I realised this - my first child failed twice and then passed when I found him a level 6. My other two passed first time - guess what level they had?!

http://www.1stdrive.com/grade5adi.htm


yes it goes up to level 6. my driving instructor has been rated a 6 :smile:
Reply 4
the rating is not worth the paper it is written on ...
Original post by ZZ97
Hey I'm on my 15th lesson, and I'm contemplating whether or not to leave my driving instructor for the following reasons:
1) to me he seems impatient, in the sense that he expects me to either drive at a higher level or at an expected level, which is understandable, however, because he's a teacher he should be able to understand that as a beginner I am still vulnerable to making the small mistakes, he's been driving for 13 years! He may have had faster learning students but as a teacher he should be able to deal with slow learners I.e. Me

2) he nags/snaps and makes me feel down when I drive, and really that doesn't help, if I make a mistake, I wouldn't like to be snapped at, I'd want my teacher to be calm and not kind of shout or constantly criticise me or say phrase "I'm telling you for the last time" or constantly moan or sigh, I can hear it and it makes me more nervous/frustrated and brings down my confidence. I basically feel like I have to drive perfectly in order to not be criticised I don't feel like I'm learning.

3) after every lesson, whether I feel like it's a better one than the one before or not, I come home feeing sick to my stomach, like I just couldn't wait till it's over because I'm not enjoying my lessons, he constantly makes me feel **** because he's expecting me to be a fast learner or not make mistakes, I sit next to people who have been driving manual for years and still stall/not change gear properly.

I don't know whether to change after 15 lessons, I found this guy on gum tree for my area in north west London and "people" said he has put up their confidence but I feel like he's stepping on my throat for every mistake I make, and therefore I feel like I can't perfect them because he can't come to understand that I'm a slow learner or get more nervous the way he acts.

This being said I still consider that, ok I know it took me a while to get used to the clutch control, driving in London and in traffic is stressful and ye I've even stalled in my 15th lesson, I understand the biting point etc, and I've never ever driven before these 15 hours and I fee like he's expecting me to be some professional driver and never make mistakes again. I accept it took me a while, and I could have been a little careless at times in terms of wheel movement, but I've aced that however I still dread going to my lessons because of the way he acts and is ignorant to my learning process.

I'm kind of stuck on what to do, because 15 hours is a lot and I've come a long way from starting from scratch, however like I said, he doesn't build my confidence, makes me more nervous as I fee like I have to "impress him" and lastly I feel **** going into the car and leaving the lesson. What do you guys think I should do and share your experiences below if you want.


I think you know what you need to do. You're paying him money to teach you how to drive, not to make you feel like crap.

I am currently learning to drive, too, and I make mistakes as well. My instructor is great-he doesn't make me feel stupid-whilst he does acknowledge that the mistake has been made, we have a laugh about it and move on. That's how it should be. I used to get really caught up in my mistakes (still do sometimes) that I would allow the entire lesson to slip because I was too busy dwelling on what happened before.

The way I look at mistakes now, if no one was hurt and I didn't damage the car or anything, it's not worth getting worked up over it. Yes, remember it and store it away for future reference, but no point in dwelling on it.

Learning to drive should be a fun experience. It shouldn't be one you dread. Nerves are normal, dread is not. Everyone learns at different paces. A good instructor will understand this and adapt his style to suit you. Think about it. You're the one paying him money, so why put up with someone who makes you feel like you do? You don't have to. You can take your business elsewhere.

Start looking for other instructors-ask friends/relatives who have passed if they have anyone they can recommend. Then have a taster session with one of them and see if they suit you.

You will likely find that upon switching to a good instructor that your driving improves because you will have the freedom to make mistakes and learn from them, without feeling too scared of their reaction to do it.

As far as the 15 hours goes, think of it like an investment. You know this instructor is not right for you, but you continue to stick with him because you've invested x amount of time and money into it. Aren't you just throwing good money away with the bad? In the end, you're likely going to spend longer learning (and more money too) or maybe even quit because he's hammered your confidence into the ground. That doesn't sound like a good investment to me.
(edited 8 years ago)
Sounds like you need a new driving instructor.
Reply 7
Laugh when he shouts at you. It kinda helps
Why would you want to pay someone over £20+ an hour who makes you feel rubbish?
Get a new instructor who will help you relax and teach you how to drive properly!
Often the best way to find a decent instructor is to ask among your friends/family who they learned with


Posted from TSR Mobile
Change your instructor.

