I wanted to get away but now I'm attached and I've let it gone on for too long
-I met him online on a dating site
-Hes 25, I'm 21
- We can talk endlessly on the phone
- We've met up three times so far
- I've tried ending it a few times, I don't like it when he speaks dirty and I'm just looking for a guy who has class and isn't like that. Maybe it's because I'm still a virgin.
- On the first date, he kept touching me and I kept taking his hand off.. Didn't like the persistence esp after I told him numerous times not to. He also gave me a lovebite on the upper part of my boob. Tried getting him off but apparently he didn't notice.
-So I thought let me end it while Ill can
- I told him why I didnt want to continue and that I wasn't comfortable with him, I blocked him on whatsapp. However, he was SO persistent to get me back. He kept calling me endlessly, even from his mum's phone. And he sent me endless texts saying he's sorry, he got carried away, he won't do it again, he wants a chance, he really likes me and isn't going to give up etc
- Added him back
-We were playing a online game and he ruined it by drawing dirty pictures of stickmen having sex and I stopped talking to him cause I just thought it was unnecessary. But again he was persistent.
-Met him two more times
-Second meet made me cry - he said I wasn't assertive enough and said that he thinks I want it (started kissing my boob). And told me I should be more assertive. -.- He kept begging me to not hold this against him, and said please promise u wont block me when u get home, we can sort this out. I'll listen to you more.
-Third meet- he was better, but Im still not comfortable in his presence.
He's 25 and he's looking to settle down and he's told his family about me. He keeps asking for my parents number and says that he wants to meet them but its too soon... He also keeps asking me "when are we getting engaged". But, it hasn't even been long. He says he wants me before someone else takes me lool... He also said he loves me but I havent said it back.
Idk if im the problem. But I don't want anything sexual until things are very serious.. thats just me
-Hes 25, I'm 21
- We can talk endlessly on the phone
- We've met up three times so far
- I've tried ending it a few times, I don't like it when he speaks dirty and I'm just looking for a guy who has class and isn't like that. Maybe it's because I'm still a virgin.
- On the first date, he kept touching me and I kept taking his hand off.. Didn't like the persistence esp after I told him numerous times not to. He also gave me a lovebite on the upper part of my boob. Tried getting him off but apparently he didn't notice.
-So I thought let me end it while Ill can
- I told him why I didnt want to continue and that I wasn't comfortable with him, I blocked him on whatsapp. However, he was SO persistent to get me back. He kept calling me endlessly, even from his mum's phone. And he sent me endless texts saying he's sorry, he got carried away, he won't do it again, he wants a chance, he really likes me and isn't going to give up etc
- Added him back
-We were playing a online game and he ruined it by drawing dirty pictures of stickmen having sex and I stopped talking to him cause I just thought it was unnecessary. But again he was persistent.
-Met him two more times
-Second meet made me cry - he said I wasn't assertive enough and said that he thinks I want it (started kissing my boob). And told me I should be more assertive. -.- He kept begging me to not hold this against him, and said please promise u wont block me when u get home, we can sort this out. I'll listen to you more.
-Third meet- he was better, but Im still not comfortable in his presence.
He's 25 and he's looking to settle down and he's told his family about me. He keeps asking for my parents number and says that he wants to meet them but its too soon... He also keeps asking me "when are we getting engaged". But, it hasn't even been long. He says he wants me before someone else takes me lool... He also said he loves me but I havent said it back.
Idk if im the problem. But I don't want anything sexual until things are very serious.. thats just me
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Original post by Anonymous
\
-We were playing a online game and he ruined it by drawing dirty pictures of stickmen having sex and I stopped talking to him cause I just thought it was unnecessary. But again he was persistent.
-We were playing a online game and he ruined it by drawing dirty pictures of stickmen having sex and I stopped talking to him cause I just thought it was unnecessary. But again he was persistent.
lol
Block everything that has to do with him girrl. Like thats just over the frickin top excessively clingy/creepy. And please don't give into his 'persistence'. And I bet you can find a muuuch muuuch better guy than that 
Thanks for your responses, I knew I wasn't crazy and "over-reacting" as he keeps calling me lol. Ugh, but he's made me attached as we talk for hours on the phone, our personalities actually gel well. It's hard now. Wish I got away sooner lol
Original post by Alexion
It sounds like you're finding every reason to not like him, and heck, you've got a lot of 'em.
I'd end it, there's plenty of better men out there
I'd end it, there's plenty of better men out there
He says that too. He says i only look at the bad things.
On the first meet, it was 9pm and I missed my train and the next one was an hour away and he sat and waited with me. And he always makes sure I get my train before he drives off.
