Oh my god. This is exactly me. I've been in this state for almost a year cause of my boyfriend at the time. He really made me lose my self confidence. He put me down about the way I looked, what I ate, who I would sit with everything..
In regards to all of that, I was self harming, eating more .. ( gained so much weight ) and feeling really depressed. I had anxiety myself , times I couldn't breathe.
I totally can understand how you're feeling at the moment. It is not nice.
It's easy for people to say just get over them . Clearly they're not doing you good. And then as ' humans' we're supposed to have a button that switches and tells us to keep all negativity away. But it's hard . Especially when you had deep connections with that person, and your day doesn't feel normal. Cause normal to you was waking up next to your partner or on the phone to them for hours and hours. Or meeting them in the mornings before college etc and the evening again.
I'm seeing a counsellor next week, and I really hope it helps me again.
Honestly you're not alone ! Direct message if you like ☺️