How do I speak to my crush for the first time without chickening out again

Apologies for it being long.Last Friday i had decided i was going to speak to my crush for the first time. However when the opportunity arose, i chickened out. It was only me and her, she was waiting for a lift to come on her own (she always seems to be on her own) and i approached her. However when i got near her nerves overcame me and i couldnt get any words out. She then got in the lift and i walked off in shame. I've been regretting it ever since then and even went back around the whole college looking for her, i couldnt find her anywhere.

Ill get to see her in the same situation tomorrow but i dont want to chicken out again.
Im really shy and quiet so that doenst help. I dont know her name so i can't speak online to her (i want to do it in person anyway).
I think i thought too much when i saw her last time. Do i need to just not think and go for it (people have mentioned a 3 second rule online)?
Thanks
I am 18 and male by the way. This will be in college
I don't want to screw up so im really nervous about it.
Its also the first time ill have spoken to any crush I've had and the first time speaking to her also.
Should i ask her to lunch with me if things go well?

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Bump^

You're a bit eager with the bumping there, it's not even been an hour.

Get to know her before asking her to lunch. It might be a bit weird from her point of view if someone she's never spoken to her walks up and asks her out to lunch. Chat to her when you see her, and get to know her a bit. When you feel as if she's comfortable with you, then ask her to lunch.

Reply 3

Mihael_Keehl

Might as well wait outside the lift tbh

Reply 4

whorace

Ask her if she needs a lift.

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

Original post by georgiaswift

Im getting nervous about it. I just wanted some advice.

I was gonna chat with her first and see how things went. If it goes well should i ask her to lunch then?
I dont want to come across as weird. I really dont want to screw this up.
Do you have any advice on not chickening out again?
That was the problem last time?
Thanks for the answer btw.

Reply 6

Anonymous #1

Original post by Mihael_Keehl

Might as well wait outside the lift tbh

I doubt that will work.
She'll think im a stalker or something.

Reply 7

Anonymous #1

Original post by whorace

Ask her if she needs a lift.

Your comments are brilliant man. Not entirely useful but funny.

Reply 8

Kevin De Bruyne

I have no particularly useful advice, but don't be too hard on yourself. It's incredibly difficult to talk to someone for the first time, especially if you have no immediate connection to them like being in their class or group or anything like that.

Me being me, I might say 'hey, pretty girl - come here often?' (the joke being that she goes to the same school as you :tongue:

)

(edited 8 years ago)

Reply 9

Anonymous #1

Original post by SeanFM

I have no particularly useful advice, but don't be too hard on yourself. It's incredibly difficult to talk to someone for the first time, especially if you have no immediate connection to them like being in their class or group or anything like that.

Me being me, I might say 'hey, pretty thing - come here often?' (the joke being that she goes to the same school as you :tongue:

)

It was the perfect situation though. I guess its because i saw her close up for the first time and she was absolutely beautiful (ive never seen someone who looks as good as she does). She seems really nice and quiet so shes not gonna be really mean to me (at least i hope she wont be).
She knows i exist as we made some eye contact throught the lesson but that was it.
Do have aby ideas on how i can stop being so nervous about this.
I guess i could say that but thats not really me.
Thanks for the response.

Reply 10

THE LIFEOF PABLO

Don't take any advice from a bunch of losers on TSR. Just approach her casually without indicating you like her, try to be aloof. Most girls I know like that, so it might work. I also feel like your the type of guy that stares at the girl he likes? Don't do that.

Reply 11

Kevin De Bruyne

Original post by Anonymous

I would say don't invest too much of your time or feelings into it just yet, so you feel less pressure/nerves, and just say hi, think of something cheesy to say beforehand and just say it :tongue:

or even get into the lift, ask her what she wants you to press (if applicable) and get talking from there.

Reply 12

Anonymous #1

Original post by SeanFM

I would say don't invest too much of your time or feelings into it just yet, so you feel less pressure/nerves, and just say hi, think of something cheesy to say beforehand and just say it :tongue:

or even get into the lift, ask her what she wants you to press (if applicable) and get talking from there.

Ive been trying not to think about her but its extremely hard.
I was gonna get in the lift before but there were other people in there so i left (if it was only me and her i would have got in with her).
Ive learned that i really dont want tk go through another week like this. Ive keen constantly kicking myself for being a chicken. I really want to do it.

Reply 13

Anonymous #1

Original post by THE LIFEOF PABLO

Steady on there man.
I am gonna approach her casually but shes gonna know i have some form of interest in her.
I dont stare at her. Ill glance over at her occasionally during the lesson but i have work to do so i get on with that (also helps to pass time quicker).

Reply 14

Kevin De Bruyne

Original post by Anonymous

Do you have any mutual friends?

Reply 15

Anonymous #1

Original post by SeanFM

Do you have any mutual friends?

No idea. Shes always on her own so i dont know who her friends are.

Reply 16

Kevin De Bruyne

Original post by Anonymous

No idea. Shes always on her own so i dont know who her friends are.

okay, it is pretty difficult then.

Just know that it's going to be at least somewhat awkward no matter what you do but find something to break the ice, talk to her and then if she responds well then it will get easier to talk to her, have lunch etc. And try not to overthink it or become too attached.

Reply 17

Anonymous #1

Original post by SeanFM

Yeah.
I can imagine that. Were pretty much strangers to each other so its gonna be awkward to.start with.
I was gonna say hi, how are you etc. Then tell her my name after she responds. I was then gonna ask her about what shes studying at college and see what happens from there.
It also doesnt help that im really quiet but it means a lot to me, i really want this so im gonna do my best as thats all i can do.
Ill stay friendly with her and try not to give her any hints that i like her yet. That can wait for another time (if im sucessful this time).
Should i drive her somewhere to get lunch. Its only a 5 minute drive (if that) but theres nowhere to walk to close by. I feel as though that will make her uncomfortable (which will happen to start with, i can accept thatbut i want her to be as relaxed as possible about things).

Reply 18

Anonymous #1

Update: I spoke to her!!!!!!!!
She was really nice and friendly. We walkd to the bus stop together (she was going home. I didnt invite her to lunch because of that).
She said yeah sure when i asked her if we could get to know each other a bit better. So we chatted for around 15 mins and got to know each other a bit better.
It all went really well IMO.
Ive also now got her on FB so we can chat on there (she agreed to that).
Thanks for the advice everyone it really helped me.