I'm conflicted. ;(
Original post by Anonymous
He says that too. He says i only look at the bad things.
On the first meet, it was 9pm and I missed my train and the next one was an hour away and he sat and waited with me. And he always makes sure I get my train before he drives off.
I'm conflicted. ;(
On the first meet, it was 9pm and I missed my train and the next one was an hour away and he sat and waited with me. And he always makes sure I get my train before he drives off.
I'm conflicted. ;(
Considering all you can see is the bad things, it's clearly not good for you...
He may still be a nice guy, but maybe he's just not the right guy for you.
Original post by Alexion
Considering all you can see is the bad things, it's clearly not good for you...
He may still be a nice guy, but maybe he's just not the right guy for you.
He may still be a nice guy, but maybe he's just not the right guy for you.
Dya think I should meet him one more time and see how it goes? I've been talking to him since last november.
Maybe you're right
Tbh, I dont have a lot of experience when it comes to guys
Original post by Anonymous
Thanks for your responses, I knew I wasn't crazy and "over-reacting" as he keeps calling me lol. Ugh, but he's made me attached as we talk for hours on the phone, our personalities actually gel well. It's hard now. Wish I got away sooner lol
Just because your 'personalities gel well' doesn't mean you won't find someone else you like. This guy exhibits typical abusive behaviour - which escalates and doesn't have to start out 'that bad'. He doesn't stop when you tell him to, he is putting pressure on you by being overtly sexual, he promises not to do it again and apologises but then does the same pattern...I think it's pretty obvious from all the stuff you said that you need to get out now while it's easy because he doesn't have your parents numbers and you're not engaged. He's told his family about you ffs and relentless calls even from blocked numbers when you try to end things, he seems possessive - especially when it comes to your virginity. He's a straight up creep and blocking him (including not taking any calls from him or unknown numbers) is best right now so you can just close this chapter.
The above is based on what you said and not a singular part of your post so I know guys who do one thing aren't all creeps but the big picture of this guy makes me absolutely think he is.
Edit: don't give him more chances just cos you're inexperienced - and the whole waiting for the train post is just normal niceness, don't place extra weight on it because he is telling you you're being unfair.
(edited 8 years ago)
Original post by Anonymous
Dya think I should meet him one more time and see how it goes? I've been talking to him since last november.
Maybe you're right
Tbh, I dont have a lot of experience when it comes to guys
Maybe you're right
Tbh, I dont have a lot of experience when it comes to guys
Original post by Anonymous
- On the first date, he kept touching me and I kept taking his hand off.. Didn't like the persistence esp after I told him numerous times not to. He also gave me a love-bite on the upper part of my boob. Tried getting him off but apparently he didn't notice.
-So I thought let me end it while Ill can
-Second meet made me cry
-Third meet ... I'm still not comfortable in his presence.
-So I thought let me end it while Ill can
-Second meet made me cry
-Third meet ... I'm still not comfortable in his presence.
None of the other times seem to have gone well... why would you want to meet him again? It'll likely end up getting chalked up alongside these three as being another uncomfortable experience...
Thats appalling. He doesnt respect you, he doesnt listen to you, is iimature, selfish and bad news.
You are only 21, there are plenty of men you will meet who you will enjoy their company more and will be much jappier with. Alarm bells are ringing all over about this one. Just send him an e-mail or chat online saying you would like to finish with him as you dont feel you are compatible and he doesnt make you happy. Youve thought about it and tiy dont wnat to be together. You are going to cut contact and you ask that he respects your wishes not to contact you anymore.
Cyt him from everything and do not talk. If he persists tell him you will contact the police.
You are only 21, there are plenty of men you will meet who you will enjoy their company more and will be much jappier with. Alarm bells are ringing all over about this one. Just send him an e-mail or chat online saying you would like to finish with him as you dont feel you are compatible and he doesnt make you happy. Youve thought about it and tiy dont wnat to be together. You are going to cut contact and you ask that he respects your wishes not to contact you anymore.
Cyt him from everything and do not talk. If he persists tell him you will contact the police.
Original post by Anonymous
-We were playing a online game and he ruined it by drawing dirty pictures of stickmen having sex
-We were playing a online game and he ruined it by drawing dirty pictures of stickmen having sex
omfg LOOOOOL.
anyhow, the fact that he said he wouldn't do it again and then continues to do it again in an indicator for the future. He clearly doesn't stick to what he says, a man that bs'es like that will surely cause more problems.
dw you're not crazy, he's just creepy af and doesn't know when to stop. If you saying no doesn't mean no to him who knows what could happen in the future?
Original post by Anonymous
Dya think I should meet him one more time and see how it goes?