There is no excuse for shouting, eye ball rolling or generally making the pupil feel like an idiot.

Mistakes are an inevitable part of learning. Some people take longer to get it than others. The one's who get it first time are the rarity.

Quite often when I am teaching maneuvers pupils will do the first one perfectly. Yay! Then we seem to spend the next hour or so exploring all the ways not to do it until we end up with a the perfect manoeuver again. Doh! :smile:

Driving lessons should be fun not terrifying. Every mistake is teaching you what not to do and building your experience.

I wouldn't get to hung up with Grade. That is decided by an examiner observing the delivery of a one hour lesson every couple of years.

Lesson price is a better indicator. It is much easier to be patient when you are not working excessive hours to make ends meet and worried sick about paying the bills.
Original post by myDrivingInstr
Change your instructor.

There is no excuse for shouting, eye ball rolling or generally making the pupil feel like an idiot.

Mistakes are an inevitable part of learning. Some people take longer to get it than others. The one's who get it first time are the rarity.

Quite often when I am teaching maneuvers pupils will do the first one perfectly. Yay! Then we seem to spend the next hour or so exploring all the ways not to do it until we end up with a the perfect manoeuver again. Doh! :smile:

Driving lessons should be fun not terrifying. Every mistake is teaching you what not to do and building your experience.

I wouldn't get to hung up with Grade. That is decided by an examiner observing the delivery of a one hour lesson every couple of years.

Lesson price is a better indicator. It is much easier to be patient when you are not working excessive hours to make ends meet and worried sick about paying the bills.


This is true
and thansk to your post about the clutch control. I've just come back from my lesson near rotherhithe and have been going up and down, and firmly braking, and my positioning on the road was really good! switching to 1st gear when stopping and moving!

thanks again, it really helped aha
Wow he sounds like an utter knob. I was in a similar situation last year with my instructor at the time. I had about 13 lessons with him and basically wasn't getting anywhere and I dreaded each lesson because we didn't have the same kind of attitude and he wasn't the best at teaching and he thought because he understood it, I should too after him only vaguely explaining things. I also suffered badly from panic attacks then and he knew this but he kept just saying I was only a nervous learner, whereas I was nervous overall with everything because I had several anxiety disorders.

I ended up quitting as my panics became unbearable. I felt a relief but then I remember why I was learning in the first place - my stepdad takes strokes now and won't be able to drive for much longer and him and my bf are the only ones who can drive so I need to learn as well so more people in the close family can drive.

So last week after 11 months out of driving, I finally plucked up the courage to find a new instructor especially since my panics have been under control for about 6 months and today was my first lesson with a new instructor and I have to say, she's everything I would want in an instructor. She's really bouncy and friendly yet knows all her stuff, if you make a mistakes she tells you to laugh it off and then corrects your error, she doesn't force you into doing anything you don't think you are ready for at that stage in your driving and generally, just a really good laugh and easy to get on with. Today's lesson flew in instead of dragging in like my old ones and in that one lesson, I learned and did more than any of the lessons I done last year.

So if you haven't already, please switch instructors. Ask around your friends or family to see who they recommend or have a look at reviews online and FB. Driving lessons should be tough but easy going and shouldn't fill you with dread.

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Reply 12
Yes same experience with Beament of PDS - he is always late - 30 to 40 minutes every lesson and in 45 sessions he only taught parking three times! Now he says I cannot do the test for many more weeks. Am very suspicious of him and left him and feel very cheated he took my money - a mother of 2 with only part time work.
Reply 13
Original post by Nardio
Yes same experience with Beament of PDS - he is always late - 30 to 40 minutes every lesson and in 45 sessions he only taught parking three times! Now he says I cannot do the test for many more weeks. Am very suspicious of him and left him and feel very cheated he took my money - a mother of 2 with only part time work.

Sorry to hear that , he is an ***hole - find another instructor- do not give up and do not take any s***- any issues with next instructor- report them to DVSA!

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