Original post by Jennie1987
Just because your 'personalities gel well' doesn't mean you won't find someone else you like. This guy exhibits typical abusive behaviour - which escalates and doesn't have to start out 'that bad'. He doesn't stop when you tell him to, he is putting pressure on you by being overtly sexual, he promises not to do it again and apologises but then does the same pattern...I think it's pretty obvious from all the stuff you said that you need to get out now while it's easy because he doesn't have your parents numbers and you're not engaged. He's told his family about you ffs and relentless calls even from blocked numbers when you try to end things, he seems possessive - especially when it comes to your virginity. He's a straight up creep and blocking him (including not taking any calls from him or unknown numbers) is best right now so you can just close this chapter.
The above is based on what you said and not a singular part of your post so I know guys who do one thing aren't all creeps but the big picture of this guy makes me absolutely think he is.
Edit: don't give him more chances just cos you're inexperienced - and the whole waiting for the train post is just normal niceness, don't place extra weight on it because he is telling you you're being unfair.
The above is based on what you said and not a singular part of your post so I know guys who do one thing aren't all creeps but the big picture of this guy makes me absolutely think he is.
Edit: don't give him more chances just cos you're inexperienced - and the whole waiting for the train post is just normal niceness, don't place extra weight on it because he is telling you you're being unfair.
Thanks so much, you're right. How do I end it though? I've tried so many times to end it by explaining things to him and I don't wanna block him out of the blue cause I wouldn't want that for myself. I don't want it to be bitter and cold nor do I wanna hurt him and stuff.. I think I'm too soft
Original post by Anonymous
Thanks so much, you're right. How do I end it though? I've tried so many times to end it by explaining things to him and I don't wanna block him out of the blue cause I wouldn't want that for myself. I don't want it to be bitter and cold nor do I wanna hurt him and stuff.. I think I'm too soft
Erm lost the anon btw. Just do the same, it's all you can do; send him a message saying it's all too much and no matter what he says this is the end. You are moving on because this relationship isn't right and no matter what phone he uses to call you this time you're not picking up. No more apologies or excuses.
As soon as you send it, block him across everything. He knows what he's done wrong and has been told countless times that you don't want the relationship so stop worrying about his feelings and put yourself as the main priority.
If you need to, tell people your sim broke and get a new one so he doesn't have your number. It's dead cheap and easy.
(edited 8 years ago)
Original post by Alexion
None of the other times seem to have gone well... why would you want to meet him again? It'll likely end up getting chalked up alongside these three as being another uncomfortable experience...
That's true guess im just constantly looking for something to change and be better. How do I end it though because I look so stupid and he wont take me seriously because ive done it before
Original post by 999tigger
Thats appalling. He doesnt respect you, he doesnt listen to you, is iimature, selfish and bad news.
You are only 21, there are plenty of men you will meet who you will enjoy their company more and will be much jappier with. Alarm bells are ringing all over about this one. Just send him an e-mail or chat online saying you would like to finish with him as you dont feel you are compatible and he doesnt make you happy. Youve thought about it and tiy dont wnat to be together. You are going to cut contact and you ask that he respects your wishes not to contact you anymore.
Cyt him from everything and do not talk. If he persists tell him you will contact the police.
You are only 21, there are plenty of men you will meet who you will enjoy their company more and will be much jappier with. Alarm bells are ringing all over about this one. Just send him an e-mail or chat online saying you would like to finish with him as you dont feel you are compatible and he doesnt make you happy. Youve thought about it and tiy dont wnat to be together. You are going to cut contact and you ask that he respects your wishes not to contact you anymore.
Cyt him from everything and do not talk. If he persists tell him you will contact the police.
Thats exactly how I felt, I felt disrespected and it's nice to have it validated cause then it feels like im not over reactivate. Thanks for that
Original post by Anonymous
That's true guess im just constantly looking for something to change and be better. How do I end it though because I look so stupid and he wont take me seriously because ive done it before
IT DOESNT MATTER IF YOU LOOK STUPID! You need to stop caring what he thinks, just like he doesn't care when you say no or its over. Doesn't matter if he doesn't take you seriously, if you keep ignoring his calls and blocking him that's it you've got the control. Eventually he should give up because that's what you ask him to do - if he doesn't he's a stalker / it's harassment and just proves how bad he is. Then change your usernames and numbers and addresses.
JUST SAY ME AND YOU=OVER give him a slap while your at it
Its obvious he wont take no for an answer, so be prepared. If you engage with him rather than dropping him dead, then it will necourage him. Cut all contact and he will get bored eventually. If he sends anything abusive save it in a folder and you cna show it the police if it goes that far. I get the feeling he thinks as he is older he will be able to manipulate you.